


Unshaken

by The_Mill_Kat



Category: Red Dead Redemption (Video Games)
Genre: Arthur Morgan Deserves Happiness, Arthur Morgan Lives, Drama, F/M, Fluff and Smut, High Honor Arthur Morgan, Hurt Arthur Morgan, Red Dead Redemption 2 Spoilers, Romance, Slow Burn, Video Game: Red Dead Redemption (2010), Video Game: Red Dead Redemption 2 (2018)
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-04-18
Updated: 2020-08-17
Packaged: 2021-03-02 04:06:52
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 11
Words: 68,968
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23708854
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/The_Mill_Kat/pseuds/The_Mill_Kat
Summary: You save a mysterious man who is dying on a mountain. Finding out he has Tuberculosis, you use your knowledge and skills with herbs and natural remedies to save him from death and help nurse him back to health. As he slowly starts to recover, you can’t help but wonder: Who is this man? Why had you found him the way that you did, beaten and ill? Only time, patience … and perhaps love … will tell.
Relationships: Arthur Morgan/Reader
Comments: 58
Kudos: 252





	1. Chapter 1

Gunshots.

You could hear gunshots ring out in the sky. You looked up at your older brother Austin who had been leaning against a tree reading a book as you were picking herbs.

Your brother looked up, having heard them as well.

“We need to get outta here,” he said, closing his book and rushing over to the wagon. He hopped into the driver’s seat as he motioned you towards him. “Let’s go, Y/N!”

Standing up from where you were kneeling you stuffed the plants you had picked into your satchel and quickly climbed onto the wagon next to him. Austin grabbed the reins of the white Shire and started steering the horse away.

As you made your way past O’Creagh’s Run, you suddenly heard men shouting from the same direction the gunshots had come from. One voice sounded angry, but then you heard a second voice sounding out in pain.

You put your hand on Austin’s arm, “Wait!”

He pulled back on the reins, giving you a puzzled look. “For what?”

You bit your lip in hesitation, unsure whether or not you wanted to find out what was going on, what if something had gone horribly wrong for an unfortunate stranger? You eyed the carbine repeater lying on the foot rest.

“We need to leave ’fore we’re caught up in whatever mess is going on over there,” Austin said harshly through gritted teeth, interrupting your thoughts.

Another pained cry rang out through the night sky, and curiosity instantly got the better of you. You snatched the reins from your brother and before he realized what you were up to, you immediately began steering the wagon in the direction the sounds were coming from, straight toward the mountain east of the lake.

“What in the hell are you doin’, Y/N!?” Austin shouted over the whipping wind as you sped the wagon around the lake towards the mountain. Austin lifted a hand to keep his hat in place as he used the other to try and regain control of the reins.

You completely ignored him however, slapping his hand away as you snapped the reins again, getting the horse to go even faster. You had no idea what came over you, but there was no changing your mind. You’d heard someone in pain, and every instinct you had wanted to try and help. Whether it be real or a trap, you had a rifle for a reason, didn’t you?

As you drew closer to the sounds, you could’ve sworn you saw a man with dirty blonde hair disappearing into the forest. He was swearing and snarling to himself, his voice similar to the angry shouts you’d heard, but he was alone. The other voice, the one that had sounded so distressed ... were they still up there?

With a bad feeling in your gut you snapped the reins again.

Finally, you reached the foot of the small mountain, and as soon as you got to a rocky area where the wagon couldn’t travel any further, you leapt off, grabbing Austin's rifle before he could say a word. Following the sounds, you began to climb the large rock. You had no idea what was going through your mind, forgetting about anything and everything around you except for the noises. You followed them up a steep hill until you reached a lone tree.

All you could hear were pained grunts as you got closer, but they seemed to be getting weaker and weaker.

Walking around the corner of the rocks ... you stopped right in your tracks when you saw a large man lying on the hard ground as the sun was just starting to peak over the horizon. You let out a soft breath, approaching cautiously.

His head was turned toward the coming dawn, so he didn’t see you as you came over.

The man was badly injured, covered in blood. Cuts and bruises stuck out on his pale skin all over his body. The man's breathing was weak, the rising and falling of his chest slowing down more and more until it stopped … he didn’t seem to be moving ...

You ran over and fell to your knees, placing the rifle on the ground next to you.

His eyes were closed, his face a pale mask of death. Bending over him you put your ear to his chest. He was no longer breathing, and his heartbeat was slowing down.

Instinct immediately set in, and the doctor in you took over.

With no time to lose you opened your satchel and rummaged through several of the small glass jars until you found the right ones, two small vials filled with several mixed herbs. With precious seconds you poured out the contents into your palm, rubbed the herbs between your hands vigorously and grabbed the water flask hanging from your belt.

Reaching over you placed a gentle hand to his cheek, turning his head so he was facing you. His skin was so cold against your touch, and you couldn’t help but notice the blood that stained your fingers. You shook the thought of fear aside and opened his mouth, placing the now crushed herbs on his tongue. Holding up his head, you held up the flask’s lid to his lips and poured the water into his mouth, making sure that the herbs were swallowed.

The man put up no fight whatsoever. He didn’t even open his eyes. You had no clue if you were already too late. But whatever hope there was left, the herbs you had given him would give him a chance. The crushed herbs would let out a chemical that, when the types of plants were mixed and consumed, acted as a drug to speed up the heart’s beating and make it easier to breathe to keep one alive no matter how weak they were.

But only for a little while.

“Y/N, what the hell do you think you’re doin’!” Austin shouted as he ran over to you. “That man might be dangerous!” He snatched the rifle off the ground and pointed it right at the man’s chest.

That made you angry. Grabbing the barrel of the rifle you snatched it out of your brother’s hold, throwing the gun’s strap over your shoulder. “Shut the hell up and help me take him to the wagon, Austin!” You snapped.

Austin’s face went passive. Once you began cursing he knew you were not a woman to be messed with. He shot a glare at you and without saying another word he came over and helped you lift the man up. It was a struggle, but the two of you managed to rush him back down to the wagon. As soon as you reached it, you climbed into the back, making room by moving over several of the crates that had been stacked together. When there was finally enough room Austin helped you lift the man up into the back and you laid him down gently, making sure he was as comfortable as possible.

“Take the reins, Austin. Get us back to the cabin, and be quick about it!” You said firmly.

By the expression on your brother’s face you knew he wanted to argue with you, but thankfully he didn’t. Minutes were precious, and every second felt like a stab to the gut as you looked down at the man lying at your feet. Austin climbed into the driver’s seat as you lowered yourself to your knees and looked after the stranger. The snap of reins was heard and the wagon lurched forward, gaining high speed once again as it reached the trail.

The wind was whipping your hair around but you paid no mind as you looked down at the mysterious man lying next to you.

Everything around you seemed to disappear in that moment as you took him in.

In your rush to help him, you hadn’t paid any attention to the man’s features.

His chestnut-brown hair and short rough beard were completely disheveled, his dark thick eyebrows drawn down in pain. His eyes and cheeks were incredibly sunken to the point that he almost looked skeletal. His pale skin looked extremely rough and weathered, mottled in several areas that you could see. There were several cuts along his face and neck as well as his arms, and you were almost afraid to see what other wounds he might have beneath his bloodied clothes.

You reached out and laid a gentle hand on his forehead, the skin there was starting to heat up very quickly, was it a fever? You leaned over until your ear was over his cracked lips. He was breathing again, but it was so weak that it frightened you.

Opening your satchel, you pulled out your stethoscope. Putting it on, you laid the metal disk over his heart — it was beating relatively better and more frequently than it had earlier. You moved the disk around his chest to listen to his breathing. It was still weak, the airways sounding as if they were struggling.

Something wasn’t right.

Reaching into your satchel again, you took out a wooden tongue depressor. The sun was just starting to come up, and the light from the lantern hanging from the wagon also helped you to see as you opened his mouth with the small wooden tool and pressed down on his tongue.

Your heart dropped.

Tuberculosis.

There was blood and sores in the back of his throat; there was no mistaking what it was. Quickly you grabbed another herb from your satchel and placed it on his tongue. You held the flask up to his mouth, pouring water into it to get him to swallow.

He didn’t.

Was he losing the fight?

Again you lifted his head, angling it so that the water could travel down freely. The man suddenly coughed, water sputtering out over his dry lips. He swallowed, and you checked to see if the herb had been consumed. After seeing that there was nothing in his mouth, you let out a sigh of relief. You laid his head back down to let him rest, monitoring him the rest of the way to the cabin to make sure he stayed alive.

After what felt like an eternity, Austin pulled the wagon up to your cabin. Normally the trip would’ve taken much longer, but your brother knew how to ride a wagon at high speeds better than anyone else you knew.

Austin got off the driver’s seat and walked around to the back of the wagon. “This shit is crazy,” you heard him say underneath his breath.

“Excuse me?” You snapped.

He shot a glare at you. “You just hear gunshots and you suddenly decide it’s a good idea t’go find out what it was? You could’ve been hurt, Y/N!”

You didn’t have time for this. “This man is dying, Austin! Please save your petty quarrels for later and help me get him inside!”

He grunted but thankfully didn’t argue any further as he helped you carry him off the back of the wagon, him carrying the man by the torso and you by his ankles. The two of you walked through the front door and carried him into the sitting room.

“Lay him down on the couch,” you said, and Austin led you both over to the long red couch in front of the fireplace.

You laid him out across the thick cushions on his back, placing him down as gently as you could, making sure the man was as comfortable as he could possibly be. “Please get a fire going, Austin?” You asked your brother as you tucked a fluffed pillow underneath the man’s head.

Austin muttered under his breath but he went to do as you asked. You were grateful to have such a loving brother. Even though he could be a pain in the ass, he was still a gentle soul deep down, even if he wouldn’t admit it.

Shaking that thought away, you wasted no time. After you were sure that the man was settled, you ran over to your desk and rummaged through all the the vials in one of the top drawers. You finally found the one you were looking for, and then you grabbed your surgical tray, snatching up all the tools that you needed and placing them on the metal surface. A syringe, a pump attached to a tube, cotton, alcohol, fresh cloths, a large jug of medicinal liquid, and bandages.

Rushing back over, you set the tray on the small table next to the couch, placing the spare cloths on the side table. You grabbed the syringe from the tray, and with precious seconds to spare you pierced the rubber of the lid, drawing the liquid from the vial into the small barrel as you pulled back on the plunger. Next, you leaned over and prodded his inner arm with your index finger until you found a large vein. Once you did, you cleaned the skin with some alcohol and you stuck the needle in, pushing down on the plunger.

The large man let out a deep grunt, and you looked over to see his dark brows drawn down tight, his lips peeled back over his teeth in discomfort. You felt terrible for causing him more pain, but this procedure needed to be done.

After the syringe was empty, you placed it back on the tray. Grabbing some cotton, you pressed it to the injection you had made to keep any more blood from escaping.

Austin came back in with a few logs and walked across the room to set them up in the fireplace. As he got the fire going, you wrapped a bandage around the man’s arm to keep the cotton in place.

You placed your stethoscope back on and listened to his heart and lungs once more, the man was breathing, but every inhale sounded like a battle to get the oxygen his body so desperately needed.

You turned toward your brother as he was finishing up with building the fire. “Austin, I need your help with this next task.”

He stood up and faced you. Even though he looked a bit upset, he asked “What is it?”

“I have to flush his lungs out.”

He looked confused then. “What’s he got?”

You sighed. “He has Tuberculosis.”

Austin’s eyes widened, “Are you sure you need to be treatin’ that?”

“I’ve done it before.”

“On animals!” He snapped.

You narrowed your eyes at him.

He let out a long and exasperated sigh. “Fine, what’ya need me t’do?”

“I need you to get him on his side and hold him still. I’m going to set up the equipment I need and get the pump ready.”

Austin nodded as he walked over to the man and adjusted his position as you got all the necessities ready to prepare the pump. This part was indeed scary since you had never performed this procedure on a human, though you would never admit that fear to your brother. “Is he ready?”

“Ready as he’s ever gon’ be.” Austin replied.

Closing your eyes, you took a deep breath. You knelt at the foot of the couch, the pump ready in your hand. “Just make sure he doesn’t struggle.” You said. Austin had helped you hold animals still during your procedures several times so you knew he would be a big help with this.

Austin gave a small nod, and walked behind the couch to lean over and grip the top of the man’s head in one hand and wrap the other arm around the man’s chest. You weren’t sure how this was going to go or end up, but it was more than worth a try to save a life, if you could.

Your heartbeat was racing with what you were about to do, and you knew you had to be quick. Taking another deep breath, you stuck the long narrow tube down his throat. The man immediately began choking, his limbs kicking from the sudden lack of what little oxygen it had been trying to get. But his struggles were weak due to his state. You began pumping the liquid through the tube as fast as you could, all the while Austin helped keep him still as he held him down.

As soon as the medicine hit his lungs, the man immediately coughed it back up — but that was a good sign. You knew the medicine had washed out his airways, coating the inside and getting to work right away on killing off the bacteria. Now all you had to do was wait; the properties would start going to work on fighting the disease that had built in his lungs. There would need to be several more treatments done, as well as on the rest of his body, but this was a good start.

You pulled the tube from his mouth and placed it back on the tray, and the man coughed and sputtered. As soon as the fit was finished, Austin let go of the man and readjusted him to his previous position. Straightening back up, he walked back to the fireplace to tend to the flames.

Grabbing a fresh cloth from the metal tray, you reached over and cleaned the man’s face, wiping away the mess that had been made, then you leaned down and wiped away the liquid that had been coughed out and spilled onto the floor. When that task was finally complete, you stood to your feet and discarded the wet cloth back onto the tray, taking the supplies into the washroom to clean them and wash your hands. Once you were finished, you made your way back into the sitting room and knelt down on the floor so you could study the man’s face. His expression was relaxed, his brows and lips no longer tightened in pain. Placing your ear on his chest, you listened closely to the man’s breathing … it was steady. Still rough, but it was already much better than it had been before.

You let out a sigh of relief, then looked over your shoulder to see Austin stoking the flames with a metal poker. You smiled at your brother, “Thank you, Austin,” you said, your breath almost catching. No matter how tough he tried to act, what he just did to help you save this man truly meant a lot.

He looked back at you, his eyes cold. He parted his lips, but he didn’t say a word. Suddenly, he stood, tossing the poker to the floor before walking out of the room.

His mood hurt, but you couldn’t let yourself be bothered. Austin might not like it, but at the moment all you cared about was making this stranger well.

You turned back to face the man, but when you looked down at his face, you noticed that his eyes were open.

They were looking right at you.

Your heart nearly skipped a beat, being this close … his eyes — his eyes were the most beautiful color you had ever seen in your life …

“Um — I — Hi, mister,” you said, unable to hold back the crack in your voice. You decided it was because of all the action from earlier, and not those eyes. Definitely not.

The man groaned, opening his mouth, but no sound came out as his lips moved. Was he trying to speak?

“Please, mister,” you said softly, trying to soothe him as you placed a gentle hand on his shoulder, “don’t say anything. I need you to rest for me, alright?”

He didn’t listen, however, and he let out a grunt as he tried to speak again. “H-h- … h-how-,” he seemed to try and swallow, “Wh-where—,” his voice suddenly cracked as another coughing fit similar to the one from earlier came over him.

You quickly grabbed one of the spare cloths from the side table and held it to his mouth as he struggled through the coughing fit. You felt terrible as you watched his body curl into a fetal position through the violent shaking, but you did your best to try and comfort him through it, pushing his hair away from his face and stroking his shoulder.

After what felt like an eternity, his body finally settled, and you cleaned off his face again. Once you were done, you grabbed the thick wool blanket off the back of the couch and laid it over him, tucking it beneath the cushions to make sure he felt as safe and secure as possible. His body had gone limp, and he looked completely exhausted.

You let out a soft sigh as you stood to your feet, taking the dirty cloth back into the washroom to discard it and wash your hands once more. When you came back into the sitting room, the man was looking at you again.

You stilled as he stared at you with those brilliant blue eyes of his. “Wh-where … am …. I?” He said, his deep voice extremely rasped and gravelly as he spoke one word with each breath.

You rushed back over to the couch and knelt by his side, “Don’t worry, mister, you’re safe here,” you said softly, giving him a small smile as you reached out to stroke his shoulder, continuing in your efforts to soothe him.

He grimaced as he grunted in pain again, “Who … are … you?”

You wished he wouldn’t speak so he could rest, but you figured he wasn’t going to relax until he had some answers. “I found you up on a mountain near O’Creagh’s Run. You were dying, and we brought you back here.” You pushed a stray hair away from his brow. “Please don’t speak anymore. You need to rest, you’re safe here.”

He blinked, those blue-green eyes of his gazing straight up at you. “Your … name?”

You looked at him, a little bewildered that he would ask that when he was so weak. You gave another gentle smile, “My name is Y/N.”

Those eyes squinted as he took you in, seeming to study you further.

Finally, he gave a small smile then, opening his mouth once more. 

“Arthur.”

— To Be Continued


	2. Chapter 2

A large buck.

Arthur narrowed his eyes as he saw the creature in the distance, its head bent to the ground as it nipped at the blades of grass. He could’ve sworn he’d seen it before, but where the hell was he this time?

He looked around, taking in the hazy surroundings. The forest was thick with tall trees and wild foliage, the flora consisting of many different and beautiful colors. He could hear birds tittering high up in the branches as the sun’s rays shined through the trees’ thick canopies.

Was he dreaming again?

Arthur tried moving, taking a single step forward —

The buck jerked its head up from where it was grazing, looking over in his direction, directly into his eyes.

Arthur froze, his entire body going still as he looked into those eyes …

They were his own.

A single heartbeat sounded, and suddenly he felt a strong pull as he was sucked right into the stare.

Arthur jerked awake, his eyes opening as he let out a hard gasp. The sudden inhale caused a sharp pain to stab through his chest and he grimaced, letting out a deep groan.

He blinked, a mysterious bright light nearly blinding him. With a grunt he grimaced as he made an effort to lift his head. Sunlight was shining directly on his face, and he couldn’t see a damn thing. His vision was so blurry and he blinked a few more times in an effort to clear it up. Looking around, he tried to take in his surroundings.

Where the hell was he? The last thing he remembered was the feeling of the unforgiving rocky ground. Now he felt nothing but soft cushions beneath his body.

Arthur looked down and noticed that a thick wool blanket was covering him up from his shoulders down. He seemed to be lying on a large couch ... in someone’s house?

He tried to move, but his body didn’t obey. It felt almost as though his limbs were completely paralyzed, as if he’d been drugged. His entire body might as well have been a limp wooden board.

Gathering up all the energy he could, he gradually brought his hand up from his side and lightly gripped the hem of the blanket. Lifting it up slowly, he looked down and saw that he was naked from the waist up, and his entire upper body had been patched up in several areas with thick bandages. Some more bloody than others.

What the hell had happened?

Voices started drifting into his head and he looked around, trying to figure out where they were coming from. He took in the cobblestone fireplace on the other side of the room, a full bookshelf, a couple sitting chairs — whose place was this? There was an open doorway across the room, and the voices seemed to be coming from there. The voices sounded like a man and woman — arguing?

“We can’t afford to be takin’ care of this stranger, Y/N! We’re barely gettin’ by as it is.” The man’s voice sounded angry, having a slight southern touch to his accent.

Stranger? Were they talking about him?

“For the last time, Austin, his name is Arthur! And you need to quit your complainin’!” A woman’s voice that time. Her voice had a somewhat southern lilt to it as well, similar to the man’s but a bit stronger. Who were these people?

Arthur squinted, trying to recall what had happened. He had no clue where he was — how did he get here? No matter how hard he tried he couldn’t seem to remember a damn thing.

Arthur frowned, suddenly realizing that the woman had said his name. How did she know it?

“I don’t give a damn what his name is! You’re wastin’ all our resources on a stranger who’s on the brink of death as it is,” the man snapped.

“This man needed help, Austin. What was I supposed to do? Just leave him there?”

The man named Austin seemed relentless. “You could’ve been killed, Y/N! It could’ve been a trap, what if it’d been an ambush? What would I have told Pa if you’d gotten hurt?”

Y/N … he could’ve sworn he heard that name before. A blurry image of a woman’s face flashed through his mind, and he groaned as the vision caused a sharp stabbing pain in his head.

“I’m sick and tired of arguin’ with you on this, Austin. Nothing bad happened, and I don’t know what else to tell you. You need to get over this already!”

The voices stopped then, and the woman Arthur had been hearing suddenly appeared in the doorway across the room. She stilled right in her tracks, seeming to notice that he had woken up.

•••••

You were getting weary of Austin’s squabbles.

No matter how many times you tried to make your brother see reason he absolutely refused to hear it. Austin had completely lost all rational thought when it came to Arthur’s presence in the cabin, and he took every opportunity he could to remind you how stupid he thought you were for what you did.

You were tired of his behavior, though. Of course, you knew Austin loved you — though he sure had a funny way of showing it sometimes — but his over-protective nature could get a little grating, more often than not. However, he was family, and you couldn’t blame him for wanting to keep you safe.

Still, though, his bellyaching was getting rather annoying. For the past three days Austin had been constantly on your back about you taking the injured man into your cabin and caring for him, and his anger was really starting to irk you.

Really, what else could you have possibly done?

This man … Arthur … he would’ve died on that mountain had you not found him. He’d looked so defenseless, so cold and weak, lying on that unforgiving ground. You knew deep down that you would not have been able to live with yourself had you just left him there.

You turned away from Austin, ready to storm right out of the cabin. There would never be any persuading your brother, and you could no longer stand to be in the same room with him anymore.

Planning to step outside to walk off your frustrations and get some fresh air, you abruptly halted in the doorway to the sitting room at the sight before you.

Arthur was awake, his eyes staring directly at you from across the room. You smiled and walked over to him, kneeling down by his side so that you were face-to-face. “Mornin’, Arthur,” you said in a gentle tone, “How’re you feelin’?”

He didn’t answer right away, seeming to examine you further with his blue-green eyes.

After several seconds passed, he opened his mouth but Austin suddenly came rushing into the room, addressing Arthur with an aggressive tone, “If you dare try anythin’ stupid, cowpoke, I’ll make sure you — ”

You’d had enough, you snapped your head around and glared at your brother, “Get out of here, Austin! Go check on the horses, clean the stables. I don’t care, just get the hell out!”

Austin gave you a pained look, “Y/N, I don’t want you near this man, especially when he’s awake,” he said, adding the last part through gritted teeth. Then he lowered his voice, his tone sounding worried, “What if he tries to harm you?”

You almost felt the strong need to roll your eyes. “Does he look like the sort of man that would try to harm me?”

Austin shot his gaze at Arthur and then back at you, “Yes.”

A short laugh escaped you at the disgusted expression he was making. You couldn’t help it, your brother’s lack of hesitation and how quick he’d been with his answer was almost comical. “Austin, the man is unwell and drugged. He’s not going to try anything on me, not even if he wanted to.”

Austin looked a bit skeptical, but finally gave a reluctant nod. “Fine, I’ll be outside choppin’ wood and takin’ care of the horses,” he shot another glare at Arthur as if in warning, adding darkly, “Shout if you need anythin’.”

You let out a sigh, and gave your brother a reassuring smile. “I’ll be fine. Just let me take care of him, please.”

Austin let out a hard grunt, then turned away and left the cabin through the front door, finally leaving you and the conscious Arthur alone.

You looked back down at Arthur to see that he was staring up at you with a confused expression on his face, those thick brows drawn down tight over his blue-green eyes.

“I’ve got — ” he took a deep breath and let out a long groan “ — so many damn questions.” Another big breath, his chest rising and falling as he flinched. He sounded exasperated, his tone dark and rough, “What the hell’s … goin’ on?”

His voice was much stronger than it had been before, having a heavily accented western drawl to it. It was deep, heavy … how in the world could any man possess such a voice?

You shook yourself away from that thought, focusing on what he’d just said. “Can you remember anything about what happened?” You asked, reaching out and lifting up the thick blanket to examine the old bandages.

Arthur just shook his head in response, “No … can’t say I can.”

After he’d given you his name the other day, he’d passed out soon afterwards from the drug you’d given him. You’d gone to work immediately on examining, cleaning and dressing the wounds on the rest of his body. Since then you’d changed the dressing a couple more times, and now it looked like it was time to do it again.

“Where am I?” He asked you as you stood up to walk into the kitchen and wash your hands in the sink.

The drugs that were being given to him were messing with his memory, but that was to be expected. The anesthetic on top of the herbs you had been treating him with for the past few days were having side effects on him, temporarily clouding up his mind. The medicinal properties tended to have strange and similar side effects on animals you’d treated in the past, making them behave rather strangely.

Treating a human … it was almost foreign.

“You’re in our cabin,” you answered him, “just north of Roanoke Ridge, we live right above Cerberus Falls, near Brandywine.” Once you finished drying your hands with a fresh cloth, you went over to your office, gathering fresh medicinal supplies from your desk.

“How’d I get here?” He asked, taking another deep breath. He let out a hard cough, and you looked over your shoulder to see that he was trying to sit up.

Rushing back over to him, you quickly set the supplies on the side table and placed a hand on his chest, gently pushing to urge him to lay back down.

“You need to lie still.” Keeping you tone soft in an effort to soothe him, you wondered about his last question. Had he forgotten everything from the other night? “We heard gunshots and my brother Austin and I found you on a mountain near O’Creagh’s Run.” You urged him down with your hand until he was lying flat on his back again. “We brought you back here, and I’ve been taking care of you for the past few days — but you have a long while until you’re well enough to get back on your feet.”

He narrowed his eyes at you, as if he were trying to remember the events of that night. “You found me on the mountain?” He asked, his voice graveled.

“Yes.” You took the blanket off of him and set it on the floor, getting to work on taking off the old bandages. “You were extremely weak, you were bleeding and having trouble breathing.”

Those last words made his eyes widen, as if he was suddenly frightened by something.

Instantly Arthur tried to sit up again, his upper body shooting up and startling you, but you quickly overcame your surprise and tried to get him to settle down. Placing a firm hand on his chest, you pushed him back down, trying to get him to relax. “Please, Arthur, I need you to stay still.”

“Get away from me, woman,” he snapped, struggling against your hold. You weren’t all that strong to hold such a large man down, but the state he was in helped in your favor.

You glared at him then, “My name is Y/N, not ‘woman.’ Everything is alright, Arthur, please calm down.” You were trying to keep your voice low in an effort to calm his nerves, but it wasn’t helping. “Please, you really need to rest.”

“No,” he said firmly, almost sounding fearful as he let out another cough. “I got TB, I don’t want … you gettin’ sick cuz of me.”

His unexpected words touched you, almost taking you aback. Here he was, hurt and bare, and he was trying to put you before his own health … even though he barely knew you.

“Arthur, it’s alright,” you said softly, “You won’t get me sick. I got treatments to prevent that from happening.”

Arthur suddenly stopped his struggles, his head turning back to you with a mixed look of surprise and confusion plastered on his face. “Treatments?” He asked, his voice matching the expression he made.

You nodded, “Yes, I’m a doctor that specializes in experimenting on natural remedies for diseases. Tuberculosis is one of them.” You began washing his wounds and redressing them with fresh bandages. Some of them were still more raw than others, but they were already looking much better than they’d had before.

As you worked on securing the bandages, you felt Arthur’s gaze on you. You tried to ignore the stare at first as you finished patching him up, but it went on for so long you couldn’t help but start to feel a little uncomfortable.

“What?” You asked, finally allowing yourself to look up at him as you finished the last patch.

“You … you treat TB?”

You hesitated for a moment, then nodded, “Yes, kind of … though this is my first time doing it on a human.”

His squinted at that, so you were quick to jump in and explain. “It’s the same process. Most species’ lungs are similar to each other,” You started rambling, talking faster and faster as you pretended to be busy with checking his bandages, even though they were already secure. All the while you could feel his scrutinizing gaze on you. “You were about to die, so I didn’t see the harm in trying to treat you — I gave you different doses based on your size —and I … and I needed to flush your lungs out with a special medicine — I just had to use slightly different doses — I mean, herbs because different species tolerate different herbs and I thought that maybe with a human I could — ”

You heard a deep chuckle and looked back up at his face.

He was smiling at you.

That grin had you stop in your tracks and lose all your train of thought right then and there. It was like nothing you’d ever seen on any man, causing a shiver to go through your body.

Arthur took another deep breath, and spoke his next words softly, “So you been treatin’ my TB, huh?”

After a few heartbeats passed, you nodded.

Arthur’s grin widened, but then quickly faded as a thought seemed to occur to him. “How the hell — ” his chest rose and fell, “ — d’you know all this?”

You lifted a brow at his question, “What do you mean?”

“The herbs … natural remedies, as you put them — ” His body convulsed as another coughing fit took over, and he turned his head away until it passed. He didn’t need to since you took some medicine yourself to fight off any possible bacteria, but you appreciated his kind thought. He turned to face you again, “How d’you know … how to treat somethin’ like this?”

You grabbed the hem of the wool blanket and pulled it over his body, tucking it just over his shoulders. “My father, well he was a busy man, but he had a lot of love for animals. My mother was a doctor like me, though I swear to you you’d think she was an herbalist around the clock. Her passion in life had always been about plants and researching their different properties. What they could do, what benefits they gave … ” You laughed then, thinking back, “She would always come to me excited whenever she found something new that a plant or flower could do.”

You thought back to your childhood, unable to hold back a smile as you recalled the memories.

Having grown up on a plantation with a large farm that your grandmother had owned, you knew a lot about all kinds of animals thanks to your parents. Your father had taught you all about the animals and how to take care of them, while your mother would always teach you about all the plants she’d found and what she’d discovered about them.

Your parents had taken in so many sick animals, both wild and owned, caring for and nursing them all back to health. They’d found great joy in aiding the creatures, and you enjoyed learning what you could from them.

Life had been so simple back then.

But … all of that had come to a crashing end when a gang of outlaws had raided your home in the dark of night.

You instantly lost your smile then, the terrible memory flooding your mind against your will.

Both you and your mother had been in the kitchen discussing chores. Your father had been out of town on business with a client, and your brother had been riding out in the country with his horse.

Several of the plantation’s guards had been killed before anyone was able to send out a warning, and the outlaws had managed to break into the house, tying up you and your mother as others ransacked every room as if they’d been searching for something. They’d interrogated and beaten her, only to kill her with a shotgun right in front of you.

If it hadn’t been for the lawmen charging in when they had, you had no doubt the outlaws would’ve done away with you as well. They’d gotten away, though, riding away on their horses and disappearing into the thick forest across the fields.

You felt a tear roll down your cheek. Your brother and father had been absolutely broken at the news when they’d come back. To hear that the woman you all loved more than anything in the world was now gone, and the outlaws responsible for her death had never been found.

No one had ever found out what they’d been after, and since that night, you and your family had never been the same.

And of course, having lost your mother due to a gang, you’d grown up despising outlaws with every ounce of your being to this day. They were monsters. Killers. Thieves. All they ever did was hurt and destroy innocent people and their families.

Your mother had found a passion in saving lives.

You wanted to do the same, and so you’d dedicated your life into carrying on her work.

Gathering yourself so as not to get carried away with your emotions, you took a deep breath and forced a smile, looking back down at the man lying on your couch. “They taught me everything I know, but my mother was the one who encouraged me the most.”

Arthur looked at you for what felt like ages, the silence stretching between the two of you as those blue eyes of his seemed to study you for the longest time. Finally, he took a deep breath, “Your mother sounds … like she were an amazin’ woman,” he said softly.

You didn’t know why, but this man’s deep western drawl and what he said comforted you somewhat.

Nodding, you replied softly. “She was.”

He gave you a gentle smile as if to try and comfort you, “I’m real sorry, Y/N.” His soft tone seemed to melt your nerves, helping you to relax a small bit.

You returned his smile with another one of your own. “Well, she’s in a much better place now.”

“I’ve no doubt,” Arthur replied.

There was another long moment of silence, and it seemed to go on forever, the clock on the wall making the only sound in the quiet room.

Shaking yourself mentally, you stood up quickly and cleared your throat, quickly changing the subject to switch up the mood, “It’s time for another dose.”

Arthur raised those dark brows of his, “What’re you talkin’ ’about?” He asked, your sudden change seeming to have surprised him.

Walking over to your desk again, you grabbed the same vial and an empty syringe, a bottle of alcohol along with cotton and gauze, and finally a spoon and a pot of honey. While you gathered everything you explained it all to him. “You need another shot to help treat your Tuberculosis, Arthur. All of this is supposed to help kill off the bacteria that’s still left in your body. Once that’s done, your lungs and any other effected areas you have can finally start healing.”

“How d’you know all these things?” He asked.

“I had a few farm animals and a couple horses while I was growing up that were struck with the disease,” you answered, “both my mother and father showed me how to do the treatments on some of them.” You came back over with everything, kneeling back down by his side.

“Of course, horse lungs are much bigger and more resistant to Tuberculosis, but that made it easier for us to examine them so we could treat it. Unlike the smaller animals. They were a bit more difficult,” you stated. “My mother made a journal at that time to take notes whenever she would perform these treatments. All the research that she and Pa ever did she wrote down in that journal. It’s now in my desk, and over the last few years I’ve come across other animals struck with all kinds of diseases, including Tuberculosis. Her journal has guided me through all of my treatments.” You met his eyes then, “I haven’t failed in curing one yet.” You added lightly, trying to give off a bit of humor to lighten the mood.

But the effort was in vain, as Arthur just looked at you, almost as if he were questioning the situation. “And I’m the first … human you’ve ever treated?” He asked skeptically, almost sounding concerned.

“Well,” you said with a bit of annoyance from the doubt in his voice, “You were about to die so I guess there was no harm in me tryin’, was there?”

That succeeded in making him let out a sudden burst of laughter, which Arthur regretted instantly. You flinched in sympathy as the pain ran through his entire body. “Son of a bitch,” he swore through gritted teeth, cursing more underneath his breath.

You gave him a sympathetic smile as you prepped the syringe, drawing the liquid from the vial into the barrel.

“What the hell’s that?” He asked you as he stared at the vial of medicine as if it were alien to him.

You almost wanted to laugh at the expression he was making as he stared at the syringe with a strange look. “This is a special remedy that I made myself to treat TB. I need to insert it into you arm now, if that’s alright with you?”

Arthur didn’t answer as he just stared at the needle for the longest time.

“Arthur?”

He seemed to be thinking about whether or not he should trust you.

After several more seconds passed, he finally gave you a small nod, “Sure.”

The way he said that single word sent a shiver down your spine.

Letting out a small sigh, you smiled at him. The fact that he was trusting you like this, especially with putting something he didn’t know of in his own body, it meant a lot more to you than you thought it would.

You gripped his wrist gently and turned his arm until it was facing palm-up. “Alright, Arthur, this is going to sting a bit,” you said as you began prepping his inner arm, rubbing the alcohol into his skin to disinfect the area.

Arthur didn’t say a word, only giving you a small nod.

Once you found the large vein, you brought the point of the sharp needle to his skin and pushed it in. His whole body jerked, and he let out a deep grunt of pain, his eyes squeezing shut as his lips pulled back over his teeth in a hiss.

“Almost done,” you said as you pushed down slowly on the plunger, letting the medicine make its way into his body. After it was empty, you took the needle out and patched him up immediately. “Now don’t go messin’ with that, Arthur,” you said in a firm voice, gesturing at the bandage, “It needs to sit there for a few hours so don’t you go makin’ a mess.”

Arthur chuckled at your authoritative voice. “Yes, ma’am,” he replied teasingly, making you blush.

You couldn’t help but let out a small giggle from his playfulness as you put the syringe away. “Alright, now for the fun part,” you teased back as you picked up the honey pot. Lifting the lid and dipping the spoon in, you scooped out a heaping dose of honey and held it out to him, close to his lips.

“And what’s this for?” He asked, not opening his mouth to take the honey even though he knew you expected him to.

You nearly wanted to roll your eyes as you smiled again. “It’s honey.”

Arthur shot you an annoyed look, “I know it’s honey, dammit.” He snapped, “But why ... are you givin’ it to me?”

“It’s a natural remedy to help kill off Tuberculosis bacteria,” you replied impatiently, pressing the spoon to his lips in an effort to get him to open them. “Now open up, here comes the choo-choo train — choo-chooooo!” You made train noises as you moved the spoon around in the air like a train coming down the tracks. Destination: Arthur’s mouth.

At that very moment the look in those blue-green eyes of his would’ve set a forest on fire. “I ain’t a little kid, missy,” he growled at you, that deep western drawl of his sounding dark and threatening.

“Oh, I know,” you replied, completely unphased by the threat, “But where’s the fun in treatin’ you like an adult if you’re not gonna act like one?”

He growled at that, and with great reluctance parted his lips and accepted the honey as you placed it in his mouth. You waited for him to swallow. Once he did, you took out another spoonful and held it out to him. He took five more more after that, each bite either more or less stubborn than the last. When he was done, you placed the lid back on the honey pot and placed it on the side table.

“All finished!” You said to him cheerfully.

Arthur just snorted at you and looked up at the ceiling. “And how long you been ... torturin’ me like this, Y/N?” He asked in an accusing but playful tone.

“A few days now, though it hasn’t been easy. Had to feed that honey to you through a tube to make sure it made its way to your stomach.”

He grimaced at that, looking disgusted. “Really wish you hadn’t ... told me that part, ma’am.”

You gave him another sympathetic smile, “Well, Arthur, I don’t think we need to do that anymore now that you’re back with us again.”

He chuckled softly at that, the low laughter rumbling deep in his chest, “Let’s hope not, … honey.”

— To Be Continued

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope you enjoyed this chapter! Please let me know what you think.
> 
> This is a very long and and very sweet story with way more to come. This is the ending and beginning that I think Arthur Morgan truly deserves, and in my mind it's what truly happens.
> 
> If you want to read more or access chapters early, there is plenty more content for you to see! I have an account on Tumblr that I upload my content to first, so please go check it out there: @the-mill-kat
> 
> Any comments or shared thoughts are greatly appreciated, thank you for reading!


	3. Chapter 3

2 weeks later

It was mid-morning, the day was absolutely beautiful and you decided to take full advantage of it to tend to your herb garden in the small field next to your cabin. You were on your hands and knees pulling weeds and pruning the plants as the sun shined directly onto you.

The plants you grew needed constant care and were a lot of hard work. But they were worth it, you thought, thinking of all the benefits that they brought. Though it was a difficult task to care for so many kinds of plants, you still enjoyed doing it. Especially whenever you got the chance to go out and see if you could discover any new kinds of herbs to bring back and add to your garden. The hobby was time-consuming, but that was a good thing since it could get boring being by yourself when your brother was out.

But you weren’t by yourself, you thought. Arthur was inside the cabin lying on the couch in the sitting room, still recovering from his tuberculosis.

You smiled to yourself as you pulled another weed from the ground. Arthur had been getting progressively better over the last couple of weeks, and you were so grateful that his body seemed to be growing stronger and stronger with each passing day. Why, just a couple days ago he’d managed to sit up on his own and eat some canned pineapples that you’d decided to give to him. It was really good news that he was able to start eating more solid foods again.

His clothes were another matter you’d worried yourself over. You knew you couldn’t leave him in the same attire for so long, so you’d taken the liberty of taking off his old ones so his body could rest more easily. You’d left his undergarments on out of decency, knowing you could wait for Arthur to decide what he wanted to do past that point.

As you’d undressed him you hadn’t been able to help but admire that body of his. His wounds were healing remarkably well and he had no longer needed any bandages at that point, so his skin had been completely bare for your view. All that thick muscle and that weathered, sun-kissed skin …

At that point you’d forced yourself into a strictly professional state, refusing to allow yourself to look over his body in any other way but medical. You’d washed his old clothes, folded them neatly and placed them on the nightstand by his feet so he’d know where they were when he came to.

You straightened up from the ground and wiped some sweat off your brow with the back of your hand. “Dammit,” you cursed under your breath.

You’d been working ever since your brother had gone out early this morning to go hunting, and that had been at last three hours ago now. You weren’t worried, however. Austin usually took a long time on his trips, often wandering around aimlessly until he found an animal to kill. He wasn’t the greatest tracker, but he tried his best.

Several days ago Austin had returned from one of his trips with a mysterious satchel.

“What do you got there?” You’d asked as he’d brought it into the kitchen and placed it on the wooden table in the middle of the room. You’d went over to close the door to the sitting room so as not to wake Arthur.

“I ain’t too sure,” Austin had answered, taking a seat at the table as you sat down across from him. “I found it by O’Creagh’s Run near where we found that man at.” He scratched his neck. “Haven’t bothered lookin’ in it, figured it might be his.”

You’d looked at your brother skeptically, surprised at that last statement. Due to his strong animosity towards Arthur why on Earth would he not be suspicious of what was in the satchel?

Austin had confessed then, having felt pressured by your peeling gaze. “Alright, alright, I looked. But it didn’t look like nothin’ special. Just an old journal of some kind.”

Your curiosity had peaked at those words and you’d reached into the satchel to pull out the journal. It was definitely worn, but from the edges you could tell that most of the pages had been filled in.

Then you’d lifted the front cover and saw the name in beautiful handwriting.

Arthur

You had immediately closed the journal and placed it back in the satchel, your heart beating rapidly, and Austin had looked over at you questioningly. “Well?” He’d prompted.

“It has his name on the first page,” you’d answered with a shaky voice. You wanted so terribly to see the rest of what was in that journal, but your better conscience won the battle in the end and you’d closed the satchel and locked it in the bottom drawer of your desk, figuring you’d give it to Arthur once he got back on his feet.

You came back to the present at that last thought. Arthur was the first human you had ever treated … and his body was actually responding surprisingly well to everything you had given him.

You reached over to crush some dead leaves off of one of the flower bushes.

You’d been monitoring Arthur’s heart and lungs every day and you could tell the huge difference. The heart was beating regularly and powerfully now, and his lungs were taking in much more air than they had been before. His breaths were getting slightly longer every day, letting you know that they were slowly regenerating the lost tissue that the tuberculosis bacteria had eaten away at. There would be scarring left behind that would stay there for the rest of his life, but you hoped his body would still fully recover enough for him to be able to lead a normal life again.

Only time would tell, though.

He’d been in and out of consciousness for the past two weeks from all the treatments, but that was no doubt a side effect from the medicine and herbs he’d been ingesting. He was also getting better at talking whenever he was conscious, no longer having to take a breath between every few words.

Whenever he woke, you’d taken the opportunity to make sure he ate. Just a few days ago Arthur was able to sit up and start feeding himself. After he would finish his small meals, you made sure he consumed several more spoonfuls of honey each time. It was so important that he take the honey so that it would assist in killing the bacteria in his lungs and the rest of his body.

Honey was the main fighter, the main substance more important than any other in getting Arthur to heal, right next to all the other medicine.

You pondered then, thinking back two weeks ago.

He’d called you honey. At least, you thought he had? Maybe his mind had drifted at that moment, and he’d just been thinking of the sweet substance and happened to say it out loud? You couldn’t be sure … it wouldn’t make sense for him to actually call you that endearment since he hardly knew you past your own name.

But you still wondered.

There was a noise behind you, and you jerked your head around in that direction, expecting to see Austin coming back from his hunting trip.

But it wasn’t your brother.

It was Arthur.

He was fully dressed in his old attire … the same clothes you had found him in that night. A blue long-sleeved shirt with dark brown pants, faded black boots and a large black neckerchief. His chestnut-brown hair was tangled, and his beard had grown out quite a bit from the past two weeks.

He was limping out of the cabin and onto the front porch, an arm clutching his chest as if he were trying to keep himself from falling over.

“Arthur!” You got up from the ground and rushed over to him, forgetting all about your garden. Placing yourself in front of him you stopped him in his tracks, reaching out to try to steady him. “You shouldn’t be out here, you shouldn’t even be standing! Much less walking around.”

Arthur’s blue eyes looked down at you, and for the first time you noticed how truly tall he was. You realized then and there that you’d never seen him at his full height before. The man was practically a giant, standing a full head above you, your own head barely reaching above his wide shoulders.

“I’m fine, Y/N,” that deep southern voice drawled. Arthur closed his eyes in a grimace, letting out a slow breath. “Don’t you worry, now. I just need to take a walk.”

He tried to walk around you but you stepped into his path. “No way, mister, I ain’t letting you take another step away from that couch. Now you turn yourself around and go lie down.”

He smiled at you, but there was no humor in it. “Get outta my way, darlin’,” he said with a bit of venom in his voice, not too harsh but enough to have you back up a little. “I know you mean well, but I ain’t stayin’ on that damn couch any longer.”

Your face grew worried, concerned for his well-being. “You can’t possibly leave now,” you said firmly, “you still need more treatment, or you’re going to get sick again!”

He scoffed, a forceful breath shooting out of his mouth in a huff. “It’s alright, girl,” he said gruffly, “I ain’t got nowhere to go from here, so don’t you fret none.” He lifted his other arm slowly as if it weighed a ton, pointing towards the wide stream. “I’m just gonna head on down to that water over there.”

You realized at that moment that there was going to be no persuading him. Once he had his mind set on something, there was no way he was going to be shaken from it.

With great reluctance you stepped to the side, grabbing the tall walking stick that was propped on the wall, the one you used all the time when you went hiking up into the mountains to search for herbs. “At least take this. I don’t want you falling on your face, you hear?”

Arthur stared at it for a long while then nodded, taking the walking stick with his spare hand, leaning onto it as he started making his way off the porch and towards the large stream that was about sixty feet away.

“Would you like me to come with you?” You asked after him.

He just shook his head and kept going.

You watched him, feeling completely helpless as he continued to grunt in pain with each step he took, slowly getting closer to the water’s edge. He still held his chest with his other arm, his body hunching forward slightly but not stopping.

••••••••••••••••••••••••••••

Arthur felt as though his lungs were going to fall out of his chest, but he couldn’t stay inside that cabin anymore. He needed to get out.

He remembered Y/N telling him that they were above Cerberus Falls, where the hell was that? Y/N had told him it was right before Brandywine Drop.

Finally he reached the side of the wide stream. Looking down, he took in his reflection on the water’s surface. He could see his disheveled hair, his beard had grown out quite a bit, and he looked like a complete mess, but he seemed to be in one piece.

Funny, he thought, he didn’t feel like he was in one piece. He felt as though he was going to fall apart at any moment.

Arthur brought a hand up to his forehead and grunted as a sharp pain went through his head. After several seconds, it finally passed.

He looked down the stream, hearing the roaring sound of waterfalls in the distance. He turned and started heading further down the stream, following the sound.

As he made his way over, he began to lose himself in thought.

He was still here.

Was this real?

Arthur couldn’t begin to fathom the fact that he was still alive, the mere thought of it was overwhelming to him. He tried to remember back to that night again. Damn, why was it so hard?

He almost missed his footing but caught himself on the walking stick Y/N had given him. He was grateful she had offered it to him, it definitely helped keep his ass from falling on the ground. Catching his breath, he started walking again.

Eventually he reached the top of the falls and looked out over the landscape below.

The waterfall was loud as it fell over the edge and landed onto the surface several feet below. Cerberus Falls, Y/N had called it. He almost laughed to himself, was the waterfall named that for the three separate falls it split into? He supposed it made sense, but he’d never heard of the name before.

Arthur looked out further, and noticed the familiar sight. Brandywine Drop. Further still he could see Roanoke Valley after that.

So he was truly in Roanoke Ridge, or just outside of it.

After a moment of taking everything in, he sat down right at the edge of the rocks, letting out a long exhale as he relaxed his entire body and just looked out at the land below.

Maybe this was Heaven?

He almost laughed to himself. No way, he wasn’t a good enough man to make it up there, and even if he was he shouldn’t be feeling any pain, right?

Arthur reached up and rubbed at his chest, trying to ease the aching soreness he felt there.

The air felt cool as it rushed up from below to meet him, the wind blowing his hair back slightly. He took a long, deep breath, then exhaled it out slowly.

He hadn’t been able to do that in so long. It felt so damn good. He took in the sun’s rays, feeling the warmth on his skin. The sound of the rushing water flooded his ears, and he closed his eyes, losing himself in his thoughts.

He thought of the deer again. It had been appearing in his dreams every night since Y/N had saved him. But he couldn’t fathom why, having no idea what it meant.

A haze slowly began to form in his mind, and a dark figure materialized in front of him, taking the solid form of a man. Black hair, a scarred face … Arthur saw his own hands reaching out to the figure in an embrace, placing something on the figure’s head —

John.

Arthur’s eyes shot open, his whole body lurching. He steadied himself on the walking stick as he panted, his entire body hunching forward, suddenly feeling heavy with some kind of invisible weight bearing down on him.

What the hell? Had he been holding his breath? He swallowed hard, closing his eyes as he tried to recall the image again.

The figure reappeared.

John … John Marston.

His brother …

Arthur lifted his head, looking over the vast land into the distance beyond, narrowing his eyes as if he was trying to see where John was. John … his family … where were they? Were they safe? The questions began racing in circles around his mind … then he remembered.

He’d sent John away … right before —

Another sharp pain shot through his head, and Arthur grimaced, bringing his hand up to rub at his temple. He flinched, feeling one of the healing cuts on his face with the tips of his fingers.

Letting out a groan he dropped his hand and gripped the walking stick with both hands, feeling completely lost … in a world that thought he was dead …

A tear rolled down his cheek.

••••••••••••••••••••••••

You’d watched Arthur walk down towards the stream, wanting to make sure that he didn’t get hurt in any way. As soon as he’d reached it, you’d watched as he just seemed to stare down at the water.

Was he looking at his reflection? He lifted his head and looked in the direction of the waterfall.

What was he thinking about?

He started walking down the stream.

Wait, what was he thinking? He couldn’t possibly try to make it any further with the state he was in. You almost felt the need to stop him, but … you were afraid that if you tried he would only fight back, no doubt placing more stress on his body than it was already going through.

You decided to follow him, if only to make sure he was safe.

You were careful to stay in the shadows of the trees as you both gradually made your way over to the waterfall.

Finally, Arthur stopped right at the edge, leaning on the tall walking stick and looking out at the land below. Oh, God, was he going to —

Arthur just sat down slowly, his legs hanging over the edge of the cliff. He kept a grip on the walking stick as he continued to keep his other arm wrapped around his chest.

You approached closer and hid behind another tree, telling yourself you were just keeping an eye on him. Truthfully, though, you were worried for him.

Arthur seemed lost, deep in his own thoughts. He looked as if he were in a great deal of mental pain, and you almost felt the urge to give in and go over to try and comfort him. But you decided it was best to just stay back and give him some space.

After some time passed, Arthur’s upper body suddenly lurched over, nearly falling off the cliff. You lunged forward but stopped yourself as he caught his balance using the walking stick. You squinted to get a closer look … was he crying?

He looked over his shoulder, “What’re you doin’ over there, Y/N?” You were shocked to hear Arthur ask as he looked in your direction, right where you were hiding.

How on Earth did he know you were there? How could he have possibly heard you over the waterfall?

Taking a deep breath, knowing there was no getting out of this, you stepped out from behind the tree and approached him. “I was worried about you, Arthur,” you confessed as you sat down beside him, letting your legs hang off the edge of the cliff as well. “When you started walking toward the falls I wasn’t sure what you were going to do.”

You felt embarrassed, and he let out a rough chuckle. “Did you think I was gonna jump off the cliff, darlin’?”

You felt your cheeks flush, afraid to admit the truth. “Well, I didn’t want anything bad to happen to you. I’m sorry I followed you out here.”

He stared at you then smiled. “You’re alright,” He said, his voice deep. “I don’t blame you.”

You looked over at him. He looked straight ahead, but you noticed the wet trail that ran from his eye and over his cheek. You were almost tempted to reach out and wipe it away, but why?

He let out another grunt of pain, flinching and rubbing his forehead with the tips of his fingers. “What is wrong with me, Y/N?” He asked hoarsely, “Why can I barely remember anythin’?”

You worked up the courage to reach out and rub his back in an effort to try and comfort him. Oh, Lord, you thought. His back was extremely broad and the skin under his blue shirt felt warm, the muscles underneath your hand tensing up.

You shook yourself mentally. This was no time to be thinking that way.

“The medicine and herbs I’ve been treating you with have properties that may cause some side effects to certain parts of the body. They can numb the brain a little bit, effecting your memory. I’ve seen animals act a bit funny on the doses. But don’t worry,” you gave him a smile, “Your memory will start to clear up once we start spacing out your treatments. For now your body needs as much help as it can get so it can fight off the bacteria that’s left.”

“How long will that take?” Arthur asked, but he didn’t look at you. He just kept staring out at the landscape.

“A couple of months is usually the time it’s taken for an animal I’ve treated, but I’m not sure how long it would be for a human. I’m hoping for your sake that it won’t take any longer than it needs to. I’m sure you have family or friends to go back to?”

His body froze under your touch. Had you said something wrong?

“I ain’t sure of that anymore,” he said softly, his voice sounding pained.

Immediately you regretted bringing it up as you noticed another tear roll down his cheek. “Arthur?” You stared at him worriedly.

He just kept looking ahead, a small stiff smile on his face even though his eyes showed immense grief. But of what, you wondered. You turned your head in the direction he was looking, taking in the sights as well.

It felt as if hours had gone by before he spoke to you again. “I was supposed to die … wasn’t I?”

His sudden words had you looking back at him. He was staring at you again, those blue eyes of his red around the corners, as if he was trying to hold his emotions in.

“What you did, what you’re doin’,” Arthur grunted and laid a hand on his chest, “it shouldn’t be possible, should it?”

You didn’t know how to respond as those eyes seemed to stare a hole right through you.

He continued on, “The doctor I saw. He told me it couldn’t be cured.” He rubbed his chest, “I feel like I’ve cheated death … because of you.”

You looked down at your lap, unable to look at him because you weren’t sure of what to say. “I … well … there’s still a lot of work to be done, but — ”

“Why’d you save me?”

His sudden question surprised you, and you looked back up at him. “What?”

His blue eyes narrowed at you. “Why did you save me, Y/N?”

You opened your mouth to respond, but then you realized you had no idea how to reply, not sure if you knew the answer yourself. You thought about it for a moment, trying to form the words in your head. All the while you felt his piercing blue gaze, which wasn’t helping at all.

“I …” you swallowed hard, “You were dying. I couldn’t just leave you there.” There, that should be enough, right? After all, it was the truth, wasn’t it? Maybe?

Arthur was quiet for a moment, then asked under his breath, “Why do you hide it?”

You gave him a confused look, “What do you mean?”

He narrowed his eyes at you intently. “Why do you hide your skills? All this knowledge you have on plants and such.”

You smiled, letting out a small laugh at his wording. “I wouldn’t necessarily call them skills,” you said modestly. “More like a hobby. I’ve never went as far as to treat a human, like I said before. I’ve only ever treated forest or farm animals in my entire life. I haven’t really done anything else.” You looked down at your hands as you fiddled with your fingers nervously. “Honestly I’m surprised that your body has responded so well. And I’m grateful.” You blushed, surprised at those last words that had just slipped out of your mouth.

Arthur chuckled softly. “You’re grateful, huh? “ he asked with humor laced in his voice. A long pause, then he said, “Any other stranger would’ve left me up there, you know.”

You almost gasped at that. “Why on Earth would you think that?”

He just gave a small smile, looking back over the valley. “I ain’t a good man, honey. If you knew who I really was, you’d have never tried to save me.”

You tensed, hearing that word come off his lips again. Honey … You couldn’t say anything in response as you took in his expression, his stiff shoulders, the way he just looked out at the land, almost as if he were staring off into nothingness.

“Arthur … ?”

He didn’t reply.

You reached out again and tapped his shoulder. “Arthur, are you alright?”

His body jerked at your touch as if you’d electrocuted him, and you almost jumped at his unexpected reaction. He turned his gaze toward you and he relaxed, seeming to recognize you. Had he forgotten where he was for a brief moment? Maybe it was the medicine.

“C’mon, Arthur, I need you to come back to the cabin,” you stood and held out your hand in an offering to help him up to his feet, “Your body needs to lie down and rest.”

He looked up at you with disgust at the thought of going back to that couch. But finally he seemed to listen, probably realizing it was for the best. “I guess you’re right.” He grunted in a low voice as he grasped your hand in his big one.

It turned out you needed both your hands and all of your weight to pull him up, but you managed with his help. You offered to let him lean on you but he just shook his head, gesturing at the walking stick. “I’m fine, honey. You got me this, remember?”

He didn’t want to burden you with his weight, you noticed. Smiling, you nodded and turned toward the cabin, walking back slowly by Arthur’s side.

As you made your way over, you couldn’t help but finally ask it.

“Arthur?”

“Yeah?” Oh, God, that heavy southern voice of his sent shivers down your spine.

You took a deep breath, bracing yourself. “Why do you keep calling me ‘honey?’”

— To Be Continued

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If you want to read more or access chapters early, there is plenty more content for you to see! I have an account on Tumblr that I upload my content to first, so please go check it out there: @the-mill-kat
> 
> Any comments or shared thoughts are greatly appreciated, thank you for reading!


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> You save a mysterious man who is dying on a mountain. Finding out he has Tuberculosis, you use your knowledge and skills with herbs and natural remedies to save him from death and help nurse him back to health. As he slowly starts to recover, you can’t help but wonder: Who is this man? Why had you found him the way that you did, beaten and ill? Only time, patience … and perhaps love … will tell.

The silence seemed to stretch on forever.

After a while you started to feel foolish for asking the question, but it was too late. It was out, and you couldn’t take it back. Why in the world did you even ask it? You thought, feeling embarrassed.

As you got closer to the cabin, Arthur still hadn’t said anything, and you were beginning to feel like a total idiot. Unable to take the silence anymore, you turned your head to look over at him.

Arthur was looking down at his feet as he shuffled them across the ground. He was leaning most of his weight on the tall walking stick, trying to keep himself balanced. Was he avoiding the question? Had he even heard you?

“Arthur?”

A small spark of hope shot through you as you thought that there might have been a chance he’d missed what you’d said. Maybe it wasn’t too late, after all, you thought with relief, it was a dumb question, anyways.

But that relief suddenly fled as he looked up at you, and those blue eyes of his sparkled knowingly, a slow grin stretching across his face.

Oh, he’d definitely heard you.

You blushed as you looked away immediately. “I’m sorry, Arthur,” you said, “I mean, not that it bothers me — I just wasn’t sure why … you know … I wasn’t sure why you would be callin’ me that, since we barely know each other and all — “

You heard him let out a soft chuckle, making you blush even harder. “You ain’t got nothin’ to worry about, darlin’,” He said softly, “It’s just cuz of all the honey you’ve been given me, thought it’d be a cute nickname for you.”

Could that damned blush get any hotter? “Oh … alright.” That was all you could say. Was it the answer you were expecting? Was it the truth? Maybe, but you couldn’t be sure.

Finally, you both reached the front porch steps of the cabin, and you turned to face Arthur, “Would you like me to help you up these steps?” You asked, trying to change the subject away from the previous one.

Arthur opened his mouth to reply —

“Y/N!”

Your head whipped around, looking over your shoulder to see Austin waving at you as he rode up towards you on his Bay Roan Ardennes, two large jackrabbits tied to his saddle. “Austin!” you called out. He looked exhausted, his clothes appeared to be messy and even his hair looked out of place, swept in different directions. “How was your trip?”

Austin pulled up right next to you and Arthur and swung off the large horse. He untied the jackrabbits from his saddle and presented them to you with a big grin, holding them both up by their back feet with one hand, “This is what a managed to catch. It ain’t much, I know, but it might last us a few days,” he said, then added “One for me and one for you.”

You looked up at him, baffled at those last words. “What about Arthur?”

Your brother just shrugged, no remorse in his face whatsoever. “If he wants somethin’ to eat he can eat the chicken feed from the stables,” Austin said unapologetically, even though Arthur was standing right next to you. Very well within earshot.

“Austin!” You were completely shocked at his words. Well, not really. But why did Austin insist on being such an asshole to Arthur? What had the man truly ever done to him? You were at your wit’s end.

You were about to say something you would probably later regret when Arthur suddenly reached out his free hand toward Austin.

Your brother visibly flinched slightly, but Arthur just reached over his shoulder and took the carbine repeater from the horse’s saddle.

Oh, God, no, you thought. Please don’t let it end this way. Was he about to kill Austin? Your mind started racing, had your brother been right all along —

Without hesitation, Arthur cocked the gun and swung the rifle through the air with his free hand. He aimed the thing in less than a second, and shot a single round into your raspberry bushes several yards away.

The shot was loud as it rang out in the sky. The Ardennes whinnied in surprise, you’d covered your ears from the loud thunderous crack, and Austin nearly jumped out of his boots.

He glared at Arthur. “What the hell do you think you’re doin’, cowpoke?!”

Arthur gave him a slow grin. “Gettin’ my share, boah,” he said in his low southern drawl, his dark brows drawn down as his blue eyes narrowed at Austin. “Ain’t that what you wanted?”

You and Austin were both speechless as Arthur handed the gun over to you. Not knowing how else to react, you took the carbine, and with that Arthur turned to walk in the direction he’d shot the round. Once he approached the raspberry bushes, he crouched down slowly using the walking stick for balance and reached into the bushes with his spare hand.

He pulled out a large, now dead jackrabbit out from underneath the foliage. As he straightened and made his way back over, you squinted just enough to see a nice, clean bullet hole right in its head. Your jaw dropped, your lips parting.

When Arthur finally approached both of you he held the jackrabbit out to Austin. “This good ’nough, feller?” He asked. His voice was harsh, laced with ice, his face having gone completely dark.

Austin just stood there as he gaped at Arthur, his eyes wide, his lips parted in shock. “How — How the hell did you — what the hell?” He stammered.

You were in awe as well. You’d had no idea that Arthur could handle a gun like that, let alone a large one.

“Where on Earth did you learn to shoot like that, Arthur?” You asked. “And how did you even … how did you even know it was there?”

Arthur turned his gaze to you, that face of his softening as a small smile stretched his lips. “Sure was makin’ a lotta noise while it was eatin’ your berries, Y/N.”

Your jaw almost dropped at his answer. Just how good was his hearing? If you didn’t know any better, you would’ve sworn it was almost like he had an eagle’s sense of his surroundings … You looked over at the raspberry bushes, completely stunned, unable to fathom what had just happened.

Who was this man, truly?

“You gonna take this or not, boah?” Arthur’s deep voice snapped you out of your thoughts and you looked back over to see Austin reach out a shaky hand to take the jackrabbit from Arthur.

“I’m … I-I…” Austin stuttered, tripping over his words. “I can’t believe … where- how did you learn to shoot like that?”

Arthur just huffed, “Years of practice.” He said hoarsely. He cleared his throat, then he brought his arm up to his mouth and started coughing.

Immediately you forgot everything else except for his health. You handed the carbine over to your brother who took it. Grabbing Arthur’s arm, you urged him toward the cabin. “C’mon, Arthur, you need to lie down.”

Arthur continued to cough even harder as he let you lead him up the steps and through the front door, all the while the fit having taken over. His body must’ve reached its limit, you realized. You sat him down on the large couch and went to grab your supplies, bringing them over to him. You handed him a dry cloth and he accepted it, giving you a grateful smile before coughing into it, his entire body shaking hard.

Quickly you prepped the syringe and cleaned off his inner arm with some alcohol. “Try to stay still, Arthur,” you said softly, rubbing his shoulder with your spare hand to try and get him to relax. As soon as his body settled down for a couple seconds you pushed the needle into his skin, pressing the plunger down until the barrel was completely empty. Pulling it out you patched him up and grabbed the glass of water and two pre-crushed herbs.

“Here, Arthur, I need you to take these, they should help ease your breathing.” You said urgently, holding the herbs and water out to him in each hand.

He stared at what you offered for a few seconds and then took them, placing the herbs in his mouth. He brought the glass up to his lips and drank from it until it was empty. As soon as he finished he closed his eyes and laid down on the couch, resting his head onto the pillow.

You took the empty glass from his hand and placed it on the nightstand. You snatched the thick wool blanket from the end of the couch and laid it back over his body, tucking it underneath him so he was comfortable.

As minutes passed his coughing slowly started to diminish, until finally he was breathing evenly again.

After a little while you reached out and rubbed his shoulder in an effort to ease him. “How are you feeling?”

Arthur opened his eyes and that blue gaze looked at you gratefully. “Much better, honey. Thanks.” Then he closed his eyes again with a low moan.

You smiled and nodded, then stood up to clean and put away the supplies. It would probably be best for him to stay off his feet for the rest of the day, you thought. But at least he got some of what he’d needed. You truly couldn’t blame Arthur for wanting to get out of the cabin, but at the same time you really needed him to take it easy so that his body could continue fighting off the tuberculosis bacteria that was left.

Austin walked into the sitting room and looked down at Arthur, then up at you, “He feelin’ alright?” He asked.

You nodded. “Yes, please don’t bother him. He needs to rest.”

Your brother’s mouth twitched into a smile. “Alright, well … I’ll go ahead and prepare the meat then.” His voice was much softer in tone, as if he were thinking about something.

“You okay, Austin?” You asked, meeting his eyes.

He just smiled and nodded, “Yeah, Y/N, I just … well, it’s nothin’. I’ll be outside workin’ on the game.” With that he turned and walked out the front door, closing it gently behind him.

You looked at the closed door, feeling surprised. It was the first time Austin had been in the same room without throwing any kind of insult or negative statement at Arthur. Was your brother actually starting to change the way he thought about him? Was it because of the gun incident?

Brushing that thought away, you continued cleaning the equipment. Once you were finally finished, you washed your hands and walked back into the sitting room.

You glanced at the honey pot on the nightstand. He needed to take more, you thought, but you would wait until he was awake again.

The cabin was quiet, and you looked over at Arthur, taking in what you saw. He was completely relaxed now, fast asleep, the medicine having gone to work throughout his entire body now. He almost looked like a completely different person, his face no longer hard, those features having gone completely soft.

Letting out a sigh of content, you grabbed a book off the shelf over the fireplace and sat in the spare sitting chair across from the couch. This way you could continue to keep an eye on Arthur for as long as need be.

Later that evening …  
You heard a low groan and looked up from the chapter you were reading.

Arthur was moving, his arms and legs twisting underneath the blanket. You closed the book instantly and placed it on the nightstand next to you. Standing up you went over and knelt at his side. You kept your voice in a soft whisper, so as not to disturb him too much, “Arthur?”

Arthur’s dark brows drew down tight as his entire face grimaced. He let out a grunt and opened his eyes. That blue stare looked up and seemed to recognize you. He smiled, “Hey, honey,” he murmured, his deep voice sounding rough.

You returned his smile with one of your own, “You’re awake. How did you sleep?”

He squeezed his eyes shut, scratching his neck, “Ain’t too sure. Think I might’ve slept like a dog.” He sat up slowly and raised his arms up over his head, stretching his entire upper torso. You found yourself unable to help staring briefly at his muscles as his blue shirt splayed tight across them from his movements. 

“So,” you said, interrupting your own thoughts, “would you mind if I listen to your heart?” Okay, that sounded a bit weird, so you added “I need to listen to see if there are any abnormalities.”

He shrugged, “I guess so,” he said, his southern drawl hitching slightly as he cracked his neck, “do what you need to do.”

Seriously, his deep voice was going to be the end of you, you thought. Nodding, you stood up and grabbed your stethoscope and other tools from your desk and brought them over. Putting on the stethoscope you placed the disk on his chest. Being this close to him felt so strange, and you never managed to get over the warm feeling you got every time, “Okay, Arthur,” you said, “please take a deep breath for me?”

His chest rose and fell as he took in a large breath and let it out. You listened to his heart for any hiccups, but thankfully there were none. Moving the disk to where his lungs were you listened to each one individually. “More deep breaths, please?”

He obliged as his chest rose and fell again a few more times. His lungs were sounding so much better, you thought, they were taking in and pushing out air with much more ease. There was no doubt that the bacteria was dying off and the tissue was starting to grow back what it could. “Do you feel any pain right now?”

He looked down at you, “Not at the moment,” he said gruffly. He winced. “Just a little bit, sometimes.”

You placed your stethoscope aside, trading it for a tongue depressor. “Say ‘ah’ for me, please?”

Arthur obliged as he parted his lips and let you place the stick on his tongue. You examined the back of his throat, searching closely for anything out of the ordinary. There was a bit of redness in the back, probably an irritation result from the earlier coughing episode, but other than that everything looked good.

“Well, Arthur,” you said as you sat back, placing the tool into the trash bin at the foot of the couch, “Your heart and lungs sound pretty good. There’s a bit of soreness in your throat but that should clear up soon, as long as there are no more fits. I think you’ll be able to start movin’ about again with no problems very soon.”

Arthur rubbed at his chest, clearing his throat as he looked down at his lap. What was he thinking about? You wondered, but there was no time to ponder on that though. You grabbed the honey pot and lifted the lid. You heard Arthur clear his throat and you looked back up at him. “Is something wrong?’

He shook his head, an amused expression on his face. “No, honey.”

You blushed. Turning away so he didn’t see it you snatched the spoon up and handed it and the pot over to him without looking at him. “Here,” you said quickly, “you know what to do.”

You felt him take the pot and spoon from your hands, and you stood up to put away your book, trying to make yourself look busy until the blush was gone.

Out of the corner of your eye you saw him take the spoonfuls of honey into his mouth. “I still can’t believe this,” he said as he finished up and placed the pot and spoon down, “I still can’t … I really don’t see how I’m still here.”

His tone sounded tortured, you thought sadly. What on Earth had happened to him before you found him?

What kind of life had he led?

That thought brought another, and you suddenly remembered his satchel. “Oh!”

Your sudden outburst made Arthur jerk, looking up at you with surprise. “I’m sorry,” you said, “I just remembered somethin’.” You got up and raced over to your desk in your office, unlocking the bottom drawer.

“What is it?” Arthur called out.

Pulling the satchel out from the drawer and closing it you held the small brown bag up for him to see as you came back over. “My brother found this on one of his huntin’ trips near where we found you … ,” you paused, then added “I saw your name on the first page.”

At his questioning look you quickly added, “I swear I didn’t look any further, Arthur. I was goin’ to respect your privacy. I just — I just wanted to see if it was yours.” You approached the couch and held the satchel out to him.

Arthur stared at it for a long moment until he slowly took it with a shaking hand. Those blue eyes held so much emotion as he stared at it that you couldn’t help but wonder what was running through his mind.

He opened the satchel and pulled out the journal. His breath hitched as he stared at it, running a gentle hand over the front cover. “This … you found this?”

You nodded, but he didn’t look up from the journal, so you said aloud, “My brother did, yes. I kept it locked in my desk for safe-keepin’ until you were feelin’ better.”

He lifted the front cover and flipped through the first page and your eyes widened, unable to help but notice a two-page drawing that looked like some kind of camp. After a minute or two he continued flipping through the pages, his eyes looking more and more pained as he progressed through the journal. You could see words written down on some of them, except you refused to read them out of respect for his privacy. But those drawings. He stopped on some of them and you were absolutely astonished, unable to help but look.

Suddenly he closed the journal and placed it on the nightstand. He bent forward, elbows on his knees. Placing his face in his hands, he started rubbing his forehead with the tips of his fingers. He looked almost ruined, completely overwhelmed. His display of emotion almost had you regretting giving him back his satchel, but what else could you have possibly done with it? Maybe you could’ve waited a little longer, but he had the right to know. It was his property, after all.

Several moments passed and he didn’t move, his face still hidden in his hands. After a little while longer you decided to speak, using a gentle tone so that you didn’t aggravate him in any way. “Arthur … I noticed several sketches in there … did you draw those?” You were trying to change the subject in order to draw his mind away from whatever dark place it had gotten sucked into.

He didn’t respond right away, nor did he move at all, his entire body tight for several minutes.

Finally, he brought his hands away, placing them at his sides where he gripped the edges of the couch, his knuckles turning nearly white. He looked down at the floor, avoiding your gaze. “Yes, I drew them,” he said roughly, his voice nearly choking. His eyelids had gone red, his entire face set in a hard line.

“I didn’t mean to see them,” you whispered gently.

“No, you’re alright,” Arthur said in a rough tone, waving his hand through the air as if dismissing your apology. “I’m just thinkin’.”

You nodded and waited, giving him whatever space he needed to work through whatever was running through his head.

After a while he lifted a hand and rubbed hard at his eyes. “I’m sorry, I ... just gotta lot on my mind right now.”

You nodded, “I completely understand, Arthur, and I’m sorry if that journal brought back any painful memories. I shouldn’t have given it back so soon while you’re still sick.”

“No,” he interjected, “I’m glad you did.”

Was he really, though? You thought. Whatever was in that journal seemed to be putting him in a lot of mental anguish. You wanted so badly to help him think about something else, so you decided to bring up a lighter subject. “Where did you learn to draw?”

Arthur let out a harsh grunt at your question and shrugged, his heavy voice carrying a slightly bare tone to it, “I just look at what I see and put it on paper,” He scratched at his jaw, “I don’t really see that much in ’em, though.”

You almost gaped at his modesty. “They’re really beautiful, Arthur.”

He didn’t look at you as he just nodded and gave a small smile, though it didn’t reach his eyes. “Thanks,” he said under his breath.

You gave a comforting smile, “You have an amazin’ talent, Arthur,” you told him gently, then added “if you ever want to draw somethin’, I have some pencils on my desk. You’re free to use them.” You patted his shoulder as you stood up. “I’m goin’ to go outside for a while and talk to my brother. Will you be alright?”

Arthur still didn’t look at you as he just gave another small nod.

You looked down at him sympathetically. “Alright, I’ll be back soon.” You turned away and walked toward the front door. Reaching it, you looked back over your shoulder at him one more time. His upper body was hunched over once again, his face in his hands.

He was clearly hurting, you knew, but you had no idea what else you could do other than give him some space and time alone. You stepped out and shut the door softly behind you.

Stepping out onto the front porch, the late evening air hit you like a gust of wind. You took a deep breath of it, letting the cool air settle your nerves as you looked around. The evening was quiet, the sun having just disappeared behind the distant mountains in the West. Crickets were chirping as if greeting the night that approached.

Austin was sitting on a stump over near the stream. It looked like he was working on something, but you couldn’t see what it was since he was facing away from you.

Before going over to him, you decided to go to the stables to check on the horses. It was a small building surrounded by fencing to the side of the house. There was just enough room in the fence to let the horses run around whenever they wanted to, about two-and-half acres of wide grass with a few trees spotted here and there. Since the cabin was located in the woods, several trees stood tall both in and around the stables just as well as the cabin. Your brother had cut several of them down a couple years ago in order to allow more room for the horses, but he’d left some up to provide shade for them as well.

You walked into the stables and saw the white Shire and Bay Roan Ardennes in their own stalls. They were both munching on the fresh hay that was no doubt Austin’s doing. You checked on the other animals, looking to see the goats and chickens in their own pens. They were still up and about, wandering around doing their business.

The white Shire lifted her head and came over to you, poking its head out over the stall gate to nudge your shoulder.

“Hey there, Lily,” you said in greeting, turning to face her and reaching a hand up to stroke her muzzle, “How’re you doin’?”

She whinnied softly in response.

You’d had Lily for 10 years, and she absolutely adored you, as you did her. Your father had given her to you for your 20th birthday and you’d named her after your favorite flower, the white lily. It had been the first plant you’d ever grown, with the help of your mother. Lily was absolutely magnificent and extremely loyal, and she’d seen you through many hardships in you life.

And if not for her, you wouldn’t have been able to save Arthur.

Giving her a final pat on her neck, you let out a breath, “Well, girl, I think it’s time to go to bed, don’t you? You rest well.” Lily shook her head up and down as if agreeing with you, then she turned away to resume eating her supper.

You turned to face the Ardennes, “Well, Butch, hope you’re ready for bed, too?” You asked him. He raised his head to look at you, letting out a snort.

Butch was a war horse, built for bravery and strength. Just like Lily, your father had given him to your brother for his own 20th birthday. You were both two years apart, so being 18 you had been slightly jealous of him until you’d gotten Lily. Butch would follow Austin anywhere. The big horse wasn’t really attached to you, but he recognized you as a friend.

You gave a small nod at him. “Alrighty, then. Y’all both have a good night.” You waved to both of them as you walked out of the stables and followed the dirt trail leading toward the small river. On your way you noticed the three skinned jackrabbits hanging off of individual hooks from one of the trees’ low branches. So Austin had finished the butchering job a while ago.

You brother was still sitting on the stump, and from this angle you could barely make out what he was working on. He was cleaning his carbine repeater, running a rag up and down the barrel of the gun.

You walked over to him, “Hey, Austin,” you kept your tone low so as not to startle him.

Austin looked up over his shoulder at you. He smiled and propped the gun against the stump as he stood up. “Hey, sister. Everything alright?” He asked, turning to face you.

“Yes, everything’s fine,” you answered. “Don’t worry, continue what you were doin’.” You gestured at the repeater.

He shook his head. “Nah, I was just finished anyways. So … ” he reached a hand around his head to rub at the back of his neck. “How’s Arthur?”

Your eyes widened. It was the first time Austin had called Arthur by his name. Before this it had always been ‘cowpoke’ or some kind of other insult. Was your brother finally warming up to him? “He’s a bit troubled right now … I gave him back his satchel, and he saw his journal.”

Austin shook his head, seeming empathetic. “Probably has a lotta memories in there.”

“Austin?”

“Hm?”

You shut your eyes briefly, bracing yourself for his answer to your next question, “Do you still hate him?”

Arthur’s eyes filled with amusement as he smiled, “Maybe a little,” he teased.

You rolled your eyes, unable to hold back a small laugh as you smiled back in return.

His grin grew wider at your reaction, then he gestured with his hand, pointing at the repeater. “He’s gotta hell of a shot.”

You let out another laugh, “Now you’re complimenting him? Where is Austin and what have you done with him?”

Austin chuckled, “Don’t get me wrong. I still sorta hate that man, especially after showin’ off like that.” He scratched his cheek, a habit you knew he had whenever he got embarrassed about something.

You tsked at him playfully, “You did kinda ask for it, though. I mean, really, Austin. Chicken feed?”

He chuckled, “You’re right, Y/N,” he admitted, “I’m sorry for saying that. It was stupid of me.”

You shook your head, “I’m not the one you need to apologize to, Austin.”

Austin let out a long sigh, seeming exasperated. “Men don’t apologize to each other,” he stated, his voice firm as if what he’d just said was a fact.

You narrowed your eyes at him.

“But I guess I can try talkin’ to him sometime.” He added, rubbing the back of his neck again.

“It wouldn’t kill you to try,” you said encouragingly. You reached out and patted his upper arm in an effort to comfort your brother’s silly ego.

“Don’t be too sure of that,” Austin replied, his voice light in tone. “I suppose I should make sure all the animals are settled in for the night.” He turned around, picked up his gun, and started heading over to the stables.

You smiled to yourself. Your brother seemed to finally be coming around. Even though he wouldn’t outwardly admit it, you could tell he was starting to like Arthur.

Funny how guns could bring men together sometimes, you thought with a small smile.

\-- To Be Continued

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope you enjoyed this. Any comments or shared thoughts are greatly appreciated, thank you for reading!


	5. Chapter 5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> You save a mysterious man who is dying on a mountain. Finding out he has Tuberculosis, you use your knowledge and skills with herbs and natural remedies to save him from death and help nurse him back to health. As he slowly starts to recover, you can’t help but wonder: Who is this man? Why had you found him the way that you did, beaten and ill? Only time, patience … and perhaps love … will tell.

One week later …  
The large male deer stood in front of him again, only this time it was in the middle of a shallow river, bending its head down to drink from it.

Arthur was standing right on the water’s edge facing toward the animal, the solid ground he stood on feeling soft beneath his boots. On the other side of the river he could see an endless, wide-open field of nothing but large grassy hills.

A heavy storm billowed in the distance beyond the land, thunder rumbling, causing the ground to shake beneath him. As he watched the dark clouds, they appeared to be drawing closer towards him and the deer.

Looking over his shoulder, Arthur could see nothing but heavy fog behind him, unable to see what lied beyond it. He turned back to look at the deer again, but it still hadn’t seemed to notice that he was there.

Arthur tried to move, but his body refused to obey. It was as if his mind were completely detached from his body. What the hell was going on?

Suddenly he started to feel like he was floating, and Arthur looked down to notice that the fog had begun to wrap around his feet, slowly engulfing his entire body as it crept up his legs, then his torso, until it was all but surrounding him. His body continued to be lifted from the ground as the fog started to pull him into it.

Just as he could barely see the deer through the mist, it lifted its head and looked at him again. But this time, its eyes were brown … almost like —

John’s.

Arthur’s heart stopped.

He reached out, starting to struggle against the fog’s hold, trying to stay with the deer. He tried to shout as loud as he could, “John!” His heart suddenly began to beat fast, the beats loud like drums in his ears. The more he fought the fog, the faster and louder they got.

The creature turned away, as if it hadn’t heard him, and it started making its way to the other side of the river, toward the storm.

“John!”

With the loudest and final beat, lightning struck between them, the sharp light blinding his vision.

Arthur snapped awake, breathing hard.

Sunlight was shining directly on his face through the window and he blinked hard, turning away so that the rays wouldn’t blind him.

Another dream, he thought, but this one had been different. Before this he’d been in the forest every time, with the deer always appearing near him. This time though … the location had been completely different. Two sides split by a body of water, and the deer … it had had John’s eyes.

Arthur groaned as he lifted a hand to rub at his face, trying to clear his mind. What the hell were these dreams trying to tell him, he wondered, or were they just a bunch of nonsense? He guessed the latter for the sake of his own sanity, what little was left of it. He couldn’t allow himself to dwell on something like that when it probably meant nothing.

He sat up slowly, the blanket that had been covering him falling away and landing on the floor as he moved his legs over to hang off the side of the couch. He looked around at the cabin in an effort to remind himself where he was, taking in the sitting room, the fireplace, the door to Y/N’s office, the kitchen door across the room, the hallway over to the left that led to the bedrooms. He couldn’t see Y/N or Austin anywhere, so they were probably outside.

Nearly a whole month had passed since he’d been saved from that mountain and taken in, and by nothing short of a miracle he was still here … alive. It was still very difficult for him to grasp. He brought a hand up to rub at his chest. Over the last few days he’d stopped feeling any more pain there, his breathing barely taking any effort at all now.

And it was all thanks to Y/N, he thought. He smiled to himself, thinking about her. He didn’t deserve all that she’d done for him, and he knew it. Not after all the horrible things he’d done throughout his life.

His memories had been coming back together piece by piece ever since the herb and medicine doses had started being spaced out over the last week, and he couldn’t help but feel more lost from every memory that came back to him.

He remembered the gang. He remembered the friends he’d lost, all the years of his life he’d been with them.

They were all gone now …

He’d spent so much of his life in a gang he considered his family above everything else.

He thought about his old friends, wondering where they were now.

He thought about Dutch, how he’d spent so many years of his life staying loyal to him, doing all the dirty work he was told to do. He’d given him all he had ... only to have the man leave him behind on that mountain in the end.

Then there was John, his own family, Abigail and their son Jack.

John had struggled for so long to accept who he was, and Arthur had sent him away, giving him a chance to lead a normal life with them. He’d deserved it more than anyone he knew.

He’d sacrificed his own life to save John’s in order for him to live the life Arthur never had.

Arthur remembered giving over his father’s hat to him before he’d left, never imagining that he would ever make it out alive.

Where was John now? Were he and his family safe?

Arthur lowered his head, grimacing at the mental pain and loss he felt. He couldn’t bear to think of John not having made it out alive. The fact that the satchel had been left behind was worrisome, had John dropped it by accident while he’d fled?

Arthur raised his head and looked over on the nightstand where his journal sat. Over the last several days he’d worked up the courage to read it, trying to remember every single thing he could from his past. There were so many entries he’d marked down about the things he’d seen, the places he’d been, the things he’d done. All those sketches … that journal was so overwhelming to look at each time he opened up the damn thing.

He reached out to grab it, opening it up to the last page he’d done. The entry that had been meant for John and his family.

Arthur took a deep breath, and couldn’t help the tear that escaped from his eye as he thought of his past, the tear leaving a wet trail behind on his cheek. He sniffed hard and shook his head.

You ain’t like this, he thought to himself. Really, he needed to believe that John had made it out of there, and that him and his family were now somewhere safe, away from the world’s troubles, living in peace.

Flipping the page over, he stared at the blank page, then wondered … where the hell was he going to go from here?

A loud banging started up, like a heavy hammer on wood. Arthur raised his head and looked out the window. It sounded like it was coming from outside, but from where he was sitting all he could see were trees through the thick glass.

He closed his journal and placed it back down on the nightstand.

Bracing his hands on his knees, Arthur pushed himself to his feet. He nearly lost his balance as he stood, but gained it back quickly by throwing his arms out to steady himself. He needed to start moving around soon, he thought. His body was starting to become soft. He’d gotten up several times during the past week to move around, but he really needed to do some kind of hard physical labor to get back into shape again. There was no doubt he could find something to do.

He ran a hand through his hair as he walked over to the mirror above the fireplace. Looking into it, he scratched at his thick beard. It was getting really long, and he really needed to trim it. Was there a razor lying around? Y/N’s brother had to have a few somewhere. He hated to rummage through their things, but he’d feel much better if his beard was shorter.

He made his way down the small hallway and opened one of the doors, only to be met with what was definitely Y/N’s bedroom. A single small bed sat on the other side of the room between two windows, floral-patterned bedding covering it. He quickly closed the door before he saw anything else, his face nearly heating. He’d mistaken the wrong door, clearly.

Turning around he tried the other door, and it was a small washing room. Here we go, he thought, spotting a razor on a small shelf below a large round mirror. He closed the door behind him and got to work on trimming his beard til it was about a third of an inch long, just how he preferred it.

Once he was finished he cleaned up and replaced everything back to where it had been before.

He walked back into the sitting room and picked the blanket up off the floor, folding it up and setting it over the back of the couch. Feeling useless, the least he could do was clean up after himself.

The banging noise still continued, and Arthur looked over at the window again. Walking over to it, he peered through to see what the source of the noise was. He spotted Austin pounding away at a fence post over by the stables, forcing the thing into the ground with a large hammer.

Arthur moved his head around, trying to see if he could spot Y/N anywhere until he finally saw her. She was in her garden, on her hands and knees working on her plants. She looked totally engrossed in her work, seeming not to pay any mind to anything around her but her garden.

He smiled to himself as he watched her. That brave woman had risked so much to save his life. She had such a caring heart, and if not for her he wouldn’t be here.

When she’d asked why he called her honey, he hadn’t been expecting the question, so his stupid self had given her only half of an answer. In all honesty it was a cute nickname for her, but he wasn’t sure if she was ready to hear the real reason. Hell, he wasn’t even sure if he was ready, he thought, feeling stupid.

Even though he’d asked her several days ago why she’d saved him, he had a feeling she hadn’t been entirely truthful with her response. He wasn’t even sure if she knew the answer herself. So they were both on equal ground, so to speak.

He still didn’t understand why she’d gone through so much to help him, a stranger, recover from his tuberculosis.

That thought brought another. The disease in him was dying, and he could feel the huge difference all throughout his body. He still had small coughing fits here and there, but they had gotten shorter and less painful over time, and there was no longer any blood. His body seemed to be successfully fighting off the bacteria with the help of all the medicine and herbs Y/N had given to him over the last few weeks.

Arthur stared at Y/N for a bit longer, and he couldn’t help but admit to himself how pretty she actually was. If he were honest with himself, he’d actually noticed how beautiful she was the first time he’d opened his eyes and seen her face, right before he’d given her his name.

He allowed himself to examine her features, taking her in. Her body was formed so nicely from all the physical work she did. Her thick hair was tied in a loose bun to keep it from getting dirty, her skin tanned from being out in the sun so much. And she was wearing jeans and a blouse along with leather boots instead of a dress.

Come to think of it, he thought, he’d never seen her in a dress. Did she even own any? He shook his head, clearing that thought. Why did that even matter? It wasn’t like he cared what sort of clothes she wore. Though he did have to admit ... she did look damn good in the clothes she wore.

Arthur stepped back from the window and took a long breath, letting it out slowly. He shook himself mentally, trying to clear his thoughts. He needed to find something to do. But what?

He pondered for a minute until he looked at his journal. His eyes skimmed over to the desk in the office where the pencils that Y/N had mentioned to him were lying.

He rubbed at his jaw with his thumb and let out a sigh, trying to decide what to do.

After a long moment of thinking he finally gave in. He walked over to grab one of the pencils then came back into the sitting room. Heading over to the front door he snatched his journal up on the way and went outside.

Damn, the sun felt so good on his skin, he thought as he stepped out onto the porch, quiet so as not to disturb Y/N or Austin from their work. There was a bench swing over to the side and he went over to sit on it. It faced toward the garden so he was able to watch Y/N as she worked.

She definitely did look lovely, even covered in dirt, he thought with a small grin. He could tell that she really loved her plants by the way she treated them with those gentle hands. The same gentle hands that had worked so very hard to save him from death.

Arthur looked closer to see what she was working on. It was a Yarrow, a pretty one, too, it’s red petals bright in color and looking very healthy.

Opening his journal, he flipped to a blank page and brought the tip of his pencil to the paper. He didn’t even know if he could still draw after everything his mind and body had been through, but he damn well would try.

He lifted his head to look at Y/N several times to take in every detail as he started sketching.

••••••••••••••••••••••••••••

You straightened and wiped at the sweat on your brow with the back of your hand, taking a moment to catch your breath. Your back was starting to hurt from being bent over for so long, but you didn’t care at the moment, only thinking about the plants and what they needed in order to thrive. They might as well have been your own children with all the time and effort you put into them, you thought with a small laugh to yourself.

Bending down again you dug at the dirt with your fingers, loosening the soil, then grabbed the large watering pail and sprinkled the cool water onto the loose ground.

“There ya go, fellas,” you said to the plants. It was a bit silly, sure, but you liked to believe that talking to them helped them to grow even more healthy and beautiful.

As you pruned a few more leaves, you started to feel like you were being watched.

You looked over your shoulder and saw Arthur sitting on the porch swing. You smiled to yourself, glad that he was feeling well enough to come outside.

It looked like he was working on something, and you looked closer to see what it was, it appeared that he was scribbling something in his journal with one of your pencils. It made you feel happy to know that he had taken you up on your offer.

Then you wondered what he was working on in that journal, and curiosity got the better of you. He appeared to be distracted, so you stood quickly and snuck around the back of the cabin.

••••••••••••••••••••••••••

Arthur looked up from his sketch to take in more details, and noticed that Y/N was gone. What the hell? He looked around, wondering where she’d went.

•••••••••••••••••••••••••••

You snuck up behind Arthur, trying to be as quiet as you possibly could. He’d noticed you’d disappeared, and you knew he had excellent hearing, so you had to move quickly. Approaching from behind him you looked over his shoulder to see what he’d been working on.

Your heart stopped.

It was a drawing of you in your garden as you’d been working on your flowers … it was absolutely gorgeous.

“That’s so beautiful, Arthur,” you complimented softly.

Arthur jerked his head around, snapping his journal closed. “Y/N! You shouldn’t sneak up on a man like that,” he said teasingly, “You could get yourself in trouble.”

You let out a laugh, “Don’t be silly, Arthur, now let me look at that drawin’ again?”

Arthur lowered his eyes, as if he were thinking about your request and whether he wanted to deny it.

“Please?” You gave him a playful sad look, trying to appeal to his soft side.

He let out a groan-like huff and reluctantly opened the journal back to the drawing, holding it out for you to see.

You stepped around the bench and sat down next to him, taking the journal into your hands to get a better look.

The style was simple, yet detailed at the same time. The scribbles were heavy and light in certain areas, giving off the lighting and shading effects. He’d sketched out your garden and the trees in the background, and the lines of you body appeared to have been done with great care.

“Arthur, this is stunnin’, the way you draw … you have so much talent!”

Arthur reached an arm up to rub at the back of his neck, his expression looking shy, “Yeah, well, thought I might find somethin’ to do. Gets a bit borin’ in there.” He said with a deep chuckle.

You smiled up at him.

He returned the smile shyly, then he looked over at your garden. “So how long you been into plants?” He asked, trying to change the subject.

You turned your gaze to your garden, a small smile stretching your lips. “Pretty much my whole life,” you answered. “My mother actually got me into them when I was only four years old. At first I fell in love with flowers because of their beautiful colors, the way they all looked so different from each other.”

You could feel Arthur’s warm blue gaze on you, and you continued.

“I told my mother that I wanted to try to grow my own flower, and she helped me plant and nurture my first one, a white lily, from a seedling. When it finally bloomed, I was so happy. My mother told me that white lilies were known to protect other plants around them from diseases … ”

Out of the corner of your eye, you saw Arthur straighten. “Is that right? Well, fancy that.”

You nearly laughed, realizing the double meaning your words actually had. “Yeah, well, after it became the first flower I grew, it also became my favorite. I even named my horse Lily. Unfortunately, I’ve never found any in this area, so I’m not able to grow any more.” You sighed, “But when I think about them, I think about my mother … all the love she had to offer for everyone.”

You felt tears welling in your eyes and you covered your face with your hands, “I’m sorry, I don’t mean to — ”

You felt a large hand on your shoulder and your breath hitched. Arthur was trying to comfort you.

“Don’t be, Y/N. You’re alright, just breathe ... ” his deep voice was soothing, and it calmed you down a little.

But then anger started simmering deep in your gut, and you couldn’t help the fury that began to boil in you. “She would still be alive if it wasn’t for them,” you spat out the last word.

Arthur's hand moved to your back, running it up and down. “Who?”

Your eyes narrowed at the horrible memory. “They came during the night. It was just me and Mother, we’d been preparing supper for when Father and Austin came back, but then — ” you took in a shaky breath, “I heard a window break, and next thing I knew there were gunshots. There were three of them … my mother tried to fight them off, but they’d held me at gunpoint, and she’d surrendered. They tied us up and then interrogated her.

“They’d been looking for something, just shouting nonstop at her, but then ... I don’t know why it happened, one of them .. they just shot her,” You squeezed your eyes shut, trying to keep the tears from falling, you voice cracking. “My brother came through the door with a gun, and they fled.” You nearly growled the next words, “Those damn outlaws!”

Arthur’s hand froze on your back, but you barely noticed it as rage began running through your entire body. “Those men killed her,” you said through gritted teeth, tears finally escaping your eyes. “I hate them, I hate all of them, every outlaw out there, I hate them with every part of my being!” You wiped at your eyes with the back of your hands.

Arthur’s body seemed to tense, and you raised your head to look up at him, suddenly worried for his health. “Are you alright, Arthur?”

His expression looked strange, but he just shook his head. “It’s nothin’.” He said, giving you a small smile of reassurance.

But his eyes told a different story …

“I’m so sorry for what you went through, honey,” Arthur said softly, “I know what it’s like to lose the ones you love.”

— To Be Continued

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Want to see the White Lily Arthur drew for you? Check it out @the-mill-kat!
> 
> If you want to read more or access chapters early, there is plenty more content for you to see! I have an account on Tumblr that I upload my content to first, so please go check it out there: @the-mill-kat
> 
> Any comments or shared thoughts are greatly appreciated, thank you for reading!


	6. Chapter 6

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> You save a mysterious man who is dying on a mountain. Finding out he has Tuberculosis, you use your knowledge and skills with herbs and natural remedies to save him from death and help nurse him back to health. As he slowly starts to recover, you can’t help but wonder: Who is this man? Why had you found him the way that you did, beaten and ill? Only time, patience … and perhaps love … will tell.

I hate them, every outlaw out there.

The words rang in his head, and Arthur didn’t know how to react. He was almost nervous by the tension he felt rising between them now, but the feeling was only one-sided on his part.

She was completely unaware of the conflicting thoughts he was having now from those words. She had taken him in, nursed him back to health, and all the while she had never known who he was … what he was.

Murderers, thieves … outlaws. They had stolen her mother from her, someone close to her heart. Was he any different from them?

He understood her pain, the loss she felt for having lost someone she loved.

Not knowing how to react or what else to do, he continued rubbing his hand up and down her back in an effort to try and comfort her. “I’m truly sorry, Y/N. No one deserves to go through somethin’ like that.”

She let out a little sniff as she raised her head to look at him, wiping at her eyes and cheeks to get rid of the wet tears that had escaped. “You … You said you know how it feels to lose someone, Arthur.” Her sad eyes looked up at his, “Who did you lose?”

Arthur tensed.

He hadn’t been prepared for that question.

He was unable to figure out how to answer her, not without revealing himself and who he truly was.

He’d lost so many people. His entire gang, his family, either lost or dead. But he couldn’t tell her about any of them. He couldn’t reveal the people he’d lost without risking her recognizing any of those names and finding out who he’d been. He wasn’t sure if she even actually knew any of them, but he didn’t want to take that chance.

Besides, it wasn’t like he could’ve gone back to that life now. His old life was gone, and there was nowhere else to go.

But still … what the hell could he possibly say?

Now that he knew what she’d gone through, there was no damn way he was going to let her know what he’d been. She’d been through enough, there was no sense in allowing her to find out who he truly was, all the things he’d done. After all the care she had shown him she deserved to know him as a normal man.

So that’s who he was going to be.

He thought about Hosea, he thought about Dutch, he thought about the rest of the gang. He thought about Charles, of Lenny, of John …

Arthur lowered his eyes to the ground, emotion nearly tearing through him. “I lost a family,” his voice was hoarse, nearly gravel in tone, “they were very near and dear to me. Though we wasn’t related by blood, we stood by each other, keepin’ each other safe,” he lowered his lids, memories of them flooding him. “We did everythin’ to protect one another, no matter what damn mess we got ourselves in.” He could feel Y/N’s stare on him, and he turned his head to face her. Her expression was sympathetic, her eyes watering all over again. For him.

“I’m so sorry, Arthur,” her voice was cracked, as if she felt the same feelings that he did for the ones he’d lost.

He gave her a small smile. “I ain’t got no one now since you saved me from that mountain.”

It wasn’t an accusation, it was just the truth. He just wanted to let her know where he was in life now. Hell, he wasn’t even sure himself. His friends, any of them that were possibly left, he had no doubt they thought he was dead.

And John.

Arthur thought about the deer from his dream, about the fact that it had had John’s eyes. That it had turned away from him, heading towards an ominous storm.

He shook his head to clear the thought.

He had sent John away to lead a normal life with his own family.

Arthur couldn’t possibly try to reach out to John, not without risking even more than what both of them already had.

If he ever found John, there was no doubt him and John in the same place would attract dangerous and unwanted attention eventually. There was just no way in hell that it would ever end well.

Even though he desperately wanted more than anything to reach out to his brother, Arthur had to believe that John and his family were safe.

He had to let him go.

Arthur ran a hand through his chestnut-brown hair, squeezing the rough strands between his fingers. He grimaced, trying to focus on that small feeling rather than the pain that welled in his heart.

If he were truthful with himself, he wasn’t sure he was ever going to be able to move on.

He was supposed to have died on that damn rock.

But here he was.

He had to accept the fact that he needed to make a new life for himself … one way or another.

••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••

You watched as Arthur’s face seemed to twist in pain as he grabbed at his hair. You couldn’t bear to see him in that sort of agony. Reaching out you placed a hand on his arm, trying to get him to let go of his hair so he didn’t pull any of it out. “Arthur, please,” you whispered softly. “I’m sorry if I brought back any painful memories for you.”

He just shook his head as he lowered his arm, placing the hand on his journal instead as he stared down at it. “It ain’t your fault,” he said roughly, “Just gotta lot on my mind right now.” He cleared his throat, then patted hard at his chest with his other hand.

You observed his physical behavior closely, then you stood suddenly.

Arthur raised his head to look up at you. “Somethin’ wrong?”

You shook your head, “Not particularly. I just need to do another check-up on you.” You turned away to walk into the cabin, smiling a little as you heard his disapproving groan. As you gathered all the supplies you needed, you glanced over at his satchel. Maybe he would like to have it so he could carry his journal around easier, you thought. If he was going to be outside, it wouldn’t hurt to bring it out to him. You grabbed the brown bag and stepped back outside.

Luckily, Arthur hadn’t moved from his position on the bench. After having heard his less than favorable reaction to your statement earlier, you’d half-expected him to flee, though he probably wouldn’t have made it that far. Maybe that was the reason he was still here.

Either way, you knew that he knew you needed to look over him. Professionally, of course.

Sitting back down next to him again you placed your supplies on the small porch table by the bench swing. You held out his satchel to him, and when he gave you a puzzled frown you said, “I just thought it would make it easier for you to carry your journal around in, if you’re going to be outside for the day. You can keep the pencil, too.”

Arthur gave an amused smile as he let out a soft chuckle. “Thank you, honey,” he said as he reached out to take it, bringing the strap over his head so that it was looped around his neck, the bag getting tucked securely underneath his arm at his side. Then he placed the journal inside the satchel along with the pencil you had given him.

You gave him a smile, unable to help but blush a little from his gratitude. “You’re welcome, Arthur.”

Once you had all the supplies prepped, Arthur cooperated throughout the routine. It was almost second nature to him by now, no doubt. The stethoscope, listening to his heart and lungs, examining his mouth and throat. You smiled at him as you placed everything back on the tray. “Everything is looking wonderful, Arthur,” you said in a cheerful tone. “Honestly, I’m amazed at how quickly your body is healing.”

Arthur shrugged, his big shoulders tensing as he lifted them. “All cuz of you, honey,” he said teasingly with a grin, his deep drawl sending shivers up and down your spine.

Again, how on Earth could a man possess such a voice, you thought. Whoever was going to end up with him was going to be one lucky woman.

You froze, surprised that that thought actually sent a feeling of jealousy through you. But, why? The man clearly wasn’t interested in you in any way whatsoever. At least — he hadn’t shown any signs that he was. Sure he called you honey sometimes, but he’d told you it was simply because of the natural remedy you had been treating his tuberculosis with. So there was nothing romantic in that word, therefore it wasn’t an endearment, right?

You shook yourself mentally, feeling ashamed at the horrible emotion. You had no right to feel jealous over him. He was gorgeous, you had to admit, but that didn’t give you a right to him, not even if you saved his life. “How is everything feelin’ right now, Arthur?” You asked him, trying to get your mind away from that state. “Anythin’ hurting in your chest or throat?”

Arthur’s expression lifted as he shook his head. “Nothin’, Y/N. I don’t feel any pain at all.”

You nodded, happy with his answer. “That’s very good, Arthur. I’m very glad to hear that.” Grabbing a small glass vial from the tray, you pulled out one of the small leaves and held it out to him. “I need you to take this now.”

Arthur took the small leaf between his fingers, giving you a puzzled look. “This looks familiar.” He said, holding the leaf up in the light as he examined it closely.

“It’s Hummingbird Sage,” you informed him, “It should help give you a little bit of energy today.”

He smiled at you as he placed it in his mouth, and you watched as the bob in his throat moved, indicating that he had swallowed it. “Thanks, darlin’.”

You gave him another nod. “You’re welcome, Arthur, I’m just glad you’re doing better.”

His sharp blue eyes suddenly narrowed at you, “What about you?” He asked. “Have you been keepin’ yourself safe from the damn disease?”

He was referring to his tuberculosis, you knew. From that first night, when he’d tried to get away from you in an attempt to keep you from catching the disease, you’d tried to assure him that you were taking your own treatments, giving yourself the necessary herbs to kill off any potential bacteria.

“Yes, I’m just fine.” You replied.

He gave you a small smile, his beautiful blue eyes softening. “Good.”

You returned his smile. “Besides, you shouldn’t be infectious anymore. The medicinal properties should have killed off any active bacteria by now, if my past treatments are anything to go by.”

“I’m human.” He reminded you, his deep voice amused.

You blushed, “Yes, I know, Arthur.” You said, entwining your fingers around the glass vial nervously. “But I’m saying that if you wanted any sort of physical contact with anyone,” your blush grew hotter, but you reminded yourself that you were just giving him professional advice, as a doctor would to his patient, “there’s nothing to worry about. In fact, Tuberculosis can’t actually be spread by mouth or any sort of physical contact. Only just the coughing.”

You fiddled with the small vial, watching the tiny leaves shift back and forth within the glass. “But again, you don’t need to worry about us. I’ve treated this disease before and our herbs have never let us down in keeping us safe.”

Arthurs’ blue eyes just stared at you, his expression one of amusement, “You are way too smart for your own damn good, woman.” He teased.

You laughed, and your reaction made him smile. Both of you sat in silence for a moment, facing each other as the bench slightly swung back and forth.

Arthur’s blue stare skimmed over to your garden, and he asked, “So, you grow these herbs yourself?”

You rubbed your fingers together shyly as you glanced over at the variety of plants growing together. “Yes, I … I take notes in my mother’s journal about them. Whenever I discover anything new, that is. Any ailments they may treat or cure, what sort of treatment they need, how to grow them properly, how to prepare them for use or consumption. You name it, it’s all in there. Everything she and I know.”

“And this journal of yours, you fill it out yet?” Arthur asked, his tone amused as he turned his gaze back at you.

You gave a small laugh. “More like a book now, really. I’m very lucky my mother decided to get herself such a thick journal. Honestly, she filled up most of it. I’ve just been adding what I can, including some notes here and there on what she already wrote down.”

Arthur nodded, his eyes looking down slightly has he took in what you said. After a while, he looked back over at you again. “So how long you and Austin been livin’ up here?”

You looked over you shoulder to watch Austin working as you answered, “He and I, we’ve been up in these woods for about three years now. We used to live on our plantation with our father before Mother died. But I decided I didn’t want to stay cooped up there anymore.” You let out a long breath, lowering your gaze to your hands. “Father didn’t want me to leave. After what happened to Mother, he was scared to lose me. It took a long time to persuade him, but he finally gave in, but he insisted that Austin was to go with me for my own protection. Even Austin agreed.”

You smiled at the thought of your brother and his over-protective nature. “They didn’t want it any other way, and my brother came up here with me. We built this cabin since the , and it’s truly been a crazy few years up here.” You let out a small laugh at the memories.

Arthur grinned at your humor. “So what do you do up here usually?”

You watched as Austin picked up a pitchfork to lift up a patch of hay. “We mostly get by on our own. My brother hunts for us while I grow vegetables and fruits in the garden.” Your smile faded as you spoke the next words. “It’s been hard lately though. With winter coming up in a couple months, Austin has been finding it harder to find anythin’. He’s … he never quite learned how to hunt or track, he’s sort of ... self-taught,” you confessed.

Arthur’s eyes widened at that, “So you two been strugglin’ up here off and on all this time?”

You nodded, hating to admit it, but it was the truth. “That’s why Austin was so mad when I took you in. I’m sure he never hated you personally, he just … he just worries, is all.”

Arthur stared at you for a moment, his blue eyes unmoving as he seemed lost in thought. After a few minutes, he finally asked, “Would you like me to teach y’all how to hunt?”

You jerked your head back over to him, your expression and voice surprised, “What?”

He looked over at Austin and back at you again. “I have a few skills under my belt, if y’all are interested in learnin’ how to track and hunt. Hell, I’d be glad to, it’s the least I can do to return the favor for now.” With those words he suddenly stood.

His action surprised you, but he didn’t give you any time to respond as he walked off the porch and headed towards your brother. What had just happened? You stood up to follow him. He was getting quicker on his feet since his body had been getting better, and him being a big man you already had to run to catch up to him. By the time you finally did he was already approaching Austin.

Austin noticed Arthur as he walked up to him and straightened up from the hay he was spreading on the ground. “Hey, cowpoke,” His voice was a teasing tone, but Arthur wasn’t amused.

“Don’t test me, boah,” he said, his blue eyes narrowing dangerously. He placed both his hands on his belt, then said in an amused tone, “Your sister here says you don’t know how to hunt.”

“What the hell, Y/N?!” Austin snapped furiously, a blush showing up in his cheeks.

“I didn’t say it like that!” You snapped back furiously, then stepped back. You brought your hand to play with your hair nervously. “Well, not exactly like that, anyway. I just — I just told him you’ve been havin’ a hard time with it because you were never … properly taught.”

Austin’s eyes narrowed at you, his expression still shadowed with anger. “Why would you tell him that?”

Arthur intervened into the conversation, his deep voice penetrating the air as he lifted his arms from his sides. “If you’re interested, boah, I’ll teach you how to track and hunt so you can catch more game.”

Austin looked back over at Arthur, his eyes nearly wide, his entire expression looking stunned. He almost looked like the young boy that was just told he was getting a horse for his birthday all over again. “You … you’ll what? You’d teach me to do all that?” He voice nearly sounded breathless, almost excited. He was clearly thinking back to when Arthur had shot that jackrabbit, the way he’d done it so flawlessly with such little effort. “I would — I would like that,” he stuttered, actually admitting to the truth to your surprise, again almost like a star-struck child. “When you’re better, I mean, I … Yeah, that might actually be fun.”

You knew how hard it was for your brother to admit to something like that, you thought, especially when it was about one of his flaws. But this could probably be a chance for the two of them to get along better.

Arthur nodded. “Sounds good, feller.” He looked around, placing his hands back on his belt as he took in the surroundings. “There anythin’ you need me to do here now? I need to find somethin’ to do other than lay on a damn couch all day,” he said, his voice sharp at the last words.

Austin looked taken aback, seeming a bit surprised that Arthur actually wanted to do some work. He nodded slowly, “Well, we need to catch some fish.” He looked over to the stream, “I was plannin’ to do it after this but I would really appreciate it if someone else did it for me. I really need to take the horses for a ride, give them some exercise outside their pen.” He narrowed his eyes at Arthur, “Do you know how to fish?”

“’Course I do,” Arthur said assuredly, giving a single nod.

“Good, cuz Y/N sure don’t.”

“Austin!” You snapped.

“Eye for an eye, sister, plus it’s the truth,” your brother stated, a grin stretching that stupid loud mouth of his.

You growled as he turned away, heading over to the small shack by the stables. He pulled out a large metal bucket with fishing supplies and a long fishing rod. He came back, holding the bucket out to Arthur. “Got everythin’ you need in here. Bait, lures,” he held out the fishing rod, “And here’s this.”

Arthur took the rod, but before he took the large bucket you snatched it out of your brother’s hand. “I will be holding this,” you said, looking at Arthur sternly, “I won’t be lettin’ you lift anything heavy.”

Those blue eyes lit up in amusement as Arthur smiled at you. “Alrighty then, darlin’,” his deep voice teased, “You’re strong, aint’cha?”

His comment nearly surprised you, you had expected him to protest you taking a share of the load, which would’ve annoyed you. But he hadn’t. He saw you as a completely capable woman able to carry your own weight. He was clearly not one of those high-society types, you thought, your heart lifting with a smile.

“Hey now,” Austin interrupted, “I ain’t toleratin’ any of that sweet-talk toward my sister.” His tone was light-hearted, but you could hear a trace of protectiveness underneath it.

You realized at that moment that that was the very first time Arthur had actually called you any sort of endearment right in front of your brother. Now that you thought about it, he’d never even called you honey when your brother was in the same room. Why was that?

Austin was right back to being his usual self again. “Alright, then. I’m going to take the horses out on their run. I’ll be back in about an hour or so.” He gave Arthur a dark look. “Don’t you dare try anythin’ with my sister, mister.”

Arthur’s dark brows furrowed, his expression amused at the fact that Austin was daring to talk to him like that, but he seemed to understand. Austin was just acting as a normal brother would. “Don’t you worry, feller,” he said, his voice matter-of-fact, “Your sister’s safe with me.”

Austin gave him a quizzical look, “She’d better be. Otherwise, I know she has her shotgun to take you out if I ain’t here.”

Arthur looked over at you and winked. His unexpected action made you blush, and you looked down at your feet to avoid those piercing blue eyes.

Austin nodded, as if he was sure he’d made his point. He came over to give you a hug, “I’ll be back soon, alright, Y/N?” Then he whispered in your ear. “Make sure he don’t try nothin’ stupid.”

You smirked at his words, even after a whole month Austin still had his doubts sometimes. You returned his hug, “Alright, Austin. Take care of Lily and stay safe.”

Since Butch was loyal to Austin, your brother often rode on Lily whenever he took them for a ride, knowing the war horse would follow him anywhere. It was better than tying poor Lily up to a rope and leading her with another horse like some kind of wild animal.

“You know I will. I’ll see you soon.” Austin gave you a peck on the forehead and headed towards the stables, waving over his shoulder. You watched as your brother climbed onto Lily and lead the horses away, taking them down a beaten path and disappearing into the thick woods.

“Alright,” Arthur huffed, “let’s get to it,” He grinned at you and started walking over to the stream with the fishing rod. You followed closely behind with the bucket. As you both reached the waterline, you set the bucket down on the large stump and sat down on the thick fallen log next to it.

Arthur knelt to the ground by the stump and reached into the bucket, pulling out a few lures and two cans of bait along with a can-opener. You watched as he got to work on setting everything up, tightening up the fishing line in the reel and attaching one of the lures to the end, his fingers working flawlessly. He made it look so easy.

“So, how long you been fishin’, Arthur?” You asked as he opened one of the cans with the small metal tool.

He looked up from his work briefly, “I was taught at a young age,” he answered, “Hosea showed me how.”

“Hosea? Who’s he?”

Arthur seemed to still, stopping what he was doing. Then a dark shadow went over his eyes as he appeared to get lost in thought.

“He was like a father to me.” He finally said, his voice nearly hoarse, “Took me in when I was about fourteen, raised me ever since.” He lowered his head, “I lost him not that long ago.”

You brought a hand up to your mouth, suddenly feeling terrible for having asked about the man. Arthur looked so pained now. “I’m so sorry, Arthur.”

He just gave a weak smile. “It’s fine,” was all he said for a long while, but his voice sounded far from sincere. “Don’t worry about it. What’s done is done.”

You gave Arthur a sympathetic look as he pulled some bait from the can and started attaching it to the lure. “I’m know he’s looking down on you, Arthur. I’m sure he’s proud of you,” you said, trying to comfort him. You didn’t know who Hosea was, but the man had raised Arthur from a child. And having seen the kind of man Arthur was assured you that Hosea had no doubt a good person.

Arthur looked up at you and gave a soft smile. “Thanks, honey.” After a long moment he went back to work on completing the task of connecting the bait to the lure.

“Okay,” He grunted once he was finished, standing back up to his feet, “We’re ready now.”

He walked over to the waterline. Bringing the rod over his shoulder, he swung the thing forward, and the lure travelled swiftly through the air, landing onto the water’s surface in the middle of the wide stream.

He playing and yanking at the fishing pole, cranking the reel every so often.

“What are you doing?” You asked, curious to his small actions.

“What d’ya mean?” He didn’t look back at you, his mind completely focused on his task. “Yankin’ the fishin’ line?”

You nodded, “Does that attract the fish?”

He looked over his shoulder at you then, a look of surprise on his face, “So Austin was tellin’ the truth, then. You don’t know how to fish?”

You lowered your head in embarrassment, shaking it back and forth in a ‘no.’

Arthur laughed, and his reaction surprised you. Why would that be funny? You narrowed your eyes, slightly offended.

“C’mere,” he motioned with one of his hands at you, prompting you to come forward.

You hesitated for a few seconds, but then you stood up from the log and walked over until you were standing next to his tall form. Arthur reeled in the line til the lure was withdrawn from the water.

“Here, take this,” he said. He held out the fishing rod to you, and you took it with a shaky hand. It was a little heavier than it looked, and you almost dropped it, but thankfully you managed to get a good grip on it with both of your hands.

“Alright,” Arthur said. “Stand right here.” He stood behind you and grabbed both your shoulders with his big hands, positioning you right at the edge of the water. His closeness astonished you. Did he even realize the blush that was starting to form on your face? Did he even register how close he truly was, or was his mind just on the fishing lesson?

“Now,” he said, his deep drawl firm, “Once you get a good stance, you’re gonna throw that fishin’ lure into the water.” He stood at your side then and imitated the action from earlier, moving his arms to show you how to throw the line properly. “Now once you toss it, ya need to let go of the reel so that it can unravel.

With slight hesitation and a lot of confusion, you held up the rod and snapped it forward, but you forgot to let go of the reel, causing the line to whip around and catch you on your thigh. “Ouch!” You shouted, grabbing at the lure that was now stuck on your pant leg.

“You alright?” Arthur sounded concerned as he walked around you to look at the hook now snagged in the cloth.

“Yes,” you said, catching your breath, “it just pinched me a little.”

“Here,” Arthur reached out with his hands and worked the hook loose. “There we go.”

You gave him a grateful smile as he stepped back around you. “Thank you.”

He chuckled. “Least I can do, wanna try again?”

You thought about it then nodded, smiling at him. “Sure, why not?” You tried a few more times, all the while Arthur mimicking how to throw the lure in an effort to help. Your throws were weak at first, but on your fifth attempt you finally managed to get a good toss and the lure flew through the air, landing out in the middle of the wide stream. “I did it!” You shouted happily.

Arthur smiled, “That you did, honey.” He came to stand behind you. “Now, you gotta pull at the fishin rod to get a fish’s attention. It won’t give a damn about the lure otherwise. You need to make the lure act like prey just asking to be eatin’.”

You nodded, then started yanking at the pole.

“Not so hard, now,” Arthur said with a chuckle, placing a hand on your wrist. “You gotta do it in short bursts. Little twitches here and there.” You did as he said. “There ya go, darlin’. Now, slowly start bringin’ the line back in, the lure will look like a small fish swimmin’ across the surface.”

You cranked the reel slowly, bringing the line in at a snail’s pace.

Suddenly the lure was yanked hard.

“You got one!” Arthur shouted.

“What do I do?” You asked frantically.

“Calm down, just start pullin’ the rod and reel that big sucker in.”

You struggled to pull but the fish was fighting you hard. How on Earth did such a small creature have so much strength? Arthur reached over to help you pull the rod back and you started reeling the fish in until it was at the shoreline. Finally you yanked it out of the water.

“You got yourself a Muskie there, honey!” Arthur exclaimed, his grin wide, his face glowing as if he were proud of you.

“I did it!” You said happily, all but ecstatic. Arthur helped you to undo the hook from the fish’s mouth and placed the fish into the large bucket.

“Good job,” Arthur said as he came back over. He reached out and patted you hard on the shoulder with his big hand. “Your first fish, and a big feller at that.”

You smiled widely, “That was so exciting, I want to try that again!”

Arthur chuckled, “Go for it, honey. You need my help?”

You thought about it. Arthur had used up quite a bit of energy helping you haul in that fish, and truth be told you actually wanted him to take a break. You shook your head. “No, Arthur, I got this one. Do me a favor?”

He looked at you expectantly.

“Go sit over on that log and rest for a bit.”

He closed his eyes in a huff, “Why did I get the feelin’ you were gonna tell me somethin’ like that?”

You gave him another one of your playful sad looks to try and appeal to him, “Please, Arthur?”

He let out a long, loud sigh. “Fine, honey. I’ll watch you on this one.” His words sounded stoic, not thrilled at all to be left out of the action. But he did as you asked, going over to sit on the large fallen log.

••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••

Arthur had known the woman was going to say something along the lines of ‘you need to rest.’ Dammit, he’d been hearing those words endlessly over the last month.

And honestly, why did he listen to her? He wondered that as he sat down on the thick log, facing Y/N so he was able to watch her fish. As he watched her throw the lure back out to the stream, he remembered the answer.

She was persistent, absolutely ruthless when it came to his health. Whenever he protested, she never let up.

Y/N cared about him, he had no doubt in his mind about that.

He couldn’t help himself as he took in her form, appreciating her body again. Damn, she was beautiful, he thought. A strong woman with a strong mind. He needed a woman like that, someone who wasn’t afraid to back down from him.

As she reeled in the lure and threw it out again, he thought about what she’d said to him earlier, about everything she’d gone through. The hardship she endured from having lost her mother to outlaws, moving away and living out here off the land with her brother.

He wondered who her father was. She’d said that she had lived on a plantation, and he wondered which one, if he would recognize it if she told him.

He smiled as he heard her curse under her breath.

Y/N was a damn god-send, he thought. She had saved his life, with no thought or worry for her own needs.

He needed to find a way to thank her. He wanted to help her in some way, to repay her somehow.

Arthur scratched at the underside of his jaw with the back of his thumb, thinking about how he could possibly repay her for all she had done.

He smiled to himself as he thought about her telling him about the white lily, her favorite flower, how much it meant to her. She’d said that they couldn’t grow in this area and that she couldn’t grow any for herself.

He knew what they looked like, maybe he could —

Arthur froze, a single thought sitting in his head. He immediately opened his satchel and pulled out his journal, opening it to another blank page. Without a second’s hesitation he began to sketch.

••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••

You huffed, starting to get irritated at the lack of any fish biting. You started to think that you were damn lucky in getting that other fish, let alone such a massive one. After about twenty minutes you reeled the line in, done for the time being. Fishing was clearly fun, but only when there were actual fish.

Turning around you walked back over to Arthur, sitting down on the log next to him and propping the fishing rod up against it. He was giving you a strange look, his blue eyes almost sparkling. “What is it, Arthur?”

“I … ,” His voice sounded rough, his eyes still having that strange look. He opened his journal and tore out a single page with a drawing on it. “I thought you might like this, Y/N.” He handed the paper over to you and you took it.

The sketch you saw instantly had your eyes nearly watering.

A white lily.

“Arthur … this is … ” You couldn’t find the words, feeling like you could barely breathe at the sight.

“This is so beautiful,” you finally breathed out. “Thank you.”

Emotion overcame you and you couldn’t control yourself as you suddenly reached up and laid a kiss on his cheek.

You pulled away to see Arthur’s stunned expression.

You were absolutely appalled at what you had just done. “I’m — I’m so sorry, Arthur, I didn’t mean … I — I don’t know what came over me ... I’ve never kissed anyone before.”

Those shining blue eyes glittered as he looked at you with amusement, a beautiful smile slowly lifting on his face. “Is that right, honey?”

Then with that he leaned in ... and placed a kiss on your lips.

— To Be Continued

**Notes for the Chapter:**

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	7. Chapter 7

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> You save a mysterious man who is dying on a mountain. Finding out he has Tuberculosis, you use your knowledge and skills with herbs and natural remedies to save him from death and help nurse him back to health. As he slowly starts to recover, you can’t help but wonder: Who is this man? Why had you found him the way that you did, beaten and ill? Only time, patience … and perhaps love … will tell.

Arthur hadn’t expected it.

The feeling of Y/N’s soft lips on his skin, though brief, had completely surprised him. He’d truly had no idea that his drawing would bring out that kind of response from her.

He’d only thought of his drawing as a mere momentary ‘thank you' for all she’d done for him, at least until he was physically capable of doing much more, something kind of like hard labor in return for all her troubles, such as hunting or field work.

After having realized what the white lily meant to her, what it stood for in her life, he knew the sketch of the flower would mean a lot to her, but a receiving a kiss on the cheek for it? His mind nearly raced, still feeling the wetness on his cheek that her lips had left behind.

She’d pulled away instantly, and the blush in her cheeks that he noticed was absolutely adorable. She didn’t look at him as she said, “I’m so sorry, Arthur, I didn’t mean … I — I’ve never kissed anyone before. I don’t know what came over me.”

Those words slammed into him hard, taking him aback. This beautiful woman— one who looked after him all this time, putting his own needs before hers, showing so much passion and strength for her work — turned out to be just as delicate as the white lily itself when it came to anything intimate.

In that moment, knowing how embarrassed she was about what she’d done, knowing how truly inexperienced she was, he wanted to lean forward and claim those lips for his own, to be the first one to kiss those beautiful lips, to reassure her that he was grateful for what she’d given him, that her adorable action was nothing to be ashamed of. Even though he hadn’t expected it from her, he found that he was extremely drawn to her for it.

He hadn’t had very much luck with women in the past because of the life he’d led, and who he’d been. No woman would have him, every one of them leaving him in the end because of the choices he’d made and the life style he’d led. But now … with this fresh start to his new life … and with a woman who showed that she clearly cared about him and for his health, he realized he could be a new man, someone who could possibly protect her and keep her safe with the skills he possessed.

He wanted to let her know that she had nothing to worry about.

“Is that right, honey?” He asked her with a grin, still enjoying the nickname he’d given her. Then before she could respond to his question he leaned his head forward and claimed her lips with his own.

Warm. Oh, so very warm. Her lips felt so plump and soft against his rough ones. She opened her mouth in a gasp, and Arthur stole that opportunity to deepen the kiss even further, pushing his tongue between her teeth and colliding it with her own. Part of him couldn’t believe what he was doing, feeling like he was taking complete advantage of her by taking the kiss even further.

But another part of him knew deep down that he actually wanted this woman. Though she was unaware of it, after all this time she’d proven to him that she was someone who deserved passion, someone who was worth protecting, and he was going to do just that, even if it ended up being just the latter. She’d saved his life, so it was the least he could do.

Those words rang in his head again, the ones she’d said to him earlier, still haunting his mind.

I hate them, every outlaw out there.  
Damn those words.

He’d been an outlaw all his life, his rough childhood leading him to join a gang he’d eventually come to know as his own family. The family who raised him for so many years to grow into the man he was today.

They were all so misunderstood in a world that absolutely refused their lifestyles, the harsh ways they got by with the actions they committed. The life of an outlaw, wild and free, making a living off of murdering and thieving, but only to those who deserved it.

But the rest of the world would never listen. It was their way or nothing, and Arthur had chosen his path.

But he understood her pain, and why she would say something like that. Whoever these men were, they had stolen away her mother, someone who she’d clearly loved very dearly.

He knew he didn’t deserve Y/N. Not after everything he’d done, not even if he became a new man. How would he ever tell her who he’d been without scaring her, without her running away in the end like all the others?

He tried to chase those thoughts away, distracting himself with the feeling of Y/N’s mouth against his.

••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••

You couldn’t believe it … he was kissing you.

Arthur was kissing you!  
When you’d pulled away after kissing him on the cheek, you’d expected him to verbally lash out at you in some way, to be berated with questions on why you thought you had the right to lay your lips on him in any way. Maybe your expectation of his response was a bit of an over-exaggeration, but you couldn’t help but feel terrified from what you’d just done. Your mind was completely overwhelmed from it, racing with thoughts that had no semblance of reality to them whatsoever.

But in the end, he didn’t do any of those things you’d expected him to. No, instead he said those few words, using that endearment again, leaned forward and placed those lips of his right on your own.

They felt so rough, but also warm and soft at the same time.

You were being kissed, you realized, and the realization of that fact had your heart racing. The kiss was such a surprise that you couldn’t help a small gasp escape you at the response, and you felt his wet tongue push into your mouth, licking its way between your teeth so it could dance with yours.

You were unable to move, unsure of what to do, so you just stayed still and let him continue the kiss, eventually finding yourself getting lost in the foreign sensations of all the warmth and wetness. So this was a kiss, you thought. It felt so strange, being so close to a man like this, feeling his heat through his lips and his tongue.

You found yourself absorbing his sweet touch, leaning in closer to him, allowing yourself to be led into his intimacy.

You thought of the feelings that overcame you from the beautiful drawing he’d made of your favorite flower, something special that he’d made just for you. The fact that he realized the flower meant so much to you, and that he went out of his way to draw such a pretty depiction of it so you could have something that symbolized such strong emotion; you couldn’t help but to get lost in his embrace.

After moments passed into the kiss, you felt his hand begin stroking the back of your neck, and he began running his fingers through your hair, his grip tightening to pull you even closer to him. He began to press harder, his head tilting to get better access to your lips as his breathing intensified through his nose, deepening the kiss even further. He pushed his tongue against yours, licking and sucking at your lips and teeth. The scruff of his beard felt rough on your skin, and the heat of him increased.

All these staggering feelings running through your head and his actions suddenly became so immense that you jerked your head back, breaking the intimate contact. You hesitated as you distanced yourself from his face, bringing your eyes up to see the confused look he was giving you for pulling away. Those sapphire-emerald eyes of his were holding so much emotion in them that you couldn’t possibly begin to read whatever he was feeling. You looked away to avoid his gaze.

His deep drawl made you shiver, “Are you alright, Y/N?” He released his grip from your neck, lowering his hand down to his side.

You nodded, unable to form any words. The space between both of you suddenly becoming very static and uncomfortable. Though you couldn’t deny the feelings that went through your body for this man, you couldn’t let yourself get carried away. Not now and not like this.

There was no doubt in your mind that his body and mind were still weak in certain areas, his mental state still recovering from all his treatments. There was a possibility he wasn’t actually thinking straight, and he didn’t deserve to get taken advantage of like this.

“It’s nothing, Arthur,” you said under your breath, shaking your head in an effort to try and bring your mind away from the heat you’d felt and bring it back to reality. “Please don’t think anything of it, I’m just … You’re still sick. I can’t let you … I’m not going to —” How could you possibly let him know what you were thinking without revealing the kinds of feelings you had for him? If anything, doing so would no doubt scare him away when he was thinking straight, and that was the last thing you both needed since he was still recovering.

You could still feel his stare, and you looked back up to see his face. His expression was somber. His lips, that beautiful mouth that was just on your own, now pressed into a thin line of disappointment. His blue eyes that had been sparkling before were now flat, his dark brows furrowed down as if he were lost in thought.

Finally, he lifted the corners of his lips to give you a small smile. “It’s alright, Y/N,” he said, his voice sounding low and hoarse as he gave a single nod, looking toward the stream. “I understand.”

Did he though, you thought as you took in his features. Arthur’s face looked pained, as if he were remembering something. Possibly from his past?

Suddenly, he braced his hands on his knees and stood up from the fallen log. Without a word and without looking at you he bent over and grabbed the fishing rod from your side, walking back over to the edge of the wide stream. What was going through his mind, you thought as he cast the lure back out to the water in silence. Then another thought occurred to you, and it made you worry. Was he hating himself for what he’d done?

“Arthur?” You called out.

He looked over his shoulder at you, offering a small smile, though you knew it wasn’t genuine. “Yeah?” He asked.

You stared down at your feet, pushing a few rocks with the tip of your toe, not sure of what to say. Finally, you lifted your head back up to look at him, “I think you’re a good man,” you said. It was all you could say, you couldn’t think of anything else. But you wanted to let him know that he had nothing to worry about, that nothing had changed because of the kiss.

He’d proven to you over the last few weeks that he was an honorable person, someone to be trusted and who deserved respect. So what you said was the truth, even it it was out of the blue.

His lips suddenly tightened in response, as if he felt uncomfortable with your words, but why would he be? But then he just nodded, and turned his head back toward the stream.

You hadn’t meant to make him feel rejected, you thought sadly, lowering your head back down to push a few more rocks with your feet. The intimate connection you’d both just shared had been such a strange sensation, such a foreign feeling to you, that when he’d suddenly started to push further it had made you pull away. There was no doubt in your mind that he must’ve thought of that action as you turning him down, but truly you knew you were just concerned for his health.

But he was clearly hurting, and you wondered what must’ve been going through his head at that moment. He seemed to accept the thought of the rejection rather strangely, as if it had happened to him before. You lifted your gaze back up to look at him.

Had he loved someone in his past? Someone he’d loved who’d left him, or hadn’t loved him in return?

You narrowed your eyes, studying his broad form, his beautiful dark-chestnut-brown hair, the strong way he held himself. What woman in their right mind would turn this man away? You couldn’t help but stare at him as his back was to you, unable to stop yourself from noticing the power his body held, the way he gave off a kind of intimidation that was indescribable. He was like a large beast that couldn’t help but display his menacing characteristics just by his appearance alone.

You wondered what he would be like once he was fully recovered and truly back on his feet.

Who had he been, you pondered then, what sort of things had happened to him to shape him into the man he appeared to be now? What kind of life had he led up to this point, before you’d found him dying on that mountain? Why or how had he gotten sick?

What horrible things had happened to him that made him end up the way you’d found him? All these questions started running through your mind as you tried your best to piece things together, but none of it made sense. From what you had experienced of his personality, you couldn’t figure out why he’d been there, sick, beaten and bleeding. The person he was now was such a big contrast to whoever he could have possibly been to end up that way.

Then you thought of that mysterious man you’d spotted disappearing into the forest, the moonlight revealing that dirty blonde hair. It had been the only characteristic of his you’d picked up, along with his very nasty voice as he’d been cursing while running off. Had he been the one who placed Arthur in the situation you’d found him in? Was he the one who’d beaten him so badly that he’d been brought to the brink of death? A part of you desperately wanted to find out who that man was, what he was doing, where he was now. Anger nearly boiled your blood at the thought of that man hurting Arthur. From what you’d seen so far, he hadn’t deserved that horrible thing to happen to him. No one did, but especially not him. You were just so grateful you had found him in time.

You remembered him mentioning someone named Hosea. You weren’t sure if it had slipped from his lips by accident based on the expression he’d made after he’d said it, but he’d explained that the man had been a sort of father-figure to him. What had happened to his real parents, how did Hosea find him? What happened to him that made him lose his life? The questions seemed endless. The more you learned about Arthur, the more questions seemed to be raised.

The silence between the two of you stretched on for so long, and all the while you tried to think of what to say next. But what was there to say? There was no doubt in you mind that he thought you rejected him, and he was hurting because of it. He was still highly medicated, so his mind was weak, you thought, he wasn’t thinking straight. And there were some side effects that could effect one’s thoughts and actions, no doubt. You’d seen the animals you’d treated in the past behave strangely in response to similar treatments.

It was such a damn dilemma. On one hand you worried his actions were based on his possibly mixed mentality from the medications, on the other you didn’t want him hurting or thinking that you didn’t care for him. All the while at the same time you didn’t want to risk chasing him off either.

Dammit, it felt like such a paradox!

There just couldn’t be any way that he had actually meant to kiss you … right?

Thinking back to the kiss, you raised the tips of your fingers to your lips. The kiss had actually felt so genuine. Even though you worried he was just under the influence of the herbs and medication, it had still felt so real, you thought. The connection, even if it was just on your side, had definitely been there during the kiss the entire time.

You had to apologize, to let him know there was nothing for him to worry about. None of it was his fault.

“Arthur, I — ” you looked back up at him and he turned to face you once again. The words caught in your throat as he waited for you to continue, and you tried you best to push them out. His stare definitely didn’t help. How could anyone possibly hole a straight conversation with this man with how intimidating he looked? “I — ”

The lure on the fishing line jerked, and Arthur snapped his head back over to the water, his focus back on the task at hand. He immediately began to reel in the line, drawing the fish closer and closer to shore.

Finally, he pulled a large Muskie out from underneath the surface, water splashing as it landed at his feet. He crouched down, bending his knees as he reached down to pick it up. He worked out and released the hook from its mouth and placed the large fish in the bucket with the other. “That oughta do it,” he said, his accent strong. He looked over at you, “There enough here to feed us for a couple days, you think?”

You had to smile as the unease seemed to soften just a bit from his light-hearted words. The tension was clearly still there, but you saw that he was giving you a chance to move forward to another topic. You nodded in response, “Yes, I think that should set us up for awhile.” He picked up the large bucket and without thinking you rushed over and took it from him, “Now, what’d I say about you lifting heavy objects?” You said as snatched it from his grasp playfully. As the weight was exchanged, you nearly dropped the bucked. Each fish had to at least weigh over fifteen pounds. There was no way you were going to let Arthur carry this.

He gave you a grin in response as he folded up the fishing rod, amused by your struggle, “Sure you can handle that, honey?” He teased. His voice was still a bit rough, as if his mind was still racing with emotions, but you could tell that he was trying really hard to lighten the mood.

“Yes, I got it, Arthur,” You teased back with a smile.

You and Arthur carried everything back to the shed by the stables, and you set the bucket down near Austin’s butchering station while Arthur placed the fishing rod back precisely where Austin had it stored before.

Just as you straightened from placing the bucket down you heard heavy hoofbeats growing closer. You looked around to see your brother riding Lily with Butch following directly behind him. The horses were incredibly dirty, their hooves and legs muddy as if they had had quite the run through the fields on the other side of the forest.

“Welcome back, Austin!” You shouted to him. Your brother lifted his hand in a wave as he rode over to you. Once he reached you and Arthur, he swung his leg over and dismounted Lily. You reached out to Lily and stroked her muzzle softly, “Were you a good girl?” You whispered playfully to the horse. Lily whinnied and shook her head up and down, her white mane flapping. You smiled, “I hope Austin was kind to you while you were away?”

You felt Austin’s glare on you, “Hey, now, you know I ain’t a bad rider!” he said.

You shrugged, and you couldn’t help but add, “I guess not, but Lily has told me here that you’re definitely not the best.”

Austin just gaped, then he looked up at Lily, “C’mon, girl, I ain’t that bad, right?” He actually waited for a response.

Lily just looked at him then turned her head, looking away from Austin as if to say she did not approve of him.

Austin’s jaw dropped, then he closed his mouth and just rolled his eyes, looking away as he went over to Butch, who nudged his shoulder. He scratched the horse’s large neck making the war horse let out a strong snort of content. “Alright, fine then. No carrots for you tonight, Lily. They’ll all go to Butch here.”

You gasped, bringing a hand to your chest in mock surprise, “How dare you threaten my girl!” You reached out and stroked Lily’s muzzle in an effort to comfort her, “Don’t worry, Lily, you can have all the treats you want. Don’t listen to the bad man.”

Austin couldn’t help but let out a small laugh at your silly action. He came over to give you a hug, like he usually did after coming back from a trip, no matter how long or short it was. “Missed you, little lady.” He said. You smiled and hugged him back, then he leaned down to say in your ear, “Did Arthur behave while I was gone, or do I need to beat him up for ya?” He made it look like he was whispering it to you, but you were sure he intentionally said it loud enough for Arthur to hear.

You lightly pushed at your brother’s chest, making him take a step back. “How dare you, Austin,” you snapped, feeling a blush creep into your cheeks. “Of course Arthur was a perfect gentleman!” You felt Arthur’s gaze on you and you turned to see him giving you a knowing smile, as if he was trying to make you think of the moment you two had just shared. You had to look away before your blush got any bigger. “He even taught me how to fish, we caught two large Muskies,” you added.

“Really? Great to hear that you know how to fish now.” Austin chuckled at your reaction, not picking up on what Arthur’s smile to you actually stood for. “Well, I gotta get to work, I’ll take care of the horses and then start gettin’ to work on the fish.”

You looked up at your brother and reached out to place a hand on his big shoulder, “How about Arthur and I take care of the horses and you get to work on the fish now? Remember, sharing the load?” It was hard to get Austin to split the work sometimes. Even after all these years he would rather have you handle the delicate tasks while he did all the dirty work. But of course, it was the natural instinct he had as your older brother.

Austin raised up a hand to rub at the back of his neck, letting out a sigh. “Alrighty then, you know where the water barrel is, right?”

You resisted the urge to roll your eyes at him, was he ever going to trust you to remember where things actually were? Just because you didn’t work in the stables that often didn’t mean you forgot where things were placed. “Yes, Austin, I know where it is, and the brush, and the other tools.”

“Would you like some help?” Arthur asked.

You turned to look at him and smiled. “If you’re up to it, that would be great. It shouldn’t be too much work.”

“Alright, sounds like we all got our tasks set,” Austin said, clapping his hands together once, “I’ll see y’all when dinner’s ready.” Then he looked at Arthur with narrowed eyes, he lifted a hand to point directly at his chest. “I’m still keepin’ my eye on you, mister.”

Arthur didn’t dignify the statement with any kind of response, but you rolled your eyes, then you started pushing your brother away, urging him toward the butchering station. “Go, Austin, we’ll handle the horses, don’t you worry.”

Austin just gave a smile and nodded. He patted Butch on the back one more time, “See you later, boy.” Then he turned away and headed over to start working on the fish you’d caught.

“Alright, Arthur,” you said. You placed a gentle hand on Lily’s muzzle, an effort to keep her calm as you urged Arthur with a waving hand, gesturing for him to come over and stand next to you. He did as you asked, and you had him stand in front of Lily as you stepped aside. “Lily’s not so good with strangers, and I know this is your first encounter with her, so I’m going to show you how to — ” You stopped mid-sentence as you watched, shocked at what you saw happen next.

Arthur lifted his hand up, keeping his palm and fingers flat to reduce the risk of them getting bitten off, and Lily lowered her head down to sniff at it. Then, to your surprise, she let out a loud chuff of air through her nostrils and nudged his hand playfully, taking a step forward to get closer to Arthur. She pushed at his shoulder with her nose and huffed, the air of the snort blowing Arthur’s dark chestnut-brown hair back. Arthur just smiled and reached up to pet her on the check, “That’s a good girl.” He said to her softly, his voice deep and soothing.

The way he said it had you thinking about how it would feel if he talked to you like that. You shook your head suddenly, trying to erase that thought from you mind. “She seems to really like you,” you blurted, genuinely surprised at Lily’s reaction to Arthur. The first time you’d gotten her as a foal while you’d lived at the plantation, she had never warmed up to anyone but you, rearing at any strangers who dared to approach her. But she was calm with Arthur, using her nose to play with Arthur’s hair as he just smiled, allowing her to do what she wished.

“She’s never done that before,” you breathed, unable to fathom the sight before you. “How … How on Earth did you do that?”

Arthur lifted his gaze to you as Lily continued nudging at him, “I just gotta way with horses, I guess.” He said, letting out a small chuckle as Lily nearly pushed him off his feet. He lifted a hand to stroke her muzzle, and she let out a soft nicker, lowering her head as if she wanted him to pet her more. Arthur reached up higher and patted her head softly, running his fingers through her rough white mane. “She’s beautiful,” he said.

You smiled at his compliment, touched by his words and how well Lily was getting along with Arthur. “Thank you, I got her when she was a foal for my 20th birthday. She’s the sweetest horse you’ll ever meet, as long as she likes you.”

Arthur smiled in response, his deep voice amused, “Is that right? Well, I guess I’m a lucky man.”

“Do you know how to lead a horse?” You asked, nodding your head at Lily’s reins.

“Course,” Arthur replied, then took Lily’s reins in his big hand, grasping the leather strips arounds his fingers, ready to lead her.

You walked over to Butch who was grazing at some of the grass near a tree, “Hey, Butch, you ready to get cleaned up?” You asked him. He lifted his head to look at you, and you approached him slowly, reaching out a hand to let him know who you were. He seemed to recognize you and turned to walk in your direction, his heavy hooves crushing the grass beneath his massive weight. He would be an absolute threat to anyone he didn’t know. “Atta boy,” You said, leading him towards the stables.

Arthur joined you at your side with Lily as you both took the horses into the stables. You told Arthur to place Lily in her stall as you attached Butch to the wash rack. You got the water barrel and brush ready then started getting to work on cleaning his fur, “Would you mind making sure their stalls are cleaned, Arthur?” You asked over your shoulder.

“Will do,” Arthur replied. Soon you could hear shuffling noises in the stalls as he got to work on changing them out.

Once Butch’s coat was clean and you finished washing all the mud from his legs, you got to work on his feet, using the hoof-pick to clean out all the dirt from his hooves. When you were finished, you untied him from the washing rack and placed him in his stall. Arthur had finished up that one first, and now he was currently working on finishing up Lily’s stall. She didn’t seem bothered by the fact that he was in her space at all, which was so odd to you. Even to you she would sometimes nicker in annoyance if you stayed in her stall for too long. She was often like a child in that way, wanting her space to herself. But she didn’t seem to mind with Arthur in the least bit.

Arthur finished spreading out the clean hay and walked back over to you, giving you a small smile as he placed his hands on his belt, “Lily’s turn now?” He asked, referring to the wash rack.

“Yes, sir!” You replied, “C’mon now, girl.” You clicked your tongue a few times to get Lily’s attention, and she started walking over to you. You lead her over to the wash rack and tied her securely so she wouldn’t move around, then you got to work on wetting the brush in the water barrel and running the bristles through her fur, working out all the mud and grime. She had such a beautiful white coat when she was clean, you thought to yourself with a smile.

Arthur came over and picked up the hoof-pick you had left on the nearby table. He positioned himself by the horse’s side and lifted up one of Lily’s back hooves to get to work on cleaning them out, scraping all the chunks of dirt out before moving to the next hoof. So he knew how to groom horses as well, you thought. Had he been some kind of stable-master? Maybe a cowhand? A cowboy? You started to wonder again who he possibly could have been before you’d met him.

Several minutes passed by as both of you helped Lily get clean, until finally the chore was done, and you led her back into her stall. She turned to face you as you closed her door and leaned her head over the low gate, nuzzling your hair as if to thank you. “No problem, Lily.” You laughed and reached over to one of the sacks hanging off the wall, pulling out a carrot and offering it to her, “Here you go.”

Lily took what you offered greedily and you patted her gently on the muzzle as she munched up the carrot. You turned to see Arthur leaning against one of the walls by Lily’s stall, his brows furrowed as he looked at the horses as if he were trying to study them. Grabbing another carrot from the sack you went over and held it out to Butch, and the large horse approached you, leaning its head over the gate and taking it from your hand. When you pulled away, you looked over at Arthur, and the silence that suddenly approached felt like it stretched on forever.

You thought back to the kiss, remembering the feeling of his mouth on yours, the expression he’d made when you’d ended the kiss so abruptly. He’d looked so pained after you’d pulled away, but he seemed to have accepted your rejection with such a strange ease, as if he were used to being denied?

You opened your mouth to say something, then closed it. What could you possibly say? Was there anything that was going to change the unease and tension that had now placed itself between the two of you?

“That your brother’s horse?” Arthur’s voice suddenly pierced the silence, and the deep tone almost made you jump.

“Yes,” you replied, trying to clear your mind to answer his question, “Austin got Butch as a foal for his 20th birthday back in ’87, and this big guy has never left his side since.” You smiled at the memories, thinking back on all the playful times your brother had with Butch as he’d raised him from such a tiny thing to the big war horse he was today.

“So you got this horse for your birthday?” Arthur asked, his deep voice sounding curious as he looked over at Lily.

You nodded, “A farmer owned a Shire ranch near our plantation and a foal was just born to two of them. Her parents were both brown, but she was pure white, and my father knew how much I loved the color. So, he offered to buy it from the farmer, and she became part of the family.” You looked over at Lily as she leaned her head over the gate, nudging Arthur’s shoulder. “Hey, girl, don’t bother him,” you said teasingly, “ you already got your treat.”

Arthur let out a chuckle as Lily pushed his head with her nose. “Easy, girl.” He patted her muzzle and gently pushed her away. Lily snorted and shook her head, turning away to start munching at the hay he’d thoughtfully filled her trough with earlier.

You thought about how good he seemed to be with the horses, how he knew what to do to care for them, and the question popped up once again. Who had he been before you’d found him? What sort of life had he led? He was clearly skilled with horses and how to treat them. There was no doubt in your mind that he probably knew how to ride them, too. So who or what could he have possibly been? “Arthur?”

He broke his gaze away from the horses and looked at you, “Hm?”

How were you going to ask the question without sounding too peckish for the answers? Was it truly any of your business what his past was like, who he’d been before you found him? “Um, I noticed how well you get along with horses … did you use to work with them?”

He narrowed his eyes slightly, his thick brows drawing down as he lowered his head, breaking the eye contact between both of you. It seemed as though he was getting lost in his memories once again. “I did,” he said after a few moments, his voice nearly sounding like gravel. “Used to have one of my own, but … it passed away recently.”

You felt your heart suddenly ache for him, and you stepped forward to place a comforting hand on his shoulder. “I’m so sorry, Arthur.”

He nodded, acknowledging your touch with a small smile.

You nearly wanted to kick yourself for asking yet another question that just ended up bringing more pain to Arthur. Even though you couldn’t possibly know what he’d lived through and what he’d experienced, this man had clearly had a very rough life before you’d found him, and anything you tried to find out from his past seemed to do nothing but hurt him.

Truly, his life must’ve been a harsh one. Whatever happened to make him this way, to put him through so much anguish, it was clear to you that his answers to your questions were not going to be good ones. You decided to leave it alone for now, to let him tell his story whenever he was ready.

You gave him another smile in an effort to reassure him, to wordlessly tell him that you were no longer going to pry.

Arthur’s eyes, those beautiful sapphire emeralds, practically sparkled as he looked down at you, his lips stretching into a small but beautiful smile.

•••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••

Arthur couldn’t help but appreciate the comfort Y/N was trying to give him, and he gave her a small smile to reassure her that he was alright, that she had nothing to worry about for asking him these things, he couldn’t blame her for being so curious about him.

But hell, he didn’t know how he was ever going to answer the questions she would have about his past. He feared that she was eventually going to find out who he’d been, what he’d been, what he’d done. He’d never even given her his last name in fear that she would recognize it and end up piecing together the undeniable fact that he was actually a wanted outlaw, and not just the innocent, normal man she had come to know him as.

He thought back on the kiss.

If she ever found out who he’d been, would she regret having done that with him? Would she throw him out of her house right on his ass?

Dammit, why had he done it, he thought. He’d had no right. She’d even pulled away from him when he’d tried taking it further, which he knew he’d been wrong for doing.

Of course she had rejected him, what woman in their right mind wouldn’t? He knew he didn’t deserve to have anyone in his life, not after the dark path he’d chosen to follow. It was no surprise to him that she’d broken away.

Then suddenly he thought of what she’d said earlier, that she’d never kissed anyone before. … Was that it? Had he moved too fast for her? Damn him, but was he an idiot for possibly not having thought of that sooner? He wanted to find out the reason she’d pulled away, even if he didn’t deserve to know the answer.

“You said you never kissed anyone before,” he said, his voice sounding rough to his own ears. He cleared his throat, “Is that why you pulled away?”

Her eyes widened at his question, and he wanted to punch himself in his own stupid face as he looked down to avoid her gaze. Why the hell did he even bother —

“Arthur,” her soft voice interrupted his thoughts, and he raised his eyes back up to look at her. Her expression was soft, and he could see a hint of blush filling her cheeks. “To be honest with you, I think I pulled away because … it was a lot to take in.” She lifted a hand to run her fingers though her hair, fiddling her finger through some of the loose strands as if she was nervous. “I was just worried, because you’re still sick. I — I wasn’t’t sure if the herbs and medication were mixing up your thoughts, so … I wasn’t going to let you do something that you probably didn’t mean to do, or that you would regret later.”

Arthur felt his heart nearly lift at her words, a heavy weight that had been sitting on his chest suddenly disappearing. So she’d thought that he hadn’t been thinking straight because of his treatments, and she’d feared that she would have been taking advantage of him if she’d allowed him to get carried away.

“You ain’t gotta worry ’bout that, honey.” He told her, his voice low and deep in an effort to soothe her. She gazed up at him curiously, as if to ask what he meant by that. He looked at those lips of hers, wet and inviting.

He leaned forward slowly, making sure she was comfortable with what he was about to do. But she didn’t move, and so he took that as an invitation.

Just as their lips were about to meet, that damn brother of hers shouted out from outside, “Y/N! Dinner’s all ready!”

She suddenly jerked, and Arthur straightened back up, fire in his eyes as he glared over at the open doorway of the stables, feeling like he wanted to burn everything else but Y/N at that moment.

“I — I think we should go and eat,” she said, her voice sounding so soft, as if she were shy about what had just been about to happen. He turned his head to look at her again. That blush was back in her cheeks, making her look so fragile. She stepped back and headed for the doorway. As soon as she reached it, she looked over her shoulder to see that he was still standing in the same spot he’d been in. “C’mon, Arthur!”

Arthur lowered his dark brows in irritation, placing both hands on his belt in a tight grip to avoid possibly murdering her brother for the intrusion, even if he hadn’t meant it. There was no way Austin could see what he and Y/N had been about to do.

But dammit, still!

He followed her back to the cabin where that damn brother of hers stood on the porch, waving nonchalantly at both of them. Arthur narrowed his eyes at the man, he was probably going to need to lasso Austin up at some point, just to keep him from interrupting anymore in the future.

— To Be Continued

**Notes for the Chapter:**

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	8. Chapter 8

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> You save a mysterious man who is dying on a mountain. Finding out he has Tuberculosis, you use your knowledge and skills with herbs and natural remedies to save him from death and help nurse him back to health. As he slowly starts to recover, you can’t help but wonder: Who is this man? Why had you found him the way that you did, beaten and ill? Only time, patience … and perhaps love … will tell.

The food was absolutely delicious.

Fried Muskie, with diced potatoes that you had grown in your garden and thick creamy butter that you’d made from the goats’ milk. You cut another piece out of the fish and placed the meat on your tongue, nearly moaning at the taste. “This is so tasty, Austin!” You said cheerfully as you looked across the table at him.

He smiled at your compliment. “Y’all are the ones that caught the fish, I only cooked them. Not to mention you’re the one who spiced them with those herbs of yours,” he said with a teasing grin, lifting one of his brows in amusement.

It was true, you thought with a smile. Some of the herbs you grew in your garden were not just for medicinal means, but also for adding different tastes. Sage was definitely one of your favorites.

The air was silent as the three of you sat at the kitchen table, the sound of utensils on plates creating the only noise in the cabin for several minutes. You couldn’t help but occasionally look over at Arthur to observe him, studying how he ate. For such an intimidating and large man, he seemed to have delicate manners when it came to eating, wiping his mouth with the napkin whenever he made the smallest of messes. You weren’t sure, but you thought you could see him giving your brother a hairy look from time to time. There was no doubt in your mind what it was for.

Arthur’s passive aggressive glaring at your brother for his earlier interruption was kind of adorable, you thought honestly. You knew he’d been about to kiss you again back in the stables, but Austin had called out to you from the cabin just before his lips had touched yours.

You blushed as you thought about the fact that you actually would have let him kiss you again … that you’d really wanted him to kiss you again. This man you were just getting to know, a man with a mysterious nature and past. A man who was … in all honesty … truly beautiful.

As he was distracted with dinner, you decided to allow yourself to study his features, to take every detail in that you possibly could. His skin was weathered, tanned, scarred in some of the areas that you could see, especially two thick scars that were plainly visible on his chin, preventing any stubble from growing there.

That chestnut-brown hair that swept over his temples looked so soft, as if the strands would feel as silky as flower petals if you ran your fingers through them. His brows were thick, slightly darker than his hair. His short brown beard on his square jaw was scruffy, and you remembered how rough it had felt for that brief moment against your skin. And dammit, those eyes of his … they truly looked like two unique gems, as if emeralds and sapphires had decided to merge and become two multicolored green-and-blue diamonds.

How could any man possess so many gorgeous features at once?

Then finally … those lips, looking so pink and lush like the pink carnation flower. Truly, they looked as soft as one, too. But they had been rough, the feeling of their texture and warmth coming back into your mind. You found yourself suddenly wondering what they would feel like in other places as well …

You shook your head mentally — hard. Why on Earth were you thinking this way about a man you were trying to help recover from a disease that had nearly claimed his life not more than a month ago? You felt ashamed, embarrassed that you would dare have any sort of intimate thoughts about your own patient. Well, not a patient, really, but he might as well be one since you were treating his health. Of course, he’d been the one to kiss you, and … and you had wanted it, but — it wasn’t right. Arthur’s health needed to come first, not your desires.

“So, Arthur,” Austin’s voice interrupted your thoughts, bringing you back into reality. You looked over to see that both Arthur and Austin had actually finished their meals, while you were still only halfway done. How long had you been daydreaming?

Arthur turned his gaze to look at Austin, his deep drawl a soft rumble, “Yeah, feller?”

Austin set his utensils down on the table, reaching out for the napkin to wipe it across his own mouth and chin. He set it down and took a deep breath, as if he were bracing himself for what he was about to say next. After a few moments he finally met Arthur’s gaze, “I know I mentioned this earlier, but I was wonderin’ … if you could take me hunting tomorrow mornin’? Show me how to track and kill game properly? I thought the sooner we could start, the better.” He looked back down at his empty plate, as if he were nervous about Arthur’s answer. He was scratching his cheek again, that gesture he made every single time he was nervous.

You knew what was going through Austin’s mind. For the past month your brother had been nothing but a dumbass, in all honesty. Showing no manners or respect for the man in any form whatsoever. You knew he had his own reasons, but to you they were more like excuses. Arthur hadn’t deserved to be treated by Austin the way he had. Not in the least bit. Even though Arthur had offered the favor earlier, Austin still seemed hesitant to be asking him about it.

Then abruptly you absorbed his words and their meaning. “Absolutely not, Austin!” You said firmly before Arthur could say anything, placing your utensils down hard. You couldn’t help it, but you felt a little bit of anger sweep through you. Arthur was still sick, his body still fighting off the remaining bacteria that was left in his body. There was absolutely no way you were going to let him go out there in the wilderness where there were unknown dangers. Out there, he was at so much risk of getting hurt. What if he got attacked by a wild creature? What if he slipped and fell off a cliff? What if he drowned? What if he got himself cut on a branch? What if —

You paused, realizing that some of your worries were actually getting rather ridiculous. But … still … you found yourself deeply concerned for his safety. Since his body was still medicated, it wouldn’t be able to handle much adrenaline. God forbid, what if they ran into something like a grizzly bear on their hunting trip? Any wounds a wild creature could inflict on Arthur could possibly hurt his chances of recovering fully. He needed every ounce of strength, every drop of blood he possessed if he was going to heal fully.

Austin looked over at you, a stunned expression on his face from your sharp reaction. Even Arthur turned his head to meet your furious eyes.

“Arthur needs rest, alright? That’s all I want him to worry about, you’re just goin’ to have to make do with what you know for the next few months, alright?” You shook your head, lowering your eyes to your half-finished plate. “I mean, you’ve been huntin’ on your own for three years, what’s a few more months?” You took several more bites to keep from saying something you might regret.

“Y/N, it’s nearing the end of September now … it’ll be winter before he’s even fully recovered. I thought that maybe the sooner I can get better at huntin’, the sooner and quicker I can be with catchin’ what we need to stock up for the winter season.”

Shaking your head again, you lifted your gaze to look him straight in the eyes, letting him know exactly how upset you were. “Austin, if he goes out there and gets hurt, it’s going to effect how his body will heal.”

“Y/N,” Your brother’s voice lowered in tone, as if he were trying to push some sort of reason onto you, “I just want him to teach me how to track. I swear we won’t do anything more than that.”

Arthur intervened before you could answer. “Guess I’m up for that,” he said as he lifted his shoulders in a single shrug, scratching at his jaw with the back of his thumb, “would be a welcome change to get out of this cabin for awhile, get a lay of the land.”

Your eyes widened at his response and you jerked your head in his direction, shooting him a glare. “Arthur! I need you to stay here and rest!” You weren’t yelling at him yet, but dammit, you were about to if they both kept acting like idiots with this stupid idea. Didn’t they realize how risky this was?

“Dammit, woman, I’ll be fine,” Arthur groaned with a sigh of exasperation, his face already looking exhausted as if he didn’t want to argue, “I’ve been cooped up here for too damn long, anyway. It’s ’bout time I head out there and see some of the world again.” He reached an arm up and ran his fingers through his hair, pushing some of it back from his face. “I’ll tell you what, darlin’, if we promise to keep to just trackin’, will you let me leave then?” His blue eyes lifted to yours at his question, waiting for your answer.

After he shot a glare at Arthur for calling you that endearment again, Austin turned to look at you with hope in his eyes, no doubt waiting for a yes as well.

You lowered your head, using your fork to play with the food left on your plate. Arguing with your brother was one thing, but even Arthur wanted to get out of here, you thought worriedly. But truly, could you actually blame him? He’d been stuck here for weeks, barely seeing what was outside the walls of this cabin. It would probably be good for him to get out there for a while.

‘Get a lay of the land,’ as he put it.

The only problem that kept you from wanting to accept his wish, however, was the fact that you knew his body wouldn’t be able to handle any danger they might come across. Adrenaline was a terrible thing on a weak body, and stress could negatively effect any sort of healing process an animal body was going through, so why would a human body be any different? If anything terrible happened, if he ended up having to defend himself from a wild attack, his body and muscles could actually have major problems. What medicine and herbs were running through his system would get his heart and blood pumping too fast, risking any number of things.

But even with all your concerns, you knew that no matter what you said, Arthur would still probably not listen, so why not just give him the freedom he wanted? It was better than denying it from him, especially if he was going to take it anyway. You knew that he was just that kind of man, that no one could truly keep him from doing what he wanted to do, no matter who they were.

You were extremely worried though, so you were going to try and strike a deal with them. You let out a deep breath, raising your gaze back up to meet both men. “I’ll make a deal with you.”

They both looked at you expectantly.

“As long as you don’t travel too far. No more than two miles, you hear me? And keep close to the trails. If I somehow find out that you travelled off of them, I will poison you with my herbs myself, Austin. Do you hear me?” Your tone was completely stoic, demanding absolutely no nonsense. Of course you would never actually kill you older brother, but Arthur’s safety was your top priority. And if anything ended up happening to him under your brother’s watch? You would definitely make sure that Austin would live to regret it. “And there will be absolutely no hunting. I’ll let you take your gun with you for defense, but don’t you dare think about huntin’ any large game, you hear me? Tracking only.”

Austin’s face positively glowed, completely unfazed by your threatening tone. “Thank you so much, sis. I swear to you we will do everything you ask.”

“Which is … ?” You wanted to clarify that your brother memorized and knew everything you’d asked of him to do.

“No more than two miles, stick to the trails, no huntin’ allowed, trackin’ only.” He listed them off with his fingers, lifting them up one by one with each demand. Arthur smiled in amusement, as if he were entertained by the minor quarrel the two of you were having.

You nodded then stood up, clearing the dishes off of the table and sticking everything in the sink. “Arthur,” you said as you turned the faucet on to begin washing the plates. “After I’m done here, I need you ready for another check-up, alright?”

Arthur sighed roughly as he leaned back in his chair and closed his eyes, “You sure I need another so soon?” He asked, looking over at you with a playful but annoyed look in his eyes as he lifted a single dark brow, his voice carrying slight indignation in his tone. “I feel fine, woman. Also I’m gettin’ pretty sick of those things.”

“Yes, and you will get sick — even more so — if you don’t let me do them.” You kept your response firm, authoritative. He needed to know that you weren’t going to take any more crap from either of them, especially tonight. You had just agreed to let Austin take Arthur out of the cabin and far out into the wilderness, where possible dangers lurked. No amount of words or promises was ever going to comfort you for the rest of the night, not until they returned home safe and sound from their trip tomorrow. “So, if you’d be so kind,” you said sweetly, rather with some venom to go with that sugar, “I would greatly appreciate it if you would go into the sitting room and get yourself comfortable.” You pointed toward the door to the sitting room with the large knife you were holding, shooting sharp darts at him with your gaze.

He grinned at your response, obviously entertained by the big-boss-lady you had turned into. He held his hands up in surrender. “Alright, alright. Dammit, darlin’,” he said, standing up from his chair.

Austin glared up at him, “I thought I told you to stop callin’ my sister that, cowpoke.”

Arthur looked down at him, his large stature giving off nothing but threatening intimidation. “Now you need to shut that damn mouth of yours unless you want to lose them teeth, son.” He growled, and Austin’s eyes widened, a hint of fear showing in them. But Arthur just grinned and patted Austin’s shoulder hard with an open palm. “I’m just needlin’ ya, boah. I know you’re just protectin’ your sister.” He tucked a hand on his belt as he made his way into the sitting room, mindfully closing the door behind him.

Austin looked back at you, giving you a weird smile. “You know, Y/N, in all honesty, that man looks more and more dangerous with each passin’ day.”

“And yet you’re goin’ on a huntin’ trip with him tomorrow,” you teased, unable to let out a small laugh as you finished up washing the last utensil and placed it on the drying rack. “A little one-on-one time with the big, dangerous man. Lucky you.” You turned to face him, propping your hip against the counter of the sink as you crossed you arms, narrowing your eyes at your brother. “Now don’t you dare think that I’m in the least bit happy about this.”

His smile lowered, turning into a frown, “I know you’re not, Y/N. But we need to start thinking about this. Autumn is nearly here, and then it’s going to be winter. It will be much harder to hunt during that time. We both know it, we’ve been through it before, and now that there’s three of us, well — ” He reached around his head and rubbed at the back of his neck. “I need to start stocking up what I can find. Plus, if Arthur starts showin’ me how to track early on, it might give me a better chance of huntin’ in the winter time.” He lowered his eyes for a second, then raised them back up at you after a few moments, “Arthur’s probably not going to stay with us forever, you know.”

Those last words slammed into your heart like a bag of bricks, slashing through your chest like a hundred daggers. Even though you knew your brother was right, you didn’t like to think about that inevitable fact.

You didn’t want to think about Arthur leaving, and truly that thought surprised you … this man you barely knew, who’d been living with you for less than a month … and you already couldn’t bear the thought of him being gone.

But eventually, once Arthur was fully recovered, you were certain he was going to leave. As far as you knew, he had never mentioned anything about permanently staying after he was better. The thought of him no longer being here actually scared you, and you shook your head hard. “I know what you’re saying, Austin, I just want him to be safe.”

Your brother nodded, and he stood up slowly, making his way around the table to walk over to you and pull you into a hug. “I understand what you’re feeling, Y/N. I promise you, we’ll stick to the trails, and we won’t do anything stupid, alright?”

You nodded against his chest, accepting his warm embrace as you wrapped your arms around him to return the hug. “Thank you, Austin. I’m sorry, I’m just very worried for him.”

“I know.”

••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••

Arthur sat on the large couch, leaning forward with his elbows on his knees, watching the flames in the fireplace as they licked greedily at the firewood, all the while waiting for Y/N to come in and start another check-up on him. He looked down at his inner arm, noting all the tiny holes that had healed where she kept sticking those damn needles in. Dammit, his Tuberculosis was going to leave scars on him in more ways than one. There was no doubt about that, he thought with a sigh.

But of course, he’d rather have scars than be dead, he thought. Though, if he were completely sincere with himself, he would somewhat actually prefer death over some of them … such as his memories. He couldn’t bear to think about all he’d lost, the pain of emptiness like an aching black hole in his heart.

Arthur knew that he eventually had to decide what he was going to do with his life once he was fully recovered, now that there was no longer anything or anyone to go back to.

He’d thought several times about staying here with Y/N and Austin, at least for a little while. He knew he needed to repay them for all they’d done for him in what ever way he could, but there was no way he would allow himself to stay permanently. He refused to become a burden on them. He wasn’t going to let himself take advantage of their hospitality after his body was completely healed. Hell, he felt like a useless idiot even now.

Arthur closed his eyes in a sigh, thinking back to that mountain again, doing his best to remember every single thing that had happened. He recalled sending John away before facing off with Micah and Dutch. He remembered Dutch turning his back on him despite the years of service and loyalty that Arthur had given him. After that, all he could remember was trying to crawl, dragging his body across the hard and cold ground until it had completely given out, his muscles shutting down as he’d felt his heart start to slow, his breath becoming more and more shallow as he’d collapsed … turning his face to watch the sun just as it had begun to peak over the horizon.

All he could remember after that was a peculiar taste on his tongue, and the feeling of being lifted into the air. The next time he’d opened his eyes, he could barely make out the face of a woman sitting by his side, and they’d engaged in some kind of conversation before he had passed out again.

This was all so strange, he thought. He was supposed to be dead, and he damn well knew it.

Yet it was absolutely undeniable; this woman had saved his life, and he was still here. Arthur ran a hand across his face, rubbing at his forehead. What the hell was he ever going to do now, he still wondered.

Suddenly he thought of John again, and about the dreams he’d been having of late. Was there some sort of meaning to them that he wasn’t able to pick up on? Why were the dreams always of a deer? What the hell was going on in his mind that he somehow wasn’t aware of?

His thoughts were suddenly interrupted when the kitchen door opened, Austin and Y/N walking through. The man nodded at him as he walked by, heading down the hallway to his bedroom and shutting the door behind him. Arthur looked over at Y/N, reading her somber expression as she walked over to gather supplies from her desk. What the hell had gone down between them, he asked himself. She looked sad for some reason, and he wanted to find out why.

She came over to him and placed the tray of supplies on the nightstand, sitting on the couch next to him. “Alright, Arthur, it’s time,” she said, her voice sounding soft and patient, not matching her sad expression in the least bit.

Arthur turned his upper body to face her as she put on the stethoscope and started running the disk over his chest. “You okay?” He asked, curious as to what might’ve transpired to put her in the mood she was in now. Of course he’d left the room when she’d been slightly upset. But this seemed different, as if she’d been told some sort of terrible news. What, though? He turned to gaze down the hall. Had her brother done or said something to hurt her? Just the possibility alone started to boil his blood. “Austin didn’t do somethin’ to hurt you, did he?”

She snapped her head up to meet his gaze, surprise in her eyes and in her voice, “Of course not, Arthur. Why would you think that?”

He lowered his eyes to watch her move the disk around his chest. “I don’t know, you just seem — ” He shrugged, “Ah, never mind.”

She lifted her lips in a small smile, “Well, thank you for your concern, but I’m fine. Austin didn’t do anything, so don’t you worry, alright? Now take some deep breaths for me, you know how it goes.”

Arthur felt his lips stretch into an amused grin as he did as she asked, taking in as much air as he could into his lungs before letting it back out. He wasn’t sure he entirely believed her, but he would leave it alone for now, unless she decided to speak about it any further at some point.

“So,” she said as she pulled the disk away, taking off the stethoscope and placing it back on the tray. “Arthur, your heart and lungs are sounding really good. I’m very proud of how well your body has responded to the treatments.” She looked back at him as she held up an empty hypodermic needle for him to see. “Now we’re going to try something a little different tonight — I need to take some of your blood.”

Arthur’s heart skipped at those words. This was definitely new. What the hell did she need to draw his blood for?

As if Y/N had read his mind, she added, “Once I get some of your blood, I can analyze it with my microscope to see how much Tuberculosis bacteria is still left in your body. This procedure is what I use in order to tell how an animal is doing during its healing process … it should be about the same for a human.” She looked away when she said that last part.

Was that a hint of nervousness he’d detected in her tone?

“Well ... ,” Arthur studied her features for a bit before he finally decided to give in, resting his arm on his thigh palm-up. “Have at it, then, honey.”

He trusted her. She’d never given him any reason not to.

She smiled at him gratefully, before she leaned over and disinfected the area on his skin with pure alcohol, wiping it clean with a fresh cloth.

Bringing the tip of the needle over his skin, she prodded around with her finger until she found his thick vein, and then pushed the point in. Arthur flinched, grimacing and releasing a deep grunt as she pulled back the plunger, slowly drawing his blood into the tiny glass barrel.

After several seconds passed, she finally pulled the needle out and pushed the cloth against the small fresh wound she’d left behind to keep any more blood from escaping. “Could you hold that in place for me, please?” She asked him.

Arthur obliged her, pushing the thing down hard with his other hand. She gave a nod of appreciation and stood up, bringing the vial that was now filled with his blood over to the large metal microscope on her desk. She dispensed the blood into some kind of glass tray before placing it underneath the lens, looking through the scope. He watched as she played around with his blood using a small metal tool, stirring it around.

He found himself extremely curious with her actions. “Just what are you doin’ there?” Arthur asked.

She didn’t answer, appearing to be lost in some kind of deep thought. Her expressions changed as moments passed by, as if she were thinking really hard about whatever she was seeing. Once she was finished, she stepped back and took everything over to the sink to to clean and disinfect them. Completing that task, she washed her hands and walked back over to him. “Well, Arthur,” she said as she sat back down next to him, she turned her gaze to his as she spoke the next words. “I do still see a little bit of bacteria left in your blood, but I expected that, so it’s no surprise. What’s still there appears to be dying off, they looked very weak, but it’ll be at least another couple of months before everything is all cleared up … I would really rather you stay here tomorrow, but I’ll leave that up to you.” She raised a hand to rub at her shoulder, as if she were trying to hold herself back from adding anymore onto that last statement.

Arthur looked at her, baffled. “You could see it in my blood?” He couldn’t help the gravel in his voice from the surprise he felt.

Y/N nodded, “Of course, microscopes are incredibly helpful when it comes to seeing what our naked eyes can’t.”

Arthur found himself unable to say anything so he just nodded, feeling like a complete dumbass sitting next to a woman that kept managing to surprise him. Truly, she was too damn smart for her own good, he thought, unable to even begin to understand her way of thinking and how she saw the world.

After a long silent moment passed between them, Y/N reached back over to the tray and held that familiar pot out to him again, but this time she didn’t meet his gaze as he took it from her hand.

“More honey, huh?” Arthur couldn’t help but let out a small chuckle, lifting the lid and grabbing the spoon from the jar. She didn’t say anything as he began taking the sweet substance into his mouth. Apparently honey was truly one of nature’s strongest natural remedies for treating Tuberculosis, who the hell knew?

As he focused on the taste, he found himself thinking about something else that was just as sweet, something else he would like to taste. Someone else. A certain kind of other honey. Arthur lowered his eyes to stare down at Y/N’s lips as he swallowed, studying how luscious they looked, thinking again about how soft they’d felt against his own.

Dammit, what the hell was wrong with him? He squeezed his eyes shut, his brows tightening. He barely knew this woman, so why did he find himself so drawn to her? Because she’d saved his life? Because she was helping to cure him of a deadly disease? Because she was possibly the smartest person he’d ever met? … Because she was absolutely beautiful … ? … Because she’d shown him more tenderness and care than anyone else ever had in a long time … ? He lifted his lids to look at her again, and she blushed. She must’ve read his expression, and he wondered what his face looked like to bring out that reaction in her.

Suddenly she cleared her throat, standing up from the couch. “Um — I have something for you.” She left the sitting room and disappeared down the hallway, leaving him alone to feel like a complete idiot. Of course he’d scared her off, he thought, completely unsurprised and wanting to punch himself in the face for doing so.

A minute later she came back with some kind of large dark red cloth in her hands. “I meant to give this to you sooner, but I wasn’t sure you wanted them since you already had the other pair.” She came over and held it out to him. Arthur took it and spread out the soft cloth to see that it was a dark red union suit. He lifted his gaze up to hers, giving her a questioning look, “You’re givin’ this to me?”

She lifted a finger to her hair to twirl around in her strands, as if she were nervous, “Well, I placed an order in the catalog for my brother before we moved up here, but when it came in it was too big for him. He didn’t mind though, said he really appreciated the thought but he wasn’t really of fan of red, anyways. Of course I ordered him another one after that, that one ended up suiting him perfectly and it was his favorite color: dark blue.” She let out a small giggle and gestured at the union suit. “This should fit you just fine. Neither of us have any use for it, so I want you to have it.”

She looked nervous, like she was waiting for him to turn it down. But he wasn’t going to do that. “Well, thanks for the gift, Y/N,” he said as he gave her a grateful smile, folding the cloth up and placing it on his lap. “I think red’s a great color,” He patted the cloth, “looks good on just about anythin’, if you ask me.”

She let out a small laugh, which lifted his spirits. Her laugh was truly one of a kind, a sweet little jingle that heated his blood. “I’ll go ahead and take your clothes for you after you’ve put it on, I’m planning on doin’ laundry tonight anyways.”

Arthur squinted at her, “Need any help with that, honey?”

She blushed slightly, turning her eyes away. Arthur knew he was never going to get tired of calling her that, if only to see that same adorable reaction every time. “No, thank you. It’s not a hassle, really. It allows me some time to think. Just leave your clothes sitting outside and I’ll see to them.” She fiddled with the collar of her blouse, then said sweetly, “Well, anyway, you have a good night, Arthur.” She looked at him then, and her eyes glowed as those lips lifted into another beautiful smile.

Damn, he wanted so badly to kiss her again, he thought, he wanted to taste those lips of hers once more. But before he could think to make any sort of move, she turned away and made her way back towards the kitchen.

Arthur watched as she shut the door softly behind her, leaving him alone on the large couch.

He looked down at the soft red fabric she’d just gifted him with. Running his hand across it, he noted how silky and smooth the texture felt underneath his fingers. There was no doubt in his mind that this cloth had definitely cost a pretty penny. So she had ordered this before she’d moved up here?

Arthur remembered her talking about having grown up on a plantation, and he found himself wondering where exactly she was truly from. Who was she really, he thought. Did she actually come from a family of wealth? If so, what exactly happened that made her want to leave? He recalled her saying something about ‘not wanting to stay cooped up’ there. But that couldn’t be all there was to it, so what was the true reason? He couldn’t fathom why anyone would want to give up a life of luxury to live out in the damn woods …

If anything, Arthur thought, she was just as mysterious to him as he no doubt was to her.

Later that night  
Arthur found himself standing in the middle of a heavy fog, unable to see anything past the thick haze surrounding him. He looked around, but there was absolutely nothing. No sound, no voices, just complete silence. Where the hell was he now?

Suddenly the sound of a stick snapping resonated in the distance, and Arthur jerked his head in the direction he’d heard it from. But nothing seemed to give itself away, and he started to feel his agitation grow. “Who’s out there?” He shouted, swiping violently at the thick mist with his arms, trying to take a few steps forward as he did so.

A wet drop landed on his cheek, and Arthur looked up. It was starting to snow, the frozen drops beginning to fall slowly from the sky around him, and the ground beneath him quickly began to get covered in a thick blanket. What in the damn hell was going on? He squinted, trying his best to see anything, anything at all, but he could see nothing but the color white. White fog, white ground, white snow, white sky. Why was there so much damn white?

Feeling nearly helpless, though he hated to think of himself in that term, Arthur began to walk forward, taking one slow step at a time. He wasn’t sure what he would walk into, or hell, there was probably a large cliff up ahead for all he knew, but he couldn’t stay here. He continued swiping at the fog in an effort to clear up a small path in front of him, but the effort did nothing to help clear his vision what so damn ever.

Time seemed to pause, and Arthur kept moving, feeling the snow land on his shoulders and hair as he continued through the fog.

Arthur stopped, spotting a dark shadow in the distance. From what he could barely make out, it looked like a creature of some kind … the deer again? He moved closer, crouching low to the ground in hopes of not spooking it as he slowly began to approach. As the distance grew shorter, the fog began clearing up, and Arthur suddenly found himself mesmerized.

Not a deer.

It was a wolf.

The dark creature had long, greasy black fur, and Arthur couldn’t see its face as it wandered over the peak of a tall hill off in the distance, sniffing at the cold ground as if it were searching for something. The wolf didn’t seem to notice him, but Arthur could sense some sort of strange feeling coming from the creature, as if it was lost or afraid, or maybe both. It even looked like it was ready to attack anyone that came near it to defend itself.

He took another step towards it, somehow feeling drawn to its presence. Despite not making a sound, the wolf’s head jerked up and looked in his direction, and Arthur stilled, his heart feeling like it had suddenly stopped beating in his chest.

Two large scars ran across the right side of the wolf’s face … its eyes — they were completely white, as if it was blind?

Could it see anything?

The wolf growled, baring its sharp teeth in his direction. Arthur raised his hands up, an attempt to try and tell the creature that he meant no harm — even though he had no clue why doing so was his first thought.

The dark creature crept backwards, withdrawing slowly as if it were afraid of him, but shouldn’t it be the other way around?

Arthur somehow felt compelled to approach, and he tried to move forward in an effort to get closer.

The wolf sprinted, turning its tail away as it fled from him.

“Wait!” Arthur called out, and suddenly he was able to run, drifting quickly through the heavy snow and fog so he didn’t lose sight of the black wolf. He had no idea why he was chasing after it, but hell, there was nothing else here! And those scars …

As he ran through the fog, tall trees began to appear. One to his left, two to his right, until he was running through a dense snow-covered forest.

Arthur stopped in his tracks, trying to catch his breath. There was a sudden sharp pain in his lungs, and he felt like he could barely breathe. He looked around as he panted, and he saw the wolf standing not too far off.

It had stopped. Its ears were perked up, and it appeared as though it had spotted something.

Arthur squinted in the direction it was looking … and there he saw the deer.

The large animal was grazing at a small patch of green grass, the only color in this world of black and white, as if it was the only source of life here. Arthur looked back over at the wolf, and he noticed that it suddenly looked hungry.

His eyes widened and he tried to move forward, somehow compelled to stop the impending attack.

But that’s not what happened.

No.

The deer lifted its head from the grass and looked over at the wolf, as if it had known all along that the feral beast was nearby.

Arthur noticed it instantly — the deer had his own eyes again. That familiar reflection of blue adding color to the land devoid of any other next to the green grass. It was almost as if it represented something, but for what? The deer? The wolf?

The wolf and deer seemed to take each other in.

Long moments passed, and Arthur couldn’t move, his body caught in some kind of invisible hold.

The black wolf began to creep forward, and the deer actually took a step in the predator’s direction. Both of the animals seemed to hesitate at first, but as they drew closer to each other, some kind of bond began to form.

The deer leaned forward as the wolf reached out, each of their noses nearly touching as they stared at one another, cloudy eyes meeting blue.

Silence.

Both of the creatures seemed at peace, as if they understood each other in some kind of mysterious way. The deer lifted its head away and began walking in no particular direction, merely meandering as the wolf decided to follow.

Arthur felt his body suddenly start to become air, as if he were being lifted into some kind of haze as he watched the unlikely pair saunter side by side through the trees.

What happened next, Arthur couldn’t explain.

A sharp gunshot sounded out, followed by a loud thunderous noise that echoed through the sky like a storm. Both of the animals jerked their heads, as if they had no clue where the ominous sounds had come from. The deer nudged the wolf’s neck and began to run, the wolf following close behind. Arthur felt himself being carried with them, an invisible aura able to do nothing but spectate what played out before him.

The two ran for days, it felt like. Weeks, months, years … What was only just a short time felt as though it stretched on forever, and they just kept on running, continuing to dodge whichever direction the repeating gunshots were coming from. Faster and faster they ran together, until the land around them was nothing but a white and gray blur.

That gray blur suddenly became green, and the sky turned from white to blue. Soon after the deer and the wolf suddenly ran into a clearing of open grassy fields, the land beyond completely covered in lush greenery and flora. They ran until both of them reached a cliff.

The wolf stopped right on the edge, but the deer leapt over it and into the air, suddenly fading away, disappearing abruptly from the wolf’s side into a glimmering gold mist.

The black wolf was left alone to stand over the tall cliff, looking down on what lied before him. Arthur looked over the landscape, taking in what the wolf saw.

It was some kind of ranch, a place that somehow felt welcoming and safe … he looked over at the wolf and saw them then and there.

John’s clear brown eyes.

— To Be Continued

**Notes for the Chapter:**

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	9. Chapter 9

It was well past midnight, and the crickets were now singing their sweet familiar melody for everyone and everything to hear. The stars above were bright and colorful in the sky, reds and greens mixing with blues and purples. The full moon provided plenty of soft blue light across the landscape, the canopies of the trees casting shadows on the ground from the moonlight.

The small night wind felt cool against your skin as you sat near the stream in a small chair, hunched over a small metal tub as you scrubbed one of Austin’s shirts against the washboard. All the while you hummed to yourself lightly, as if you were adding your own musical notes to the crickets’ song.

Finally you reached over to grab the last piece of clothing that you needed to wash, which was Arthur’s blue long-sleeve shirt. The fabric was extremely worn and weathered, dark dirt stains marked in several areas, especially in the front where two large stains on either side were plain as day.

Truthfully you’d been taking your time washing the clothes, unable to help but worry what the next day was going to possibly bring. You weren’t even sure if you were even going to be able to sleep tonight with such troubling thoughts racing through your mind.

You shook your head as you began scrubbing Arthur’s shirt, soaking it in the soapy water as you ran it across the washboard. You scrubbed the cloth hard, trying to wash the dirt stains on the front of the blue shirt, but no matter how hard you tried they refused to come off, and you couldn’t help but wonder how long they’d been there — what they were from? But you weren’t going to ask, that was just none of your business.

All you could do was tell yourself that everything would be alright, and you had to trust both of them that they were going to be safe. You had no idea why you were worried so much, knowing that Austin left on his own all the time only to come back safe and sound.

But this felt different somehow … You knew that Arthur was still sick, both physically and slightly mentally, and that fact alone had you feeling on edge. Austin had never brought anyone along on his hunting trips, and the only times you ever rode out with him was to study and search for new herbs, though those trips were few and far between.

That last thought suddenly brought another: What would have happened if you hadn’t decided to travel with Austin that night? Arthur would have … You flinched, refusing to think about such a horrible thought a second longer.

He was here, alive … safe, and that was all that mattered now.

Finally finished with washing all of the clothes, you stood up and walked over to the clothesline by the garden, getting to work on hanging up all the wet garments onto the wires. The wind was quite strong tonight, so there was no doubt they would be dry and ready by morning.

Minutes later you were clipping the last piece of clothing to the line, and you turned and picked up the now empty bin, propping it on one of the outer walls of the cabin. Next you went over to the tub, emptying the soapy water onto the rocks near the stream, then came back and propped it next to the other bin.

You wiped your hands on your jeans, pleased that the time-consuming chore was now completed. No doubt Austin and Arthur were going to be happy having fresh clean clothes for their trip.

At some point you knew that Arthur was going to need new sets of clothes, but that would require a two-day trip to the nearest small town that had a clothes shop, and you wanted him to be able to travel with you so that he could decide on getting whatever he wanted for himself. You had plenty of money stashed away in a lockbox inside the back of one of your desk drawers, something your father had insisted on giving to you before you’d left, but you’d never really needed it since you and your brother had lived mostly off the land and with what you’d taken from home all those years ago.

You would’ve lended Arthur your brother’s clothes, but the man was so much larger than Austin, his limbs much thicker, and his body much taller by nearly half a foot. Until the time came to make that journey to town, all you could do for now was keep washing the clothes he had.

You rubbed at your eyes as you stepped up onto the porch and approached the front door. It had been a couple hours since you’d left the cabin to work on the laundry, so there was no doubt that Austin and Arthur were both well asleep by now. Opening the door as quietly as possible, you stepped into the sitting room and shut it softly behind you.

As you made your way silently past the couch to head to your bedroom, you heard a small deep groan. You looked over toward the couch, but you couldn’t see Arthur since the large piece of furniture was facing away from you, the backrest obstructing your view of him entirely.

You considered leaving him be, but then there was another groan, this one sounding much more harsh, as if he were in some kind of pain.

Suddenly worried, you headed over, making your way around the couch so you could see Arthur fully.

His face was tight, his brows drawn down, his lips pulled back from his teeth in a grimace. His arms and legs twisted underneath the blanket that covered him, as if he were trying to fight some kind of invisible force that had taken a hold of him.

Then he cried out at that moment, a name passing his lips.

“John!”

The rough sound made you flinch. There was so much anguish in that single cry, so much pain built up into one single name.

What on Earth was he possibly dreaming about?

Who was John?

What could possibly cause such a tormented sound to come from his throat?

Unable to help yourself, you approached the side of the couch, kneeling at his side so that you could reach out and touch his shoulder softly.

His struggles seemed to slow slightly then, his body’s tension suddenly easing as if it somehow found comfort through your touch. The reaction amazed you.

However, his face was still tight with pain, as if his mind were still being tortured in some way.

Not knowing what else to do, you started to hum lightly, singing the tune of a lullaby your mother had once sung to you as a child right before bed. The familiar melody went through you like warm water, and suddenly you felt yourself getting lost in the soft notes, your own body going loose as you ran your hand up and down Arthur’s shoulder in gentle strokes.

Moments passed, and over the course of the song, Arthur’s face started to soften, the small wrinkles in his forehead and around his eyes slowly beginning to disappear once more as his entire face began to gradually relax.

Eventually, you found yourself bringing your hand up from his shoulder to his face, gently stroking his brow and cheek. A part of you couldn’t believe you were doing this, that you would dare take it this far, but the rest of you didn’t care at that moment.

You only cared about comforting Arthur in any way that you could.

You began to sing the lyrics as you ran your fingers over the smooth skin of his cheekbone, traveling them down through the rough patch of his trimmed beard. The bristles felt so rough and soft at the same time, the short brown hairs slightly curling around the tips of your fingernails.

The color of his skin had been returning over the last couple weeks, filling up once more and replacing the terrible dark and sunken spots with the full healthy flush he’d no doubt had before the disease had tried to steal him away from this world. As a result, his body was beginning to glow more and more with each passing day.

You had to admit, the sight of him slowly but surely returning back to normal pleased you immensely, feeling extremely grateful to the sun and stars that he’d actually made it.

After several long moments into the lullaby, Arthur’s entire body was finally and completely relaxed, his face having gone completely soft, the hard lines and wrinkles now gone from his handsome features.

You smiled down at him, pleased that he finally seemed at peace.

Before you thought any better of it, you stroked a few loose chestnut strands from his forehead, tucking them back as you leaned over and laid a gentle kiss on his forehead, finishing the lullaby with one final verse.

“Now, it’s time to rest.”

•••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••

The next morning  
Arthur woke up to the delicious smell of cooked eggs and fresh-baked pastries, the intoxicating smell invading his nostrils and his senses in the most pleasant way possible. Opening his eyes, he let out a long yawn as he stretched out his limbs, causing the blanket that had been twisted around his torso to fall to the floor.

He sat up, throwing his legs over to place his feet on the cold wood of the floor. Sitting forward, he placed his elbows on his knees as he lifted his hands to his face and rubbed his eyes.

Another mysterious dream, another day on this earth.

“Good mornin’, Arthur!” A voice sounded from behind him, and he turned to see Y/N walking out of the kitchen with a plate full of food in her hands. Today she was wearing a weathered white blouse with faded blue jeans and black boots, her hair tied into an adorable bun. She brought the plate over and placed it on the nightstand next to him. “Did you sleep well?”

Arthur smiled as he rubbed at one of his eyes with the back of his knuckles, “Surprisingly, I did.” He admitted, his voice hoarse from sleep, “Very well, in fact.” He lifted his arms to his sides, stretching them out as he rolled his shoulders and bent back his spine. There was a soft crack, and the feeling instantly loosened the tightness in his lower body. He let out a deep, satisfied sigh as he lowered his arms.

He looked over at the plate of food. “That for me?”

She smiled down at him. “Yes, it’s fried eggs with biscuits. Also, I layered the biscuits with honey. I thought that maybe I could make it a little more interesting for you this mornin’.”

He grinned at her flushed expression, “Is that right?” He reached out and grabbed the plate in one hand, taking the fork with the other. He cut off a piece of the honeyed biscuit and placed it in his mouth. The taste exploded on his tongue, warm and sweet, the texture and flavor of the biscuit all but damn perfect. He chewed, savoring the fluffy bite before he swallowed. “This is good, you make this yourself?” He asked, taking a bite from the fried eggs.

Y/N smiled and nodded, “Made it from scratch. The hens gave us some good batches this mornin’ and I used the goats’ milk that was leftover from last night to mix up with some of the flour and sugar.” She looked down at her lap, her lips raising in a small smile as she tucked a loose strand behind her ear. “I’m glad to hear you slept well.”

Arthur looked up from his plate, turning to look at her as he noticed the odd tone in her voice. A slight blush had appeared in her cheeks, and he wondered what the hell that was about?

•••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••

You couldn’t help the warm blush creep into your face.

When Arthur said that he’d had a nice sleep, you were extremely grateful to hear those words. You’d hated to see his struggles while he’d slept, and to know that your lullaby had helped him to relax meant so much.

You wouldn’t tell him what you did, though, why would you? That would no doubt just cause an awkward situation between the two of you, so you decided it was best to keep quiet about that, at least for now. What would be the point in bringing it up, anyways?

Another thought occurred then, and you recalled Arthur crying out that single name in his sleep last night.

John.

You couldn’t help but wonder what his dream might have been about, who or what had caused him so much pain that he would struggle so much in his sleep. Who was John? What memories did Arthur hold in his mind about this person? Had this man been an enemy? A friend? Family?

You wanted so badly to ask him, but you weren’t quite sure you should, unwilling to risk raising any more pain than he was already going through. No matter how curious you were, it was probably best to leave it alone for now.

But that name … there was no doubt it was going to stick in your head for quite a while, no matter how hard you would try to forget it. Curiosity just might kill this cat.

You watched as Arthur finished the last bite of the honeyed biscuit and placed the empty plate on the nightstand. “Thanks for that, Y/N. That was delicious.” His compliment on your food made you smile as he leaned back on the couch.

Against your better judgement, you allowed yourself to take in his form. Red somehow brought out the coloring in his skin even more, the weathered and scarred parts of him giving away the rough life he’d no doubt led.

The silence in the room seemed to stretch on forever, and you couldn’t help but worry about the day ahead. “Arthur?”

He turned his head to look at you, those sapphire-emerald eyes gazing into yours as he lifted a brow, “Hm?”

You lowered your eyes, unable to concentrate on what you needed to say when those eyes of his seemed to burn right through you. “So … you and Austin are leaving today.” You stated it as fact, but you couldn’t help the worry laced in your tone, and he seemed to pick up on it.

Those thick brows lowered, and the corner of his lips lifted into a small smile. “Don’t you worry about that now,” he said, his voice soft, his deep drawl somehow soothing your troubled nerves. “I ain’t gonna let you brother do anything stupid.”

His words had you letting out a small laugh, but then you absorbed their meaning. “It’s not him I’m worried about, Arthur.” You admitted. His smile faltered at that, and you blushed. “I’m sorry, I don’t doubt your skills or anything like that. I just don’t want somethin’ bad happening to you.”

A few seconds passed, and then he nodded, “I understand that, Y/N. But don’t fret none, you hear? We ain’t gonna be doing nothin’ more than tracking, I’ll make sure of that. If we come across any trouble I’m sure your brother will take care of it just fine.”

He said that last sentence as if you didn’t remember how clearly skilled Arthur was with a gun? The memory of him shooting that jackrabbit in the bushes with so little effort ran through your mind again, and Arthur must’ve been able to tell what you were thinking, because he let out a deep laugh, throwing his head back against the back of the couch. Once his mirth faded, he lifted his head back up to look at you again, “We’’ll be alright, honey.”

You couldn’t help but give a small smile. Your worry did seem a little silly, even though you couldn’t really help it. “So what exactly are you planning to do today?” You asked.

Arthur gave a final chuckle and let out a sigh, turning his head to meet your gaze, “You mean with Austin, right?”

You nodded.

“Well,” he sat up, stretching his legs as he lifted his arms and rolled his shoulders once more. “You said we can’t go no more than two miles from here, but that should be plenty of ground to give your brother a chance to learn a few important things about huntin’.” He scratched his neck with the back of his thumb, “Can’t really believe your brother even asked me at all.”

You couldn’t help another short laugh escape, and you covered your mouth with your palm as Arthur looked at you again. “I’m sorry, Arthur, I know. I’m not laughing at you, but you’re right.” You lowered your hand back down to your lap, “Austin has a lot of pride, so it no doubt took him a lot to swallow it in order to ask you.”

Arthur huffed, “Yeah, well, I did offer first. Ain’t no turnin’ back now.”

You gave a small nod, “He’s never been the best at huntin’, let alone handling a rifle or bow. It’s why it takes him so long whenever he goes out on his trips.”

He narrowed his eyes, as if he were in deep thought. “Does he travel very far? While he’s huntin’?”

You thought about that for a moment. “I don’t think so. I’ve never really thought about that so I never asked, but he always returns within a few hours.”

Arthur gave a small nod, running his fingers through his chestnut-brown hair. “Well, it’s real important when you go huntin’ that you travel far to really quiet areas, far away from any loud noises or signs of civilization. Animals don’t really like living too close to us, especially anything large like deer. When you’re out in the wild, there’s much more chance of findin’ and killin’ what you need.”

You couldn’t help but look at him quizzically then, wondering how he knew all this, especially when things like general stores existed. What did he mean by ‘out in the wild’? Again, what kind of life had he lived? “Exactly how much huntin’ have you done, Arthur?” You asked, unable to hold back the awe in your tone.

He let out a small chuckle, a smile stretching his lips as he rubbed the stubble on his jaw. “Enough. Hopefully your brother is a quick learner. I ain’t a man with much patience when it comes to teachin’, I figure.”

His attempt at humor had you smiling again. Was he, though? You couldn’t help but imagine him trying to teach your brother anything. Austin was never known to be a good student. Every time you had ever tried to teach him something about herbs or gardening, he was never a good listener. Then again, you probably couldn’t blame him for not being interested in plants, big bad man that he was.

A picture played out in your head, and you laughed inwardly when you thought of Austin giving Arthur a hard time as he tried to teach him something, anything. “I’m pretty sure you could get him to listen, Arthur.” You teased, referring to his intimidating nature. You were rewarded with another handsome grin and deep laugh.

“As long as your brother ain’t that much of an idiot, he’ll be just fine.” He teased back. You joined in his laughter, and the two of you sat there for a while afterwards, lost in your own thoughts.

A few minutes passed, and finally you stood to your feet. “All the clothes finished drying on the clothesline this morning, I folded yours and placed them in the wash room for you when you’re ready to change.” You said, gesturing with a pointed finger towards the small hallway.

He gave you a grateful nod, “Thanks, Y/N.”

“You’re welcome, Arthur.” You said with a smile as you reached around him to grab the empty plate. Heading into the kitchen you got started on cleaning up the mess leftover from cleaning. It took about fifteen minutes to clean, clear, and toss everything, so when you came back into the living room Arthur was gone. You looked around and saw him through the window sitting on the porch swing, wearing his normal clothes

He appeared to be lost in thought: His head was turned away, his gaze looking over towards the stream. It was another clear and beautiful day, so the sun shined brightly across the landscape, the water and lush flora reflecting the sparkling light.

You studied his features through the glass, and you couldn’t help but notice the pain that clearly showed on his face now.

Since he didn’t know you were there, you figured, he wasn’t bothering to hide his emotions, no doubt thinking about his past again. As you watched him, his eyes were narrowed, his brows lowered in a hard grimace as he lifted a hand to rub it across his face, letting out a hard sigh.

You couldn’t help but wonder what he was thinking about. Was he thinking if his past? His future? Austin’s words rang in your head at that moment, “Arthur’s probably not going to stay with us forever.”

You squeezed your eyes shut, unwilling to dwell on that terrible thought. You didn’t want to think about Arthur leaving. For some reason, it was just completely unbearable to imagine him no longer being here. Even though he barely knew you, and you barely knew him, it was a feeling you couldn’t explain. A feeling of loss, of sadness. To lose him, it would be like losing a piece of your heart. But why?

You shook your head to clear the thought, forcing your lips to lift in a smile as you stepped outside onto the porch to join him. “Hey, Arthur,” you said, trying to sound cheerful, “You alright?”

He turned his head to look at you, and the raw emotion that was displayed there earlier seemed to fade away as he looked at you. “Hey there, honey, you ready for the day now?”

You noticed he hadn’t really answered you question, but you decided to let it go as you walked over to the one of the wooden beams and leaned onto it, facing Arthur as you crossed your arms over your chest. “Sure am, but I’m still worried about you and Austin, of course.” Arthur glared teasingly at you, his eyes narrowed. He opened his mouth to say something, but you held your hand up. “Don’t even try,” you said with a small laugh, “nothing you say is going to make me feel better until you guys are back here safe and sound.”

He let out a deep chuckle, those eyes of his now sparkling with amusement, “If you say so.”

A long moment passed, and you sighed, “So just tracking. Right, Arthur?”

The big man let out another laugh, “You’re too much, you know that?” Arthur lifted a hand to scratch at his chin, “You just said I can’t say nothin’ to make you feel better.”

You rolled your eyes, more to yourself than at him, “I know.”

Then you looked closer, noticing he was scratching those small scars on his chin, and you couldn’t help but display your curiosity. “How did you get those? The scars.”

His fingers stilled, and he ran his thumb over the thick healed tissue, “You mean these?”

You nodded.

Arthur smiled, leaning back against the porch swing, “Can’t say I remember, it’s been so many years. But, I think you can say I got it in a huntin’ accident.”

You narrowed your eyes, and you couldn’t help the sourness that laced your tone, “Really, Arthur?”

He let out another laugh, clearly entertained at your reaction. “It was long ago, Y/N, I was young and stupid.”

“And you aren’t still?” You couldn’t help but ask, and your words made him laugh even harder.

“I guess you’re right.” He rubbed his throat, his fingers pressing into the skin, “You wouldn’t happen to have a … well, a cigarette, would you?”

You narrowed your eyes at him again. “Arthur, I’m sorry, but the last thing you need right now is a cigarette.” You couldn’t help the worry you felt display on your face, letting your brows draw down in a somber expression, “Your body doesn’t need that right now. Especially your lungs, they still have a lot of healing to do.”

He rubbed at his chest, lowering his gaze to the wooden boards of the porch. “If you say so.” He sounded disappointed, but he didn’t seem to have the energy to argue with you, as if he knew you were right, his health was more important at this time than a simple smoke. “I’ll never understand how you did it, honestly.” He said, taking in a large inhale as if he were still trying to absorb the fact that he could finally take deep breaths without damn well collapsing.

“I don’t think I ever told you this, but I had to stick a tube down your throat.”

It was meant to surprise him out of whatever dark state he was in, and indeed it did as he froze, his eyes suddenly widening, silence stretching between you two. You were looking to shock him with that sudden fact being thrown out, an attempt to distract him from whatever misery he was feeling.

“You did what?” His deep voice raised at the last word, nearly cracking. His astonishment more than clear on his face, those thick brows of his raised til the wrinkles on his forehead were displayed.

“Well,” you said, dragging out the word with a slight tease in your tone in an effort to lighten the mood. “When we took you in, I had to wash your lungs out, so to speak.”

He squinted, as if he thought he hadn’t heard you right. “The hell?” He muttered, his voice sounded raspy as if he could barely use it to speak.

Your attempt at distracting him from his dark thoughts had worked, and you continued, “By the time we brought you here, I knew what you had. So the next thing I had to do was use a certain special tool.” You lifted your hands and held them far apart to give a better idea. “A long tube, it had to go in your throat so the medicine could wash through your lungs.”

He flinched, a groan escaping his throat as he dragged out his next words as if he were being tortured. “Please stop now.”

You couldn’t help but let out a small giggle at his slightly uncomfortable reaction, he’d even lifted one of his big hands to shield his face from your gaze, “Well, it had to be done. It worked, didn’t it?” You teased.

He couldn’t help but return your smile, those rough lips lifting at the corners. Though his own didn’t seem to reach his eyes. “I know.” He admitted under his breath, then he let out a groan, “Just wish you hadn’t told me that bit.”

You grinned, almost letting out another burst of laughter. You decided to change the subject to ease up on him. “While you two are gone I’m gonna care for my garden for a while, do a few things that need to be done with some of the plants,” you turned your head to look out at the stream, “Then I’m thinking about trying some more of that fishing again.”

Arthur lifted his hand to rub at the back of his neck. “You sure you got the hang of that, then?” He asked, his expression lifting in amusement.

You shrugged. “Probably, but a little bit more practice never hurts, right?”

He let out a sharp huff. “Can’t argue with that,” Arthur agreed gruffly, acknowledging your statement with a single nod as he straightened on the swing, then he added, “Just make sure you don’t poke yourself again.”

You glared at him, but you couldn’t help another smile, “You just had to remind me of that, huh?”

He lifted those huge shoulders in a shrug, “You can say it’s a little revenge for teasing me, s’all.”

You nodded with another laugh. “Uh-huh, sure.”

At that moment, Austin came over from the stables, carrying an empty chicken feed sack. “Mornin’, fellers,” he said cheerfully as he draped the thick canvas cloth over the porch fence.

“Mornin’ to ya,” Arthur said, his deep drawl heavy and direct. His expression was now vacant, the earlier amused emotion gone from his face now, as if absolutely nothing had just been exchanged between the two of you.

His sudden somber attitude had you a little confused, and you didn’t know what to think of it. What had happened to the teasing man you had just spent the last several moments with? You turned to face your brother, brushing it aside for now “Morning, Austin. The animals all taken care of?”

“They should be all set for today.” He replied, brushing the dust and the dirt off his pants that he had gathered from the stables. “We’ll be borrowing Lily today, if that’s alright?”

You nodded, “That’s fine, I know you’ll take good care of her.”

“You ready to learn how to track then?” Arthur asked.

Austin smiled and gave a nod, “Absolutely, real excited to learn somethin’ new for once,” he confessed.

Arthur stood to his feet, “We should get started, then. Sun’s only up for so long,” he said.

Austin nodded in agreement, “Yeah, I’ll go get Lily. Would you mind carrying a few things over to the wagon while I attach her? They’re by the steps.” He said, pointing towards a large bag and a few other supplies.

“Sure,” Arthur said with a nod.

You couldn’t help but notice the way he said that word. ‘Shoah.’

Your heart nearly skipped as you realized the moment of Arthur and Austin finally leaving was fast-approaching. The thought of soon being alone for the day was strange and uncomfortable, even though you still couldn’t explain why. You’d been alone for three years whenever Austin went out to hunt, but after having Arthur here for the last four weeks, it was hard to imagine living here otherwise, even for a single day. What was it about him that drew you him? That made you feel like you could no longer imagine being alone, especially without him?

“Let me help you, Arthur.” You said suddenly, shaking yourself out of your thoughts by heading over to the supplies and lifting a couple of the bags alone with a large jug of water.

“You don’t have to do that, Y/N,” Arthur said as he walked over and grabbed the larger bag, he threw it over his shoulder and reached out to try to take the rest of the bags from you.

You backed away, avoiding his big hands, “I know, but I want to,” you said firmly. And with that, you headed over to the wagon with the bag straps slung over your shoulders, carrying the large jug of water with both hands. You couldn’t see it, but you could feel Arthur’s gaze on you. Whether from surprise or something else, though, you couldn’t tell.

You walked over to the stables with Arthur following closely behind you, and after reaching the wagon you went around to the back and placed the supplies into it, Arthur joining in next to you as he set the large bag down along with the others. You turned to face him as you both stepped away from the wagon. The silence seemed to stretch on forever, and tension suddenly started to grow in the air between you.

Finally you couldn’t hold back any longer.

Turning off your mind before you could change it, you threw yourself forward, reaching up to wrap your arms around his neck, right before placing your lips directly onto his.

Warmth.

Arthur’s warmth, it was all you could feel, all you allowed yourself to feel in that moment. His lips were so soft and rough at the same time, and his large body was completely still under your touch. But after a short moment, you felt his arms wrap around you as he deepened the kiss, tilting his head to gain better access as you felt him breathe through his nose, the hot air hitting your cheek as he exhaled.

Honestly, a part of you had expected and feared that he would pull away, and you thanked the sun and stars above that he didn’t.

•••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••

Arthur didn’t know how to react at first, her unexpected action having completely taken him by surprise.

But his surprise quickly faded as he absorbed Y/N’s touch and fell right into her embrace, allowing himself to wrap his arms around her smaller form as he lost himself into the kiss. Even though the intimate contact was the last thing he’d expected, he wasn’t about to allow such a sweet moment pass him by so quickly without taking advantage of it.

Lifting his hand to the back of her neck, he stroked the loose strands of her soft hair between his calloused fingers, relishing how silky they felt against his coarse skin. But the feeling he cared for most at this very moment was her remarkable lips. Damn, he’d missed the sweet taste of them against his own, and he didn’t hold back, savoring them even further as he opened his mouth to run his tongue along her delicious entrance.

She let out a soft moan, her lips parting from the sound and he took it another step further, pushing his tongue into her mouth. He met her tongue with his own, and he couldn’t help the deep groan that escaped his throat at the sweet sensation. What the hell was he doing, Arthur thought, feeling like an idiot having fallen for another woman all over again. Dammit, what was even the point? He knew deep down that he wasn’t worthy of having anyone love him, and he had no doubt in his mind that once Y/N found out about his past, who he’d been, she would instantly turn tail and run without a second thought.

He squeezed his eyes shut, chasing those dark thoughts away and distracting himself by running his burly hands down her body, engaging his mind in every way he could on the feeling of her heat beneath his touch. There was just something about Y/N that drew him to her, her sweet nature, her kind gestures, her delicate but tough behavior.

Arthur couldn’t explain it, and he didn’t feel the need to during this moment.

Y/N let out another low moan as she lifted a hand and ran her fingers through his thick hair, jousting her tongue with his own, pushing her body even tighter against his. He barely resisted the need to grind himself against her body, and she made a small hiss when he suddenly squeezed her hips hard, pulling her lips slightly away from his. “Arthur … ”

There it was. His name on her lips, said with such a deep passion and arousal that it nearly made Arthur want to take her then and there.

And if it wasn’t for her brother barging in, he damn well might have.

“Everythin’ all ready to go?”

Arthur jerked away from her lips with a deep growl, reluctantly pulling himself away and breaking the intimate embrace as Y/N stepped back as well, giving off the impression that they hadn’t actually just been kissing the daylights out of each other.

Austin came out of the stables leading Lily over to the wagon to strap her to the front of the coach. “She’s all set, sorry it took so long. Had to make sure she was fed and brushed for the long day ahead.” He explained as he began tightening the leather straps around the large horse’s body.

Arthur couldn’t help but glare at your brother, and he heard Y/N let out another small giggle, no doubt amused by his annoyed expression. “That’s fine, Austin.” She said, and she almost laughed even harder when Arthur shot that look directly at her. “I’m sorry, Arthur and I were just exchangin’ a few funny jokes.”

Arthur lifted a dark brow at her, entertained by how seamless her lie was.

“Oh?” Austin came over to them, crossing his arms over his chest as he gave off a large smile, “What was one of the jokes?”

For a heartbeat Arthur thought the brother was about to find them out, but Y/N beat him to the punch … so to speak. “Well, Arthur here just explained to me what a Ring Dang Doo is,” she stated flawlessy, as if it were absolute fact. She gave off a smile, humor glowing off her expression as she tucked a finger into her hair, curling at a few loose strands as if she were completely shy and embarrassed by the new knowledge. “I never could quite figure that out before.”

Austin’s eyes widened, then he narrowed them at Arthur. “Y’all mean the song?” He asked, his voice low, “Really, now?”

She rolled her eyes at her brother, “Oh, hush, Austin. I was the one who asked him.”

He looked back over at her and let out a sharp grunt, “Well, you shouldn’t be talking about such things, anyhow. Especially with another man.”

She stuck out her lower lip in a mocking pout. “Aww, but how was I supposed to know that’s what it meant?” She teased.

Austin let out a long sigh, leaning his head back to look up at the sky. “I guess,” he grudgingly agreed. “Just be a little bit more careful next time before you make us both die of embarrassment, you hear?” And with that he turned to the wagon and climbed into the driver’s seat, grabbing his worn cavalry hat from the small storage unit beneath the seat and placing it on his head.

“Oh, that reminds me!” Y/N said, turning away to rush toward the cabin, shouting over her shoulder just before she headed in. “Wait there just a moment!”

A few moments passed, and Arthur could feel Austin’s quizzical gaze on him. Where was a damn lasso when he needed one?

Y/N came back outside and headed over with something in her hand. Arthur narrowed his eyes at what she was holding — a hat?

“Here,” she said, holding it out to him when she reached them.

Arthur stared down at it, and memories instantly came flooding back, even though he couldn’t explain why. It was some kind of worn black-leather cowboy hat, a cross between a Gambler and a Carrigan. A braided brown leather band was wrapped around it, and … a large owl feather was tucked securely into the braid.

The thing was beautiful, he had to admit, and it reminded him a lot of his father’s hat. The one he’d given to John before … well, before that whole shit-show had gone down.

“This was our grandfather’s before he passed.” Y/N explained as she held it out to him, and she looked down as she said her next words, a soft smile on her lips, though it didn’t even begin to reach her eyes. “He didn’t exactly lead the best life when he was alive, but — ” she shook her head as if to clear her thoughts, “Well, you could say he was a wanderer of sorts ... Anyways, I never really had any plans on using it, so … ”

She lifted it up — and placed it directly on Arthur’s head.

The feeling of rough leather over the crown of his head again nearly had Arthur dazed, the sight of a dark wide brim shielding his eyes from the harsh light so familiar it was almost too much for his mind to bear. “Y/N, you didn’t have to — ”

She shook her head, “I insist. It’s just going to gather dust otherwise. You need somethin’ to protect your eyes from the sun, alright?” Her voice was firm, as if she were trying to convince both of them that this was really happening, then she let out a small laugh as she patted the top of the hat, “So if I hear you took it off, I will beat you myself, got it?” She said teasingly.

Arthur couldn’t help but let out a deep laugh at her attempt at humor. “Alright then, darlin’, if you say so.” With that, he reached up and tugged the brim down slightly, giving her the classic cowboy salute.

He was rewarded for his action with another beautiful smile. “You men are too much sometimes,” she tittered, then she reached out and grabbed his shoulder gently, turning him towards the wagon, “Now you two go and conquer the huntin’ grounds, before I change my mind.”

Arthur let her lead him to the other side of the coach, and he climbed up next to Austin.

Y/N smiled up at them as Austin cracked the reins, getting Lily to start moving forward. She waved as they started down the trail into the forest, and Austin and Arthur waved back.

“Please be safe!” She called out after them as they disappeared into the thick trees.

Arthur smiled to himself, lifting a hand to stroke the rough leathered brim of his new hat. A gift to him, from Y/N herself.

For some reason he couldn’t explain, he heard a soft lullaby play deep inside his mind as they travelled further and further away.

. . . . .  
The day is done, the time has come.  
You battled hard, the war is won.  
You did your worst, you tried your best …  
… Now, it’s time to rest.

. . . . .

— To Be Continued

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> [Please let me know what you think, your feedback truly fuels this story!]
> 
> If you want to know what Arthur's new hat looks like, you can see it on Tumblr @the-mill-kat! :) (Each chapter is released a day early on that blog and comes with its own special "cover", so feel free to go check them out.)


	10. Chapter 10

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This one took a lot out of me, but here it is finally! Please leave a comment if you enjoyed, they really fuel this story, they put a smile on my face every single day! Thank you so much for your love and support for Unshaken. I love you all, partners! 🐺❤️🦌

The first mile was peaceful, and Arthur looked around as the wagon strolled down a narrow dirt path through the thick forest. The trees were tall, the hilly landscape like the huge waves of the ocean. His heart almost skipped a beat when he recalled those monstrous walls of water when he was on board that ship. Never again was he ever going on another damn boat as long as he lived.

He took in a deep breath, the smell and feel of the fresh forest air overcoming and relaxing his senses. It felt so good to be out in the wild again, he had to admit. He’d actually found himself missing the familiar scent of wilderness, reminding him of all those nights when he’d been out on his own, hunting, camping, whatever the hell he felt like doing.

Arthur almost laughed to himself then.

He was still here … still alive … still breathing … And the rest of the world believed he was dead, including his old friends — or what was left of them. Anger began to simmer deep within his gut at the thought of Dutch, Micah’s betrayal, what they’d done to him and John, the rest of the gang. He squeezed his eyes shut, lifting his hand to tug at the brim of his new hat, trying to find comfort in the new gift. All he could tell himself was that Marston was safe. The boy was an idiot, sure, but when it came to his family and their safety, Arthur knew nothing would stand in John’s way.

A gentle gust of wind hit him, blowing back his hair and cooling what little heat had begun to grow in his cheeks from the anger he felt. Arthur let out a sigh, allowing the cool feeling to seep into his skin. Looking around, he took in the surrounding views. He knew he was somewhere far north of Roanoke Ridge, but he’d never been up this far before Y/N and Austin had taken him in.

The place was beautiful, he thought, taking in the towering trees around them. He’d learned a few interesting terms from Y/N’s herbalist books. He’d been drawn to those bookshelves of hers many times while he’d been cooped up in that cabin, if only to avoid dying from boredom rather than Tuberculosis. Turned out he’d ended up drawn to the knowledge.

There were so many kinds of trees he could now identify— Spruce, Cedars, Pines, Oaks, and very many Sequoia trees. These trees were extremely tall, forming a thick canopy of leaves far overhead, the sunshine piercing through them in rays, hitting the ground with glowing warm light.

The air smelled so fresh as well, and Arthur took in another deep breath, relishing the real cool feeling in his lungs and the fresh and unique smells around him. There was so much plant life growing up here, all kinds of colorful flowers and foliage dotting the thick green grass everywhere. Damn, this area was gorgeous.

Arthur reached up again and stroked the feather on his hat gently, the bristles soft as, well, a feather. He gripped the crown and took the hat off, lowering it to his lap so he could examine it further. The black leather was worn, but genuine, and he could tell it was made from real cowhide, examining the hundreds of skin pores scattered all over. He ran a finger over the brown braided leather tied around the crown of the hat, similar to how his father’s hat had the looped rope. The texture was rough, but also soft, little furs sticking up here and there from years of use.

Then Arthur looked at the feather, and he squinted, his brows drawing down tight as he stroked the thing with the tip of his finger. It was that of a great-horned owl, a primary feather from the wing, the black and gold colored stripes giving away its identity. He wondered, then … why an owl feather? Maybe it was just something her grandfather hadn’t thought much about, but sometimes a certain kind of bird feather in a cowboy’s hat had a meaning behind it.

Thinking back, he recalled Y/N telling him that her grandfather hadn’t lived ‘the best life.’ That he’d been some kind of wanderer. Arthur found himself being curious as to what exactly she had meant. A wanderer?

What kind of life had the old man lived that had her hesitating to tell him the whole story? And what of the feather?

A cough escaped him, and he lifted a had to cover his mouth, clearing his throat then.

Austin looked over at him with curious eyes, “You alright, cowpoke?”

Arthur couldn’t help but give a small smile as he turned his head to face the young man, narrowing his eyes at him, “I’m just fine, little feller, how ’bout yourself?”

The brother narrowed his eyes in return, showing that he was clearly offended by the term Arthur had used on him, “I ain’t ‘little.’”

Arthur laughed, “Why, sure you is, little feller. As long as you call me a cowpoke, I’ll keep callin’ you little. Sound fair?”

Austin grunted, “Not really.” He reached up to scratch at his cheek, then added, “But you kinda do strike me as a cowpoke.”

“Well, you strike me as little, boah,” Arthur said with a grin, his voice a low rough tone as he patted his chest with an open palm, “And it’ll be much worse if you ain’t careful, son.”

Austin grunted, letting out a huff as if he wasn’t amused with Arthur’s teasing in the least.

Several more moments of silence passed, and Arthur gently placed the hat back on his head.

“So she decided to give you our grandfather’s hat, huh?” Austin asked, his voice sounding a bit sour as he cracked the reins again.

Arthur looked over at him, noting the expression the boy had on his face. He didn’t look angry, exactly, but from his eyes Arthur could tell there was some kind of story. “What do you mean?” He asked.

Austin let out a long sigh, “Well, I know she told you it belonged to our grandfather, and he weren’t the best man when he was alive. I never wanted to touch the damn thing after he died.” He lifted his eyes to meet Arthur’s, “Kinda feels weird that you’re wearin’ it, s’all.”

Arthur took that moment as a chance to find out what he could, maybe the brother could give him some of the information he’d been wondering about. “Who was he?”

Austin let out a sarcastic laugh, “I don’t think that’s for me to say. If she didn’t tell you, I don’t think I should be the one to do so.”

Arthur’s natural instinct would’ve been to reach out and choke the bastard to get the information he wanted. It was a feeling he was used to whenever assholes gave him a hard time, but he could respect the brother for looking after his sister.

Another curious thought occurred to him then, and he couldn’t help but ask, “What were y’all doin’ before you found me up on that mountain?”

He could see Austin freeze up at the question, and the young man turned his gaze over to look at him, “You mean that night? We were travelin’ back from Emerald Ranch. Y/N needed to do a trade for some of the supplies we needed for the horses. We have a few contacts scattered here and there for supplies we need that we can’t get up here, and sometimes we need to travel a ways to get them.

“We were supposed to arrive home sometime in the late evening, but we ran into this strange man on the road. He looked odd, short gray dreads, green bandana around his head, weird old clothing. Said his name was William.”

Arthur stilled at that.

“But anyhow,” Austin continued, not noticing that Arthur had suddenly froze, “he was camping out on the side of the road near Moonstone Pond, and he had all these strange plants he seemed to be workin’ with. Of course, it grabbed Y/N’s attention and he invited us over, so she and I stopped to chat with him for a while.” Austin chuckled as he recalled the memory, “What was supposed to be a small chat ended up bein’ a two-hour conversation. I didn’t really listen to what they were sayin’ since I was wrapped up in a book I’ve been readin’. Eventually I had to pull her away since it was gettin’ late.

“When we were just about to leave, she mentioned a special plant that grew over by O’Creagh’s Run, must’ve been somethin’ they were talkin’ about earlier. I was about to say no, but she gave me this look. She has this thing that she does with her eyes, drives me crazy ’cuz I can’t turn her down when she does it.

"So we headed over there, and I stopped the wagon by the small lake so she could explore the area. I just hung out under a tree with my book to pass the time … That’s when we heard the sounds.”

Arthur lifted his head and narrowed his eyes, “Sounds?”

“Gunshots, shoutin’ — We was goin’ to leave the area as quickly as possible, but — well, Y/N could hear the struggles, fighting, a man in pain, and she couldn’t stop herself.” Austin paused, as if he were deep in thought, “We saw someone runnin’ away from the mountain before they disappeared into the trees. I didn’t really get a good look at the man, but it looked like he had dirty, long blonde hair … someone you knew?”

The fury that suddenly welled in Arthur’s chest didn’t surprise him in the least damn bit.

Micah.

That damned rat.

The rat that weaseled his way in and ultimately destroyed the Van Der Linde gang in such a short amount of time.

Twenty goddamned years of loyalty and service to Dutch, and the old fool had decided to listen and believe someone who’d just joined the gang not half a year ago, a man who’d only been out for himself in the end … Just like Dutch …

“Arthur?”

Austin’s voice interrupted Arthur’s thoughts and snapped him back to reality. “Yeah, sorry ’bout that, kid. Just thinkin’.”

Austin seemed to have picked up on Arthur’s mood, no doubt from the gravel Arthur felt in his throat from the emotion that had just been about to take him over. He couldn’t dwell on such things, not right now. What good did it do?

At that moment another thought occurred to him, “You didn’t want Y/N takin’ me in, did you?” He stated it as fact since he knew the answer, but he found himself wanting to hear what Austin’s response would be.

The boy chuckled darkly, looking straight ahead at the narrow dirt trail. “Honestly, when we heard the gunshots, I thought it was going to be a trap, an ambush of some kind. But Y/N … When we reached that mountain and found you laying on that rock, it was like she didn’t care about anythin’ else in the world but you.” He cleared his throat, “The whole time I was worried that she was going to get herself killed, being so close to a stranger. I feared that something terrible would happen, like you would have a knife hidden on you, or a friend of yours would come leaping out of a hiding spot and shoot her dead.” Austin lowered his head, looking down at his lap as if lost in thought, “To tell you the truth, I don’t know what I would’ve done had that been the case. Y/N is my whole world right now, and she matters to me more than anythin’ else in my pathetic life.”

Arthur’s eyes softened, almost finding himself sympathizing with the poor boy, but he continued to listen.

“When she insisted on taking you to our cabin, I nearly lost it. Watching her take you in and nurse you back to health every day, I couldn’t help but fear for the worst. I still thought you had something evil planned. Some monsters would go to any length to take advantage and trick people like us to get what they want, even if it’s hurtin’ one of their own.”

The boy was smart, Arthur admitted to himself. There were definitely men like that out there, and he should damn well know.

“But when she mentioned you had Tuberculosis, and I began seeing the signs from you, how truly sick you were — I guess … Well, I guess I noticed how stupid I was bein’ at that point — but I was too proud to admit it.

“After you showed your skills with the gun, I realized you could've killed us both whenever you wanted long before that point. The thought was scary, of course, but finally seeing that all you needed was a gun or your bare hands to take us both out and you never did? Well, I guess you can say my stupidity wore off a lil’ bit at that point.”

Arthur grinned, amused with Austin’s confession at how much of an idiot he had been for all the trouble he’d given him.

But could he fully blame Austin? The boy was just looking after his sister, and Arthur couldn’t do nothing but respect him for it. “Don’t hurt yourself too much over it, boah. You’re just lookin’ after her, I understand. In fact,” he leaned back and rolled his shoulders, stretching out the tension in his back, “I kinda like that.”

Austin acknowledged his statement with a small nod and a smile. “I love her, I really do. She’s family, and the most wonderful person I know.” He narrowed his eyes at Arthur and teased, “If you ever hurt her, though, I’ll make sure to shoot you square in the chest, got it?”

Arthur threw back his head and laughed at the threat, “If you say so. But don’t you worry — I ain’t got plans for that.” The fact that the young man had the courage to actually threaten him was truly entertaining, and Arthur couldn’t help but note how much smaller the man actually was compared to him. Arthur had a good six inches on him in height, and a whole lot more muscle, despite the fact that he was still sick. The boy worked hard, but they clearly didn’t eat enough for him to gain a whole lot of meat on his bones. He was about as contrasted as he could be compared to Arthur.

He was grateful Austin had finally swallowed his pride down enough in order to ask him how to hunt. They truly did need it, and he would do his best to teach them. It was the least he could do for him and his sister after everything they’d done for him.

The next several moments were quiet, minus the sound of Lily’s hooves hitting the ground and the tittering of birds high up in the trees.

“So what’s it like livin’ up here?” Arthur asked. “It don’t seem too bad.”

“It ain’t,” Austin replied with a shrug, “It was tough for the first few months, but we managed. Built ourselves a camp, then eventually built ourselves a cabin — then the stables for the horses and other animals.” He cleared his throat, “Of course it’s been hard, what with my lack of huntin’ skills, but Y/N absolutely loves it. She enjoys bein’ surrounded by all the wildlife and plants.”

Arthur found himself suddenly more invested, wanting to know more about Y/N and her passions. “And her garden?”

“She’s been in love with flowers since she was a tiny thing. When we came up here, she brought a few supplies that belonged to our mother, and she got to work on that garden right away.” He let out a small laugh, “What started as a small batch of flowers and herbs turned into a small estate of all kinds of plants. She’s been finding different herbs all over the place and replanting them here for the past three years. Every month it gets larger and larger. I’ll admit, it looks pretty damn beautiful.”

Arthur grinned. “That is does,” he agreed with a nod. It did indeed, Y/N’s garden was a pretty good size, and the colorful shrubbery was a marvel to look at, truthfully. He’d been able to see it out through one of the windows as he’d been recovering on that couch all that time ...

“So how are you feeling, Arthur?” Austin asked, breaking the silence.

Arthur turned his head to look at him, “What?”

Austin lifted a hand to point at his chest, “Your TB, you were coughing a bit earlier, just checking to see how you’re feelin’ now?”

Arthur rubbed his own palm over his chest, “I’m just fine, you’re sister’s got some healin’ magic goin’ on with those herbs of hers.”

The boy’s laugh was loud and sharp, “Y/N has a talent with nature, that’s for damn sure. I swear she may be Mother Nature herself.”

The two men’s laughter echoed through the trees as they travelled further down the trail. A squirrel skittered across the ground, and Arthur watched it disappear into the thick foliage on the other side.

More time passed, until finally they reached a small clearing. Arthur lifted his finger to point over to a small grassy area. “That’s a good spot to start.”

Austin pulled back the reins until Lily stopped, bringing the wagon to a halt. He looked over to where he was pointing and lifted a brow, “Really? Doesn’t seem like the kind of spot wildlife would be, it’s too open.”

Arthur gave him a bewildered look. “Wildlife don’t always need to be in a particular spot in order for you to track ’em, Austin.” He said, his drawl annoyed, letting the young man know through his tone that what Austin had stated was completely idiotic. He got up and climbed down out of the wagon, walking towards the small patch, “This area's got plenty of plant-life, tellin’ you it’s a good spot to start pickin’ up trails.” He narrowed his eyes as he placed his hands on his belt, turning his head as he took in the surrounding forest. “It’s perfect for grazin’, plenty of cover ’round here if they need it."

Austin crawled out of the wagon, grabbing his carbine repeater. It was smart — even though they didn’t need it for killing today, it was better to be safe than get caught off-guard by any wild predators. He walked over to Arthur, and Arthur began walking slowly across the grass, looking down to examine the dirt. “Now whatchu wanna do is look for any signs, footprints, fur, dung, broken branches and whatnot.” He took several steps forward, crouching low so he could see better.

Austin did the same, crouching to help look around for anything they could pick up. “So look for those things, got it.” He said, crawling low to the ground.

“You also wanna be quiet as possible, don’t wanna draw any attention towards yourself or you’ll scare off anythin’ nearby. Same thing can be said about your gun.” Arthur looked over his shoulder at him, “You ever use a bow before, boah?”

Austin shook his head, “Only a couple times when I was young. We got one up by the cabin stored in the shed. Another thing that belonged to our grandfather, but I never touched the damned thing.”

Arthur huffed, amused at the other man’s stubborn nature. “It’s a useful weapon, kid, it can be used to make quiet kills so you don’t frighten off any wildlife in the near vicinity.”

The young man just let out a grunt, “I ain’t touchin’ that thing.”

Arthur just shrugged at the boy’s pride, “Up to you, but I highly suggest you start learnin’ how to use it.”

Over the next several minutes, they examined the grounds, both of them crawling quietly through the tall grass.

“Arthur?”

Austin’s whispered voice reached Arthur’s ear, and he turned to see him waving his arm, gesturing for him to come over. He made his way over, and once he was beside Austin the kid pointed at a few small hoof prints in the soil. He smiled, “Good job there, feller, now see if you can follow them.”

The boy nodded and did just that. Over the next half hour, Arthur continued to help him by pointing out other signs, such as crushed grass, a couple broken branches, and bits of fur here and there. The last sign was several strange marks on one of the trees twenty yards away. ‘Tree rubs,’ of course.

“This way,” Arthur whispered, leading them quietly through a few tall bushes.

Finally they reached a new wide-open clearing. This one had a small pond directly in the center, and in the distance, Arthur spotted the white-tailed buck grazing on some of the lush green grass at its feet.

For a moment, Arthur froze, recalling all the dreams he’d been having. The buck looked so similar to the one in his dreams; the size, the coat, the large antlers it displayed. Every single detail was precise.

Austin sat beside him, and Arthur felt rather than heard the boy lifting his gun.

At that moment, a doe and two young fawns appeared from behind one of the large boulders, the three of them approaching the large buck.

Arthur grabbed the barrel of the gun before Austin could aim the thing.

He watched as the doe came over to the buck with the two young close behind her, and the creatures nuzzled each other lovingly.

It was a sight that Arthur found himself lost in, and he couldn’t help but think of his own family, what was, what could have been, what might have been … If he’d only chosen a different life for himself …

What the hell was wrong with him?

“What the hell are you doin’, Arthur?”

Austin’s voice echoed his thoughts, snapping him back out from his mind. Arthur cleared his throat, “Let’s leave ’em be, kid.” He was going to leave it at that, but then he added “We promised Y/N, remember? Just trackin’.”

Austin gave him a strange look, but after a couple of moments he seemed to decide not to argue with him. “So what now?”

Arthur gazed at the family of deer a few seconds longer, then he flicked his gaze over to Austin, “I don’t know. I reckon we should head on back,” he turned to face the younger man, “You suppose your ready to travel back?”

Again with that strange look, what the hell was Austin seeing? Had Arthur suddenly grown his own pair of antlers? What was running through that boy’s mind?

Finally, he answered, “I guess so, I think I learned plenty today.” They both stood quietly and started heading back towards the wagon. Austin tucked the gun strap over his shoulder, reaching up to scratch at his cheek again. “I’ll admit that was actually quite fun. Thanks, Arthur. You’re a pretty great tracker, in all honesty.”

The compliment felt strange, Arthur thought, especially coming from Austin of all people, but he supposed he would take it. The boy was grateful, having learned something that would be incredibly useful for him and his sister when it came to their survival. “It ain’t no cake walk after this, boah. We still got a long way to go, trackin’ requires a lot of patience — an eagle's eye.”

Austin nodded, giving him a small smile, “I suppose that makes sense. A lot of patience — kinda like fishin’?”

Arthur let out a genuine laugh at that, “I guess you’re right.”

  
2 Weeks Later ...

Birds tittered high up in the trees, singing there own unique songs as the sun’s rays bore down on your back. The weather was absolutely gorgeous today, you thought to yourself as you knelt in your garden. You were in a cheery mood, humming softly as you pruned several of the herbs and flowers. You looked over your shoulder to see that Arthur was still relaxing on the porch swing, working on something in his journal. Writing or drawing? You had no clue, but you were going to leave him to his privacy.

The last two weeks had been quite the ride.

Arthur’s body was improving, his skin and muscles filling back out with each passing week. Even though his blood still showed signs of leftover Tuberculosis bacteria, it was clear his body was slowly but successfully fighting it off. You continued to give him treatments every other day, and he still took daily doses of honey per your instructions.

But despite the fact his body was getting better physically, you knew the herbs and medication still had a large impact on both his physical and mental state, so you still urged him to be cautious with his actions so that he didn’t overwork himself too much. It was crucial for him to stay in a calm state so his mind and body wouldn’t somehow become unstable.

He’d been sleeping a lot better. Every night you woke up to check on him, and Arthur was sleeping peacefully every time. Truly, it made you happy to see him so relaxed now. Ever since you’d sung that lullaby for him so many nights ago, that nightmare of his hadn’t seemed to come back. Though you still wondered who this John was, no matter how much it bothered you, you didn’t want to risk bringing anymore pain to Arthur.

For the past several days Arthur had been on his feet helping out around the cabin, whether it was doing chores or hunting with Austin, he managed to keep himself busy throughout the day. He was regaining the muscle and healthy tone he’d no doubt once had before, his face, eyes, and cheeks becoming full once more, and he was beginning to gain a tan from being out in the sun so much now.

Ever since you had given it to him, not once had Arthur ever taken off his new hat. Unless he was asleep or bathing, the thing rarely ever left his head.

It really did look good on him.

You had to admit, the man was absolutely stunning. Whenever he worked or did any kind of physical labor, you couldn’t help but watch those muscles in his body sometimes, how they moved and flexed beneath his skin, noting the healthy shine of sweat on his face, his neck, his forearms, and God help you, but sometimes he went shirtless when he worked, and it was all you could do not to throw yourself at the man. Push him to the ground and take him there and then —

What on earth was wrong with you? You shook your head hard, trying to perish those dirty thoughts from your mind. You weren’t exactly a plucked flower, but you’d read enough romance novels to give yourself plenty of naughty imagination.

Letting out a sigh, you plucked another dead leaf. There were so many scars across his body, old and new, but one stuck out to you the most. You recalled the scar you’d seen on Arthur’s chest, just above his left pectoral. There was no doubt it was a gunshot wound, the scar tissue around it having sunken down into the ruined flesh. It had long since healed, but the skin there was still pink, still soft, so it hadn’t been too long since it was inflicted on him. Again you wondered, what had happened to him? Who’d shot him? Why? The thoughts of possibility raced through your head, but going off his nature and what you’d seen of him thus far, you couldn’t come to a conclusion or even imagine why anyone would want to hurt that man.

Reaching out to crush another dead leaf, you smiled to yourself.

Arthur was strong ... indeed he was a fighter.

You’d slowly been getting more and more comfortable with the thought of Arthur going out with Austin on his hunting trips, allowing them to start traveling out as far as they needed to go. Food was getting low, and finally you’d told the two boys that they could start hunting for game if they wished. You were proud of them both, for keeping to their word and staying safe.

You could tell your brother was improving with his skills thanks to Arthur, just last week they had managed to bring back a boar, and Arthur had told you that your brother had managed to track it down on his own, but Austin had admitted that he’d missed the first few shots, and Arthur had to kill the boar himself. The two had slowly been getting along, you’d noticed. It was more than refreshing to see.

Arthur had been helping Austin out with his aim several times over the last two weeks, the two of them practicing down by the stream in the late evenings.

You would stay back and watch to observe every chance you got. Honestly, you secretly wished it was you Arthur was teaching. To show you how to handle a gun, how to aim it, how to shoot. You had no idea how to use a weapon, so you picked up whatever you could from the two of them.

Your brother had recently started working with your grandfather’s bow, which confused you at first, since he’d always insisted on using his own carbine repeater. But then he’d explained to you that Arthur had told him it was a stealthy hunting tactic in order to capture more game.

Finally, you’d understood. Winter was slowly approaching, and it was more than important to learn how to use a much quieter weapon, especially when wildlife was so much more scarce during the cold parts of the year.

But — despite countless hours of practice — Austin hadn’t managed to get the hang of it, which worried you somewhat. Poor man, each time he tried aiming an arrow, the thing would wobble in his grip and the shot itself ended up with the arrow landing on the ground only a few feet away. No matter how Arthur instructed him, it seemed hopeless. At one point Austin had nearly thrown the thing into the stream, shouting something about how the bow wasn’t working properly. But Arthur had tested the thing for himself, and of course it worked flawlessly when he’d used it, the arrow finding its mark perfectly on one of the trees he’d been aiming for..

You’d found yourself strangely drawn to the weapon, you had to admit, though you weren’t quite sure why.

The bow itself was very beautiful. The long round limbs were made of dark maple wood, painted with some kind of glossy coating to protect the wood from wear and tear. The handle was wrapped in finely engraved black leather strips. There were several more curly engravings that ran along the weapon itself, and two small metal owl heads were placed at each end, the beaks holding the tight silver bowstring.

A part of you really wanted to try it out for yourself at some point.

The two men were planning on going on another hunting trip today, so it was going to be another quiet evening alone at the cabin for you. Strangely enough, even though you finally felt comfortable with them both being gone, you still weren’t quite used to it.

“How you doin’ there, Y/N?”

Arthur’s deep voice nearly had you jumping out of your skin. You leapt to your feet and turned around to face him. “Arthur!” Your voice cracked, and you cleared your throat, “I didn’t hear you comin’ over.”

Grinning, he let out a soft chuckle, “Sorry bout that, honey, I didn’t mean to scare you.”

“You’re fine,” you said, waving off his apology.

He looked over your shoulder at the plants behind you, “So what’re you doin’?”

You turned to look down at the herbs you’d been working on, “Oh, well I was just pruning some of the plants.” At his questioning look you added, “Sometimes some of the leaves or stems die and I need to take them off, otherwise it could cause disease and the nutrients inside the plants are wasted trying to feed what’s no longer alive. When I get rid of the dead pieces it allows them to focus on keeping the rest of the plant strong and healthy.”

Arthur nodded, though you had the feeling he was only pretending to understand what you were talking about in order to make you feel better, going by the confused look and his face; his eyes narrowed, his mouth her in a small grimace. “So these herbs,” he cleared his throat, “them what you used to treat my TB with?”

His curiosity nearly had you taken aback. Honestly, you hadn’t really expected him to care enough to ask such a question. “Yes,” you said, your voice soft as you looked up at him, “I — I gather pieces from them from time to time and make several elixirs and medications from their properties.” You pointed to one of the plants, “That right there is Ginger, it’s used as an antioxidant, which can help take care of some of the negative effects caused by most bacterias.” You pointed to several others, giving the names and explaining what each of them did.

By the time you’d named a few more, you looked back at Arthur, and his brows were drawn down tight, his hand rubbing at the side of his temple as if he’d gotten a headache. You nearly laughed, “I’m sorry, Arthur, I tend to get carried away sometimes.”

Arthur lifted a brow as if he were actually amused, “I can tell you really enjoy your work,” he said, a wide grin stretching those lips of his, “It’s really amazin’. You should be proud, honey.”

You lowered your eyes, feeling a blush creep into your cheeks, “Thank you, Arthur. I honestly wouldn’t know as much as I did without my mother’s journal. She taught me so much.” You voice nearly hitched, and you blinked several times in order to keep any tears from welling.

Arthur reached out and laid a warm hand on your shoulder in an effort to comfort you, “I’m sure she’d be real proud of you, Y/N.”

You couldn’t speak, so you just nodded in answer.

Several moments passed, and Arthur spoke again, “Austin mentioned to me that you ran into a man named William?”

Your head jerked up that that, surprised. “He told you about that?”

Arthur nodded, “The night you saved me from that mountain, told me you met an herbalist the same day. Quite a character.”

Your brows lifted, “You know him?”

“Yeah. Met him a few times, a long while ago, before — Well, before all that shit went down.”

“Language, Arthur!”

You both laughed, and he tipped his hat to you.

He was truly adorable, you thought as you smiled at him. You lifted your gaze to look at the hat. “So, how you liking your new hat, Arthur?”

Your question had him letting out a laugh as he ran his fingers across the leather brim. “Keep’s the sun outta my eyes, like you said,” he teased. His eyes softened then, those beautiful sapphire-emeralds seeming to stare directly into your soul. “Thank you, Y/N.”

His grateful smile alone nearly overwhelmed you, and you quickly spoke your next words before you found your idiot-self getting lost in his gaze. “I’m glad you like it. My grandmother made that hat for our grandfather when they were both young. It was … meant to stand for something … but he didn’t do it justice with the life he led. It needs to be worn by a good man. Someone like you.”

Arthur’s expression seemed to change at that moment, and you couldn’t help but notice the softness in his eyes suddenly grow hard.

•••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••

A good man.

It was all Arthur could do not to lose himself then and there. To take the hat off and give it back to her immediately, to leave and never turn back even once. Dammit, he didn’t deserve to be here. He didn’t deserve the treatments he’d been given, all the hospitality, the food and shelter that Y/N and Austin had so generously given.

He wasn’t a good man, and he damn well knew it.

It was the second time she’d called him that, and he nearly had to bite his tongue. But what could he possibly say to her at that moment? That he wasn’t the man she truly thought he was? That he’d been a liar? A thief? A ruthless killer?

An outlaw …

Arthur did his best not to squeeze his eyes shut from the sudden pain that welled in his chest. What the hell was wrong with him? There was nothing he could say or do to get past the ache in his heart from those words.

For once, he was extremely grateful to hear that sill boy’s scratchy voice calling out to both of them.

Y/N smiled, looking over Arthur’s shoulder, “Austin, how are ya?”

Austin came jogging over, his face and clothes covered in dust and dirt from whatever work he’d been doing earlier. He stopped a few feet in front of them, “I’m doin’ just fine, sis,” he panted, nodding at Y/N and meeting Arthur’s gaze. “Hey, Arthur, so you ready for our next huntin’ trip?” The young man asked him, a naive yet excited smile spread across his face. Over the past two weeks he’d learned to enjoy the trips, getting to learn something new from them each and every time.

Arthur shrugged with a small chuckle, “That depends, are you?” He nodded at the dirt covering the boy.

Austin scratched his cheek, “Yeah, sorry about that, sir.” He brushed off the dirt from his clothes, “It ain’t nothin’, Just noticed the two of you over here and I wanted to see if you were prepared to head out.”

Over the last several days, Austin had grown the strange and somewhat annoying habit of calling him sir, and Arthur didn’t really know why. Was he trying to show some sort of respect toward him? Maybe after acting like such a dumbass over the past month, he might’ve thought addressing Arthur in that way would gain him redemption? It felt odd, and Arthur really wished he wouldn’t call him that, but he’d go along with it if it made the younger man feel better.

“Well, Austin,” Arthur said, clearing his throat, “Ready when you are, then.”

“Dandy! I found an interestin’ new spot I think we should go check out a ways up north, the wagon’s already loaded up and ready to go.” Austin stated, pointing over toward the stables where the coach stood, with Lily already attached to it. The boy was quick, Arthur thought. He must’ve been busy getting everything prepared while he and Y/N had been working on their own tasks.

Arthur lowered his eyes. On one hand he didn’t want to leave Y/N so abruptly, but on the other he needed to escape the tension that had suddenly risen in his gut from her words. A good man … how could he follow up that line with any further conversation? It hadn’t angered him, but he was tired of hearing it — from anyone. He gave a single nod, “Let’s head out, then.”

As Austin nodded and headed off toward the wagon, Arthur looked back over his shoulder to meet Y/N’s gaze, “We’ll be back soon, honey.” He said softly, winking and giving her a small grin. He hoped she wasn’t disappointed, but he needed to get out of there. Clear his head.

But she didn’t look upset. No, instead her eyes absolutely glowed as she gave him another one of her beautiful smiles. “Y’all stay safe, Arthur.” After a slight moment of hesitation, she returned his wink, “You keep Austin safe now.”

Her teasing helped the tension ease away somewhat, and he let out a chuckle, “Don’t you worry, I’ll keep him in line.”

With that, he headed over to join Austin on the wagon.

••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••

“So where we headed?” Arthur asked as Austin steered Lily up the narrow trail through the tall sequoia trees. He and the younger man waved farewell to Y/N with her returning the gesture as they disappeared around a large rock.

Austin lowered his hand, pulling out a piece of paper from his pocket. He unfolded it and handed it to Arthur, “There’s this new place I wanna check out, passed by it a few days ago while ridin’ Butch. Seemed interestin’.”

Arthur took the map and held it up, looking over a simple drawing of directions. They appeared to lead up north towards the larger mountains, further into the forest.

The kid pointed at a thick scribble he’d made on the paper, “That area right there, it’s right at the foot of the mountains between the trees. A small area of tall grass. I saw a family of elk there a couple times. If we can spot them again, I’m sure we can bring back enough food to last us for a month.”

What he said was true, one elk could last them quite a while. If they managed to kill one, they’d be set for weeks. Arthur folded the map back up and handed it back, “You seem to know what you’re doin’,” He said with a light laugh.

Austin shook his head, “Only a little, sir, it’s why I thought it best for you to come along on this one.”

Arthur shrugged, “You’ll get the hang of it soon enough, kid,” He reached out and patted the man’s shoulder. “I’ll look after ya.”

The younger man narrowed his eyes, “I don’t need no hand-holdin’, Arthur.”

Arthur’s heart suddenly skipped at those words, his smile dropping from his face as his eyes grew flat.

Those words … when had he last heard those exact words —

A memory flashed through his mind … Lenny …

He flinched, lowering his head as he reached up to tug down the brim of his hat, hiding his expression from the brother. The pain was almost unbearable … coming back to bit him in the ass once more.

The loss of his friends, of his family — it had only been a couple months, and the agony still felt just as sharp, as though it had only been yesterday when his life had completely fallen apart.

… What life, though?

Arthur nearly wanted to laugh at himself from the thought.

His family had meant everything to him, the bond they’d shared more real than anything else in the world.

But Arthur would be lying to himself if he’d thought what they had was any kind of real life. He’d spent the majority of his chasing a dream for a life he weren’t even sure about, along with the rest of the gang who’d followed over the years. He’d failed all of them. Hosea, Lenny, Kieran, Sean, Grimshaw, Mac, Davey, Jenny … they’d all had their own lives snatched away from them so abruptly.

They’d never had the chance for the life they’d so desperately fought for.

And the others … Charles, Sadie, Tilly, Mary-Beth, Uncle … Karen, Swanson, Trelawny … Where were they now?

The wonder of their whereabouts prodded his mind like a hot poker every single day. Even though he tried so hard to move on in hopes that they would do the same and lead normal lives, it was extremely difficult to do so. He only hoped they were all safe. They all deserved so much more after all the shit they went through in the gang.

And Jack, Abigail, John …

Arthur lifted his eyes to stare up at the sky, the sun’s bright rays peeking through the small clouds.

‘You’re my brother.’

Those words echoed through his mind, and he allowed himself a sad smile. He thought back to Sister Calderon, the words she’d spoken echoing in his head. ‘Take a gamble that love exists.’

Arthur wasn’t the religious type, but deep inside his heart he prayed for the sake of John and his family, for their safety, so that they may go on to live the lives they’d damn well earned.

John Marston. The boy was a goddamn fool, but he loved Abigail and Jack, and Arthur knew he’d do anything to protect them.  
They were safe.

He knew, deep down in his heart something told him. They were out there.

Time passed by quickly, and finally the wagon stopped. Arthur felt the seat lift as Austin hopped out, and he shook himself out of his thoughts, realizing that they’d arrived at the foot of the mountains. Arthur looked around, taking in the small grassy clearing. He raised a hand to lift the brim of his hat, looking up at the base of the mountain, a tall cliff that encircled half of the area. The other half was enclosed by the thick forest of trees that towered over them, their green and multi-colored coming-autumn leaves providing cool shade to the tiny meadow.

“We’re finally here,” Austin said cheerfully as he rolled his shoulders, stretching out the stiffness in his limbs. He walked behind the wagon to grab his carbine repeater.

Arthur examined the area closely. Indeed, it was a great area for wildlife of all kinds. Plenty of grass, soft ground, perfect temperature, and shelter. He narrowed his eyes, noting a small cave opening at the base of the cliff. It was too small for a bear or cougar, so it was probably just a family of deer, he thought. Still, they had to be cautious. It was an unexplored area. He looked over his shoulder as Austin approached him from behind and stared at the gun he held, “You need to get a handle on that bow soon, kid.” He said teasingly.

“I know, I know, and I ain’t a kid!” Austin snapped, “I’ve been tryin’ but I’m just hopeless with the damn thing!”

Arthur nearly laughed at the blush that crept into Austin’s cheeks as he looked away, unable to meet Arthur’s gaze.

He really had been trying his best, Arthur did notice, but the bow was turning out to be the boy’s natural enemy. Either he weren’t a good teacher, or the bow was truly hopeless for him. Where was Charles when he needed him, Arthur thought almost sadly.

Arthur shook his head at the thought, then threw his hand up in the general direction. “Lead the way.”

Austin gave a small but nervous nod, stepping forward and leading them both across the grass towards the cliff. They crept slowly and quietly, staying low to the tall grass to avoid being spotted by any of the nearby wildlife. There were small sounds here and there as Austin examined the grounds, but they were mostly from squirrels or small rabbits. Since Austin only had the gun with him, they weren’t going to risk scaring off any larger game by shooting and possibly missing smaller targets. Arthur had taught him to be careful with such things.

Gradually they got further and further away from the wagon, and Austin led Arthur towards the foot of the cliff. “There,” the younger man whispered, pointing toward some hoof-prints that had been left behind in the ground. They created a trail, and the two men followed it, making their way around the cliff. Finally, the tracks stopped at the base of some large rocks that formed a small ramp towards the top of the cliff. Austin began to climb, and Arthur followed behind him, as quiet as they could possibly be.

Suddenly a small rock bounced down from atop the cliff, landing in the small meadow below, and Arthur looked up, spotting a small glimpse of large antlers just over the peak. “There’s one,” Austin whispered next to him, having seen them as well.

“Alright, get your gun ready,” Arthur whispered back as they approached the top. His heart was racing, but he forced himself to calm down as they reached the top of the plateau. The elevated area was covered in thick foliage, and the two men hid behind the thick shrubbery as they made their way over to a large rock that provided solid cover.

Austin slowly and quietly cocked the gun, peering over at the large creature nibbling on some of the grass by the cliff-edge. It was a huge bull elk, appearing to weigh at least seven hundred and twenty-five pounds. The creature was definitely large, larger than any Arthur had seen in a long while. The creature was magnificent, he thought. The meat on its bones could definitely keep them fed for weeks.

He looked over at Austin, noticing that the boy was breathing hard, creating too much noise. “Calm yourself,” Arthur muttered, “Elk can hear very well, take a deep breath and let it out slow.”

Austin did as he was told, closing his eyes as he did so. “Alright,” he whispered, then he slowly began scooting forward. He crouched carefully, propping the barrel of the gun on the tip of the boulder.

A small loose rock was knocked off as the weapon was adjusted, landing with a small crack on the hard ground. The elk snatched its head up, its ears perked in their direction. It looked over toward their spot, and before Arthur could stop what happened next, Austin quickly stood from behind cover and fired the repeater.

It was so quick, the kid having not given himself the proper aiming stance, and the recoil shot him backwards, the bullet missing the elk as it pinged off the one of the rocks several feet away. The creature jumped, bounding off quickly in the opposite direction. Austin lifted his gun and fired a few more rounds as it fled down the cliff.

“What the hell are you doin’?!” Arthur grabbed the man’s firing arm as the elk disappeared into the forest below, Lily whinnying and rearing in the wagon as the creature sped by her.

The boy grunted from the small pain of his fall, “I’m sorry, sir,” he grimaced as he stood slowly, “I thought — I thought it heard us, I wanted to try and get it before it ran away —”

“Of course it heard us, you goddamn fool!” Arthur snapped, anger boiling in his blood. “But it didn’t see us! Now the whole damn forest knows we’re here.”

Austin lowered his head, no doubt feeling ashamed from his actions.

“All you had to do was stay still,” Arthur growled, snatching the firearm from Austin’s grip. “Start headin’ down to the wagon. Ain’t no hope of gettin’ anything out here now.”

The boy didn’t say anything, only giving a small nod as he turned away and headed towards the rocks. It was more than clear the man knew he’d made a mistake, and Arthur was more than upset with him. The next few moments were quiet as they started making their way down the way they’d came.

As soon as they reached the meadow, Arthur halted in his tracks, placing a hand to Austin’s chest to stop him, “Hold on.”

Austin looked at him questioningly, “What is it, sir?”

Arthur didn’t answer as he skimmed his gaze over the tall grass. Something wasn’t right. It was way too damn quiet ...

Just then, a massive wolf lunged out of the shrubs from behind, jumping up and catching Arthur on his left shoulder, its sharp teeth sinking deep as its claws caught his flesh.

“Arthur!” Austin yelled.

Arthur shouted in pain as the force knocked him forward, his hat falling away as the heavy weight of the wolf bore down on his body. The gun was knocked out of his hands, and he hit the ground hard. His heart began to beat fast as sharp snarling noises pierced his ears, sharp claws digging deep into his shoulders, Arthur cried out as his flesh was torn open, and he began to struggle, trying his best to flip onto his back. He wasn’t going out without a fight.

The massive gray wolf was unbelievably strong, but Arthur managed to grip the wolf’s head, crushing its skull between his hands as hard as he could until the wolf let go, jumping off his body momentarily. He looked over to see the gun lying on the ground just a couple feet away.

Arthur flipped himself over just before the beast made another attempt and leapt back onto him, its teeth bared for another bite as it aimed for his throat. But Arthur barely managed to block its target by taking hold of the wolf’s neck with a single hand, using the other to try and reach for the gun. Blood was seeping from his neck and shoulders, and his heartbeat began rushing throughout his entire body as the sharp teeth gnashed and snapped just inches away from his face, getting closer as his strength grew weaker.

He let out a loud guttural sound and gathered all the strength he had left, finally managing to grip the gun and swing it through the air, using the butt of the handle to knock the large beast off of him. He staggered to his feet, aiming quickly as he fired the weapon, hitting the wolf square in the chest just as it rushed towards him again. With a loud whine the thing fell to the ground dead, and Arthur’s head whipped around as he heard more growling.

Two more wolves had crept out of the bushes and had cornered Austin near the cliff. The kid looked absolutely terrified as the beasts stalked toward him, his body having frozen entirely.

“Austin!” Damn him if he was going to let another person die on his watch.

Arthur’s gaze began to spin as he aimed at the wolves. He cocked the weapon, but he was seeing damn near triple of everything around him. He was losing blood fast, and he nearly collapsed as he began to feel light-headed. With no other choice, he let out a hard huff, and with everything he had left he lurched across the grass and lunged forward, pushing Austin aside just in time right before one of the the wolves ran towards them.

The heavy creature tackled Arthur’s body hard, causing him to collapse again as the weapon was knocked out of his hands once more. The butt of the cocked gun hit the ground and went off, a sharp whine echoing through the trees as the stray bullet miraculously hit the other wolf. It ran off, leaving a heavy trail of blood in its wake.

As the last wolf held Arthur to the ground, he thought this was going to be it. He had nothing left, he felt absolutely nothing, his mind having completely turned off as his own blood seeped out onto the ground beneath him, his weak limbs refusing to move as his vision began to dim.

Suddenly, another gunshot went off, and he felt a heavy weight fall onto his body. It was soon pushed off, but he found himself unable to care as his heartbeat started drumming between his ears.

Arthur looked up at the sky, his breathing barely audible as he struggled to take in any air. Everything had happened so damn fast ... He could hear someone calling out his name. A man’s voice, but who? A blurry figure appeared over him as a dark red haze began to creep in around his vision, or was that just his imagination? Something hard pressed into his shoulder, and the pain shot through him like a lightning bolt.

Flashes began going through his mind, each one followed by his slowing heartbeats.

Two crosses, placed side by side …

… A large buck, lifting its head as it gazed off into the distance …

… The sun, setting just over the horizon.

Arthur thought of watching the sunrise … the last time he’d had this ethereal feeling … back wherever he’d been. A sunrise, now a sunset …

He felt his body getting lifted … was he finally leaving?

Just before he closed his eyes, a long howl echoed through his head.  
  
— To Be Continued

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Again, please leave a comment of your thoughts! I genuinely enjoy your feedback, and you guys are what keep this story going. Thank you so much for reading!  
> If you want more content on this story such as images, updates, early access, or just lots of Red Dead content, follow @the-mill-kat on Tumblr, hope to see y'all there! =^_^=


	11. Chapter 11

The sun was just beginning to settle down over the peak of the mountains in the West, the sky turning into a red glow, the clouds reflecting off the fading light with beautiful shades of orange and purple.

You sat by the fallen log next to the wide stream, listening to the gentle sounds of the rippling waters. The air was still, the cool temperatures nipping at your skin. After completing several chores around the cabin throughout the evening, you had prepared dinner ahead of time for when the two men came back, knowing they would no doubt be hungry after such a long trip.

It felt like it had been an eternity since Austin and Arthur had departed on their trip, so you wondered how much farther they had actually travelled this time.

A part of you was starting to get worried. Even though you wanted to believe that they were both safe, something inside you didn’t feel quite right, but you couldn’t quite explain why.

Reaching down by your feet, you combed your fingers through the soft grass, picking up some of the smooth multicolored pebbles that had washed up from the stream. One brown, a few grays, one white, you held them up in your palm, flipping them over to study their unique patterns. Nature’s designs were always so fascinating to you, every single leaf, rock, plant, tree … there was always something new to see if you looked close enough.

You let out a sigh, lifting your eyes back up to see the last rays of light peeking over the mountains. Crickets were starting to chirp, the wind picking up slightly, carrying the familiar scent of the approaching night.

Standing to your feet with a sigh, you dropped the pebbles to the ground and began to make your way back to the cabin before it got too cold.

Just as you reached the porch steps, the distant sound of hoofbeats reached your ears, quickly drawing closer. Jerking your head around, you saw Austin driving the wagon towards the house. At first you wondered why your brother was driving so fast, and then you noticed — the seat next to him was empty.

Your heart felt as though it had suddenly dropped to your stomach, and dark dread overcame your entire body as instinct completely took over, your mind completely overcome with worry. Forgetting everything else, you rushed over to the wagon as Austin pulled it up by the side of the cabin and climbed out. He didn’t appear to be harmed, but where was — “Where’s Arthur?” You asked frantically as you approached, “What happened? Why isn’t he — ”

You immediately stopped in your tracks as Austin went around and pulled a limp body from the back of the wagon, covered in blood.

Arthur.

Tears pierced the backs of your eyes as you saw the deep bleeding wounds all over his upper body, grief and terror washing over you. Was he dead … ?

“Austin — ” The fear was almost too much to bear, and you nearly choked, feeling the urge to fall to your knees as you ran up to his side. “What happened? Arthur — is he —”

Austin let out a frustrated huff as he pulled Arthur out from the back of the wagon, only saying two words. “Wolf attack.”

Your hand shot to your mouth as you let out a choked gasp, feeling the overwhelming urge to collapse to the ground. This was all your fault, you thought despairingly. You should have never let them —

Your thoughts were suddenly interrupted as Austin gathered the larger man in his arms, grunting from the weight as he quickly made his way to the cabin. Wait, was he—? Going after your brother, you followed by his side and studied Arthur’s face, watching and listening closely for any signs of life until you heard it — a deep groan, and then his eyelids fluttered slightly.

Oh, dear God, he was still alive!

Instantly, you felt yourself change, your mind immediately rerouting itself onto a completely different set of tracks. Your heart racing, you ran ahead and held the door open for both of them as they walked through. There was no time to waste, not a single damn second.

When Austin headed over to the large couch with Arthur in his arms, you spoke up firmly, “Wait,” At your brother’s questioning look, you lifted your hand to point towards the small hallway, “Take him to my room.”

Austin scowled, his disapproval clearly showing, but he didn’t argue with you. He turned around and carried Arthur towards your bedroom as you went into your office and gathered all the supplies you could possibly need.

Grabbing the large metal tray from your desk, you piled everything onto it quickly. As you stocked up and grabbed a few spare towels, you couldn’t help but notice how low you were starting to run on medical supplies … there was clearly not going to be enough for what Arthur needed to cover after the next few days …

You cursed to yourself at the fact, but you couldn’t worry about that now.

Making your way down the hall, you burst into your bedroom and set the tray down on the dresser next to the bed. Austin stood over in the corner still holding Arthur as you snatched the sheets off the mattress, covering the bare cot with the soft thick towels as quickly as you could. Doing this was going to make it much easier to change back into fresh linens once the bleeding had stopped, allowing Arthur to be more comfortable once his treatment was done.

You nodded at Austin, “Set him down,” you commanded softly, and he did as you asked without saying a word, laying Arthur down on his back on the center of the mattress.

Your eyes ran over him as your brother stepped back, taking in what appeared to be several large claw marks all over his shoulders and chest, along with a few more of them on his lower left leg. You looked up to the blood-soaked cloth that was covering his neck, where most of the blood seemed to be coming from.

You were almost afraid to see what was underneath.

There were so many questions racing through your head, so many emotions flooding throughout your entire body. Fear, despair, fury, guilt … You so desperately wanted answers, but stopping the bleeding was your top priority right now.

You lifted your gaze back up to your brother, “I need soap and water. Now.”

He gave a single nod, leaving the room as you leaned over Arthur to inspect the wounds. You swallowed hard as you saw all the blood, both dry and fresh, feeling a growing lump in your throat. Was that your heart trying to escape? Your vision became blurry, and suddenly you felt something wet running down your cheeks.

Lifting a hand, you quickly wiped the tears away. You couldn’t allow your feelings to take over, you needed to focus on the task at hand.

Grabbing a dry cloth from the large tray, you immediately went to work on cleaning the wounds, dabbing as gently as you could at the raw injuries. There would need to be stitches, you noted, as you saw how deep the awful gashes truly were.

After that was done, you eyed the bloodied fabric over his neck. With some hesitation, you reached out and gently grabbed the hem of the cloth, lifting it up slowly. Holes. Several of them, wide and extremely deep. Your heart nearly stopped at the vicious sight, and you almost wanted to cry again.

Snatching up another thick towel, you held it down to the wound, slowing the blood flow as best you could.

Austin came back into the room with a large bin filled with soapy water, and he set it down by your side without a word. You could feel your brother’s stare as he backed away, but you didn’t bother to look at him. All your attention was on Arthur. Nothing else in the world mattered here and now but him.

“Austin, I need you to hold this to his neck for me,” you said sternly, gesturing to the cloth you were holding, “I need to get to work on closing up his injuries.”

Your brother nodded wordlessly, coming around the other side of the bed to do as you’d asked. As he held down the towel to slow the blood flow, you immediately got to work on cleaning the wounds.

Dipping a small towel into the basin, you soaked the cloth in the suds and wrung it out. Once it was damp, you leaned forward over the edge of the bed and began cleaning the blood away so that you could wash the cuts and see the real damage Arthur had taken.

“I’m so sorry … ” your brother’s soft words pierced the quiet space between you, barely audible to your ears, “It was all my damn fault … the gunshots — I’m such a goddamn fool — ”

You had no idea what he was talking about, but distraction wasn’t an option at the moment, and he went on cursing under his breath.

Once the wounds were finally clean, you used the bottle of alcohol to disinfect the areas, rubbing the liquid into the cuts with another fresh damp cloth.

Arthur’s body jerked at the contact, weak groans coming from his throat. 

Snapping your gaze up, you saw that his face was contorted, his thick brows drawn down tight, his lips pulled back in a pained grimace.

A wave of dread and relief flooded you at the same time. Dread that you were causing him more pain, but enormous relief that he was still with you. You let out a small sigh to settle your nerves and went right back to work.

When the task was complete, you set the bottle aside and picked up the syringe along with a vial of medication that would help him to relax. It was also going to help him through this next process.

Piercing the rubber lid, you drew the liquid into the barrel and reached out to his arm. Finding the thick vein, you pressed the needle in and deposited the contents into his system.

Placing the now empty syringe aside, you picked up the small needle and surgical thread from the tray. Nodding to your brother, he stepped back to give you some room. This wasn’t going to be fun for Arthur, but it had to be done. Leaning down over his neck, you pushed the thin needle into his skin around the bite marks.

Arthur let out a rough grunt, but due to his weak state and the applied medicine, he was unable to struggle much against your hold. Quickly, you pulled the thread through and pierced through the skin again, repeating the process over and over until the worst of the gashes were completely closed up.

Tying the final knot and cutting the string, you stepped back and observed the stitch-work you’d just done. Having only ever done this kind of treatment on animals in the past, it felt so strange to now be doing them on a human. Thankfully, though, it appeared as though you’d done a decent job. The bleeding had stopped significantly, and now all that was left was to patch them up.

With Austin’s help in lifting Arthur’s upper body, you were able to wrap up the wounds on his torso and neck until they were completely covered underneath thick layers of bandages. His leg was thankfully not as bad as the rest of him, so you finished that part of him up with more alcohol and another bandage. Even though the large wound wasn’t too deep, there was no way in hell you were going to allow him back on his feet for the next few days at the very least.

If he made it.

Dear Lord above.

Looking up at Austin, you narrowed your eyes. Now that everything was settled down, the emotions came flooding back. You recalled him saying that it was his fault, and your voice was flat as you glared at your brother, “What the hell happened to him?”

Austin refused to meet your gaze, portraying his guilt even further as he reached up to rub the back of his neck, all the while looking down at his feet, “We was huntin’ an elk. Got close, but I — I got careless. Wolves was drawn to our location, we was ambushed and … ” He squeezed his eyes shut then, and let out a hard sigh, “Arthur saved my life.”

Those words suddenly drained all the anger from you right then and there. The tension in your body left, your mind and body going completely numb as you looked down at the man lying on the bed.

Arthur saved my life.

This man … little more than a stranger … they were nobody to him … yet he had saved Austin from getting mauled by wild animals, nearly getting himself killed in the process …

He’d been willing to give his own life to save her brother’s …

You felt something inside you change in that moment. Though you couldn’t place what it was, something in your heart completely melted for him.

Your vision became blurry, and you felt another tear escape as it ran down your cheek. Reaching up to wipe it away, you knelt down by the side of the bed. Reaching out a gentle hand, you combed your fingers through Arthur’s hair, pushing the stray strands away from his face.

You heard the fading sound of footsteps, but you paid it no mind at that moment in time, lost in your thoughts as you stared down at Arthur’s sleeping form. You smiled down at him, listening to his soft breathing. “What the hell am I ever gonna do with you?” You asked under your breath.

•••••

The magnificent buck lifted its head from where it was grazing, looking off into the distance. The sun was making its way down, the golden rays of the sunset hitting off the top of the tall trees as it disappeared over the peak of the mountains. As it descended, the skies slowly turned from lights and colors of pink and orange, to shades and shadows of blue and purple. The stars began to appear in the dimming sky, the glints of white and blue piercing through one by one as the cool wind swept through the leaves of the trees.

Arthur stood in the middle of the meadow, watching the graceful creature from a distance. For a while it wandered about, inspecting different areas as if it were searching for something. He wondered about its curious behavior, until finally the creature turned, making its way toward the thick forest that lay just beyond the edge of the field. He was pulled along with it, his body nothing but air as he was left to do nothing but spectate.

The woods ahead were dense, darker than the night sky above as it swiftly approached. More stars of many colors began to appear and twinkle overhead, the full moon casting its soft blue glow over the land.

The buck disappeared into the forest, the darkness swallowing it whole as it vanished completely.

At first, Arthur was left alone for a while, until a soft hooting sound came down from the branches. Arthur lifted his head to look up at the tall trees, and spotted a large, great-horned owl perched high above him on one of the thick branches.

Its feathers were magnificent and large, the patterns reminding him of something he couldn’t quite place at that moment. He took a closer look at them, and noticed that the plumes were rather worn, grayed … From far away they seemed so flawless, but up close … Its eyes glowed with the reflection of the moon, and it turned its head to stare directly down at him. He found himself unable to help but feel mesmerized by them, as if they held some sort of otherworldly light.

Something in his chest felt strange as he met the creature’s gaze, and he felt oddly drawn to it. Taking a quiet breath, he tried stepping forward slowly.

The owl suddenly lifted its large wings, taking off into the night towards the mountains. Arthur was pulled with it, following it through the starry sky for a while until it finally landed on another tree, far from where it had taken off.

Arthur took in his new surroundings. Something felt familiar about this place, but he couldn’t understand why. Looking around, he spotted the mountain nearby — and a small cave opening in the side. He could’ve sworn he’d seen it before …

The great-horned creature made a soft coo that echoed around him, and once again it lifted its wings to take flight, its feathers flapping loudly as it lifted itself into the air and swept over Arthur’s head, and then vanished into the dark cave before him.

Arthur stared into the opening of the black void, narrowing his eyes. What the hell was going on? He approached it cautiously, crouching low to the ground as the owl’s calls continued in his head, calling out to him.

However, as he got closer to the entrance, the cooing suddenly turned into a dark and ferocious growling. The low sound reached his ears from the depths of the cave, and suddenly two fierce brown eyes opened from the darkness to stare directly at him.

Arthur came awake with a gasp, his eyes snapping open. He flinched, blinking several times as the morning sun’s rays shined directly on his face through the window. Damn, that hurt.

Another confusing as hell dream again. He groaned inwardly, feeling tired of whatever his mind was struggling to tell him, if it was indeed saying anything.

Which he somewhat doubted.

Where was he? He tried to move, but his body felt like a cloud, warm and numb.

He gathered all his strength and was finally able to lift his head slightly. Looking down, he saw that a thick duvet was laid out over his body — and he noticed the floral pattern instantly. Turning his head into the pillow, he inhaled through his nose, taking in the scent of the soft fabric.

Y/N.

He sighed, his entire body relaxing now that he knew he was back at the cabin … but what — what the hell'd happened? He was still confused as to how he’d gotten here.

Where was Austin? Was the boy alright? Where was Y/N?

Then he heard it, his ears finally picking up the sound of soft snoring coming from the corner of the room. He turned his head — and saw Y/N sitting on a large cushioned armchair next to the dresser, a red quilt covering her sleeping form. Her legs hung over one of the armrests, her arms crossed over her chest as she rested her head on a thick blue pillow.

He wanted to smile at the sight, she looked almost adorable like that, so at ease as if she didn’t have a single care in the world. But if he were honest with himself, she didn’t look all that comfortable. He lost his smile then, feeling guilty for having taken up her bed.

A sharp stabbing pain shot through his shoulder, and Arthur let out a loud involuntary grunt.

Y/N’s eyes opened, and she looked over at him, “You’re awake!” Her voice was filled with relief as she got up from the chair, throwing the quilt to the ground as she rushed over, kneeling by his side and smiling down at him.

“I’m awake,” Arthur repeated as she reached out to him, her hand settling gently on his arm.  
His tongue felt thick, and he doubted he’d be able to form a single coherent sentence, but he would try. “What the hell … happened?”

There.

It took a little extra effort, but with a few extra breaths he could manage it.

Her smile fell, and she looked down as she stroked his arm. “Austin said y’all got attacked by wolves. That — that they’d — ” She brought her other hand up to her face, covering her mouth. She blinked rapidly, as if she were trying to hold back tears. “I’m so sorry, Arthur.”

Her unexpected apology had him taken aback, and he gave her a confused look. “Whaddya need to be sorry for?”

Y/N let out a soft hiccup, tears escaping as they ran down her cheeks. “I should’ve never let you leave the cabin until you were better. I’m such a moron,” she wiped away the tears with the back of her hand, then hid her face in the duvet sobbing, “this is all because of me.”

Arthur was speechless. How in the hell and why did she believe that any of this was her doing?

He wanted so badly to comfort her, so he slowly lifted his hand, bringing the tips of his fingers to her soft cheek.

She jerked at the contact and looked up at him.

“Ain’t nothin’ to be sorry for, honey.” He whispered, giving her a gentle smile.

Y/N sniffed, rubbing a hand across her face once more, “But I am, it was my mistake to let you go so soon while you were still being treated. Now … now it’s goin’ to take even longer for — for your body to — ” She squeezed her eyes shut, speaking weakly through gritted teeth. “I can’t believe you’re back.”

He dropped his hand and looked around the room, “Where’s Austin? He alright?”

She nodded, lowering her eyes to the duvet. “He left yesterday mornin’. Said he was going to pick up some more medical supplies since we’re running low. He won’t be back for a few days.” She fiddled with the fabric, “He told me it was the least he could do — ” She stopped and looked back up at him, her expression softening, “Because … you saved his life.”

Before Arthur could blink, she had both her hands on either side of his face … and she was kissing the hell out of him, her head tilted to the side as she pressed her warm lips firmly against his.

He let out a grunt, and she pulled away instantly, seeming to mistake the sound he made for pain, “I’m so sorry — ”

Before she could move away, however, he gripped her wrist, squeezing it lightly. When she met his eyes in question, he grinned and whispered softly, “You’re alright, girl.”

•••••

Those unexpected deep words sent a shiver down your spine, your body nearly melting into liquid from that deep western drawl as you looked down into that intense blue-green stare. What on earth was it about him that drew you into his eyes like an ocean you could drown in?

Blinking, you looked away and cleared your throat. You needed to change the subject immediately before you lost all train of thought. “So anyway, how’re you feelin’ right now?” You asked softly, gesturing with a small nod at the rest of his body. It was probably a dumb question, but it was the only one you could think of on the spot.

Arthur smirked, “I’ve no idea,” he replied, his western drawl dragging out the words. He lifted his head to look down at himself, then he grunted as he tried to sit up.

“Oh, no, you don’t, mister,” you snapped as you shot a hand out to his chest, stopping him from making the effort. “There’s no way I’m lettin’ you off this bed.”

He narrowed his eyes, his lips pulling back in another grin, “Is that a threat, or an invitation?” His voice was a light tease, his eyes glittering with amusement.

Your eyes widened at his flirting. “How on earth can you think like that when you’re like this?”

He let out a huff, turning his head to look up at the ceiling. “You kissed me first.”

A warm blush crept into your cheeks. It wasn’t a lie, but the words still sent shivers down your spine.

Again, you had to move away from the topic before you pounced on the man. “Is it alright if I examine your wounds?”

He looked over at you again, his eyes studying yours. It took all you had not to break your professional mask underneath his close scrutiny. A moment of silence passed, and he finally nodded, letting out a sigh as he looked back up at the ceiling with a huff, “Fine.”

You gave a small smile as you stepped forward and leaned over him, lifting the thick blanket away from his body. You examined the bandages, looking for any blood that might have made its way through. It had been two days since you’d stitched up his injuries, and most of the patches were still clean. All except for his neck, where a bit of pink was starting to show.

He spoke up, “How long’s it been?”

You looked up at him, “Two days. You were out for a while from the medicine.”

He nodded.

You continued to examine the bandages, moving the blanket further down to look at the one on his leg. After seeing that it was still clean, you replaced the sheet to cover him up from the waist down. “Everything looks alright for now, Arthur. I just need to look at your neck real quick. Are you hungry at all?”

He shook his head in response as you leaned over to begin undoing the coverings around his throat. It was the largest patch you had ever done, the dressing going over his neck and shoulder and around his chest to hold it all in place. As soon as you lifted it off his wound, he hissed as some of the stitches caught on the bandage.

“I’m so sorry,” you whispered softly, bringing your hand over to loosen the tangle. When the bandage was worked free, you took a closer look at the wound.

“How’s it look?” Arthur asked in a humorous tone, as if he were embarrassed by what it might look like to her.

It wasn’t a pleasant sight, but it looked much better than it had two days ago. “Well, you ain’t gonna be doin’ any heavy-liftin’ for a while,” you said lightly.

He narrowed his eyes up at you, then he smiled, “Guess that’s a given.”

You opened the bedside cabinet to pull out some of the medical equipment you had placed there yesterday as emergency supplies. Bandages, a jug of water, fresh rags, a syringe, and many vials of medicine and herbs. You opened the jug and soaked one of the rags in the cool water, then brought it to Arthur’s wound to clean the blood that had seeped out and dried up around the injury.

He flinched at the contact, and you tried being more gentle as you ran the fabric over the tender skin. Once it was clean, you redressed the wound with fresh patches, getting Arthur to sit up just a little so you could wrap the bandage all the way around him several times to secure everything in place.

Finally, he was able to lie back down as you gathered the syringe and one of the vials. “This will help your body to fight off any future infections,” you said to him as you pulled the liquid into the barrel of the syringe, “It may make you a little woozy since it’s a bit strong.”

You looked at him questioningly to get his approval as you held it above his arm. He gave a nod, and hissed as the needle punctured his skin. After a couple seconds you tossed the now empty instrument on the dresser and patched up the small slit left behind. “That should just about do it,” you said cheerfully.

He gave you a small smile of thanks, and that expression alone nearly had you melting as you returned his smile with one of your own. You knelt back down by his side, taking the liberty of running your hand up and down his thick forearm.

A long moment of silence passed, the momentary peace between the two of you almost feeling like a blessing from above.

Then his eyes suddenly widened, “The hat!” He jerked his head up, looking around the room, his eyes scanning the space frantically, “Where is it?”

For a split second you had no clue what he was talking about, and then you remembered, “My grandfather’s hat?”

You were stunned by his concern. The only thing that had been on your mind this whole time had been Arthur. Not once had you ever thought of anything else but his health, not even remembering the hat until now. Now that he’d brought it up, you realized that they hadn’t brought it back after the attack. So it must’ve been lost. “It’s alright, Arthur,” you said quickly to reassure him, “I can go back and get it tomorrow. Right now I just need you to relax for me.”

He froze then, his head turning slowly back to you as he narrowed his eyes. “Ain’t no way in hell I’m … lettin’ you go back there alone.”

You shook your head and patted his shoulder softly, making sure to keep clear from his worst injury. “Don’t you worry about me right now, I’ll just get it back — ”

“No, you’re damn well not — ”

“Arthur, it’s fine, I can — ”

His hand suddenly shot up and grasped your wrist firmly. Your eyes widened at the unexpected strength his hold had as his fingers tightened around your flesh. You met his eyes worriedly, and what you saw in them nearly terrified you.

“You’re not goin’,” he snapped, his drawl sharp. It was all he said, but the words were spoken in such a dire tone that it took you aback.

The look he gave was sinister, his thick brows drawn down tightly as he glared up at you. Gone was the soft man from earlier, the one you were used to ...

Everything about him had gone dark now — it was almost as if he were an entirely different person. The soft shell he’d had from earlier … it was completely gone now, broken away to reveal a much different man underneath.

But something wasn’t right … the frightening manner he was giving off so easily now; it was coming off of him so naturally, too much so … Almost as if he were used to being this way?

So … threatening.

You knew right away that he wasn’t going to take any shit from you, nor no one else.

Surprised, all you could do was nod, and he finally released his grip from your arm, lowering his hand back down to his side.

You let out a breath, lifting your arm up to your chest to rub at your wrist.

He let out a rough breath as he noticed your action, the dark air seeping away from his body. “I’m sorry. I … ” He turned his head to look away, as if he were ashamed, “I just don’t want you gettin’ hurt.”

You said nothing, still surprised from what had just happened. His expression, the sinister vibe he’d just given off, it had left just as quickly as it had arrived.

Who was this man, really?

That look he’d had … you'd never seen it up until now. But it had come to him so naturally somehow. The ice-cold expression, the threatening air around him …

What the hell had he been?

You lowered your gaze to your wrist, rubbing softly at the skin with your other hand. He hadn’t exactly hurt you, but the small burn was still there. “It’s alright, Arthur,” you found yourself saying out loud, “I didn’t … I didn’t mean to worry you at all.”

He turned his head back to you to meet your eyes again, “Did I hurt you?” He asked, his tone gentle once more.

You gave him a reassuring smile as you shook your head, “I’ll be fine.” You gave him a wink in an effort to try and calm him, “You just surprised me, s’all,” you said lightly.

He let out a huff at your attempt at humor, as if he didn’t believe you for a even a second. “I’m real sorry, Y/N ... I didn’t mean to hurt you.” He looked up to meet your gaze again, “And about your hat … it’s my damn fault it got lost,” he let out a sigh, his western drawl sounding genuine as he took in a deep breath.

“Arthur, it’s not your — ”

“First thing I’m gonna do ... when I get out of this bed … I’m gonna go out there and get it back for you.”

“Arthur, please — ”

“My mind’s made up,” he said sharply.

Something inside of you wanted to protest. You wanted to tell him no, but you knew it would be best if you agreed with him, at least for now. If only to help him feel comfortable. In this very moment, you would go along with it, even though inside your mind you were already making plans otherwise. You nodded, smiling as you responded, “Of course, Arthur. But please, I need you to rest right now. Don’t worry about the hat just yet.”

“Promise me you ain’t goin’ out there.” His voice was deep, the gravel in his tone unsettling as he stared up at you.

For a while, you could barely move, unable to even blink under his leer. “I promise, Arthur.” You stroked his arm in an effort to soothe him, “But for now, just let me treat you, alright?”

Arthur said nothing at first, watching you for several more seconds as if he were trying to study your sincerity. Finally, the corners of his mouth lifted in a smile and he let out a soft chuckle, shaking his head slightly. “Seems it ain’t been long enough.”

Shaking your head to clear your thoughts, you lifted a brow at his words, “Since what?”

“We’re already doin’ this again.” He said as the corners of his mouth lifted in a smirk, gesturing with a nod down at himself. He lifted a hand slowly to rub at one of the bandages on his chest.

“Well, you need to stop gettin’ yourself into trouble,” you teased with a few light slaps to his arm, “then we wouldn’t have to keep doin’ this.”

He burst out laughing, and the abrupt movement caused him to groan as he flinched from the pain that shot through his body. “I guess you’re right. I’m a dumbass, ain’t I?” He chuckled softly, “Ain’t no news to me. You wouldn’t be the first … to think that.”

You narrowed your eyes. “You’re not a dumbass, Arthur.” You paused, “Well, maybe a little for gettin’ yourself into trouble like this, but — you saved my brother’s life,” you stated firmly. You continued to stroke up and down his arm, running your hand over his rough skin, feeling the soft hairs underneath your fingers. “He’s alive because of you.” Lowering your head, you had to hold back the emotions that began to flood you again, “I … I can never thank you enough.”

Arthur sighed, his chest falling as he closed his eyes. “You saved my life, Y/N. You think I’m gonna … let you lose somethin’ you love?”

Those words touched your heart, and you reached out to comb your fingers through his hair, brushing the loose brown strands away from his forehead. “Thank you, Arthur … I — truly, thank you for what you did.”

His face went soft as he let out a sigh, “It weren’t nothin’,” he said, his voice sounding tired. That blue-green stare lowered, as if he were lost in thought, “I promise, I’ll get your grandfather’s hat back.” He closed his eyes then and leaned into your hand, as though he were relishing in your touch.

Both of you stayed like that for a while, the seconds turning into minutes as time seemed to stretch on forever.

Eventually, his breathing became even, his chest now rising and falling slowly in a steady rhythm.

He’d fallen asleep, and you stepped back to let him rest. Stepping out of the bedroom, you shut the door quietly behind you and stepped out into the sitting room.

You thought about what he’d said, about going out there again and risking his well-being to return something else you loved. Grandfather’s hat …

But deep down, you knew he’d done enough. He’d risked his own life, knowing he was ill, to save Austin’s. There was no way in hell you were going to let him go back there, not for anything.

Yet you knew in your gut, as long as the hat was still out there, Arthur was most likely going to live up to that dumbass title of his and go back out there to get it, no matter what you said to him. It was only a matter of time.

You closed your eyes as you pondered the thought. After a few deep breaths, you settled on your final decision.

Tomorrow, early in the morning before he woke up, you were going to go out there with Lily and get it back. It was one of the last things you had left of him, and it indeed was something you held close to your heart. Austin had handed you the map the same night after he’d gotten back with Arthur, and you were going to use that to find your way to that exact location. As long as you were cautious and quick, there should be nothing to worry about. Right? You’d get back before Arthur ever woke up, and the hat would be returned.

You eyed your grandfather’s bow, propped up in the corner by the fireplace. You could defend yourself with that, couldn’t you? It shouldn’t be too hard. How difficult could it be to handle a bow and arrow? Maybe — maybe you wouldn’t even need it at all! You’d ride out with Lily, find the hat, and get back within the hour if you were quick.

Sure you might have to bear Arthur’s verbal tantrum when he realized what you’d done, but it was better than the thought of him going back there again. Alone. He’d eventually get over it, wouldn’t he?

That thought suddenly brought another, and you paused, recalling his dark transformation from earlier.

You bit your lip as you pictured it again in your head. The dark air he’d given off. What his face had looked like, the strength in his grip despite his weakened state. He’d been so sinister in that one single moment, threatening, his nature having shifted to something entirely different than what you had ever seen from him before.

Arthur had been a much different man before you’d met him. You were sure of it.

It was only a matter of finding out who.

••••••••••

The owl was back.

Arthur stood in the middle of a meadow again, watching it fly over him, its beating wings nearly silent in the night sky. The stars shined down, the full moon’s glow once again lighting the landscape around him.

The owl let out a sharp screech, and just then it swooped down and picked something up from the tall grass right next to Arthur, taking off again and carrying whatever it was with it over to the nearest branch.

He narrowed his gaze as the creature landed gracefully on its new perch, and looking closely, he noticed that the large winged creature had just caught a filthy rat. It struggled in vain inside the grasp of its sharp claws, but there was no hope for it. Those shiny talons squeezed the life out of the vermin, and it squeaked its last breath.

The owl looked around, its chosen branch just at the edge of a dark forest, its grayed feathers ruffling in the gentle night wind. It turned its head as it scanned its surroundings, hooting and calling out in screeching rings as if it were searching for something, or someone.

Finally, it seemed to notice him as its gaze froze on him. It made a curious coo, lifting its wings to rustle up its feathers. Its eyes were just as mesmerizing, but this time … the color was different. A familiar color … almost like someone's he knew …

Again, Arthur was compelled toward the creature, finding himself taking several slow steps in its direction.

It spread and flapped its wings silently, but stayed right where it was in the tree. Was it trying to encourage him? He moved forward, remaining cautious as the creature watched him approach.

At last, he stopped several feet away, looking up questioningly, and he found himself able to speak, “What do you want from me?”

The owl’s head tilted at his question, as if trying to understand. After a few seconds of its scrutinizing gaze on him, it lifted its leg, the one with the rat in its grasp, and released the rodent, the ball of dirty fur landing at Arthur’s feet.

Arthur looked down at the dead rat, blood seeping from one single area in the center of its chest. He grimaced, unable to understand what the hell was going on. He looked back up at the winged creature and narrowed his eyes. Was this some kind of messed up offering to him? He parted his lips, but he was unable to speak again, his throat having closed up from an unseen force.

Suddenly, he could no longer move, an invisible vice having taken hold of him. At first he struggled, grunting with the useless effort as his limbs refused to obey.

The owl let out another soft coo, and Arthur looked up to see the owl again … but it was gone. He looked back down to see the rat, but it had vanished as well, leaving nothing but an abnormally large puddle of blood behind. Enough to come from a human …

He couldn’t understand any of this, and he began to get aggravated as his face tightened, fighting the unseen hold as the puddle of blood grew larger, the red slowly making its way towards his feet.

A small rustling reached his ears, and he snapped his head up, inspecting the dark void of the dense forest.

At that moment, two blue eyes appeared and stared right at him. His heart skipped a beat, his chest tightening up to the point that he flinched from the pain.

The eyes drew closer, and Arthur could only watch as the shadowed creature revealed itself from the darkness.

The buck.

There was blood leaking from one of its antlers, the thick red trails running around the true bone and down its neck, dripping off its fur to land on the green grass beneath its hooves. It let out a soft breath through its nose as it made its way towards him, stopping just when it was only a few feet away.

Arthur wasn’t sure what to do, and the silence stretched on into eternity as the matching pair of eyes stared directly into his own, the blood continuing to run down its antler, as if it were coming from the bone itself. He observed the creature, and noticed that more blood was seeping from the two sharp tips of one of its hooves …

After several long moments passed, it stepped around and moved past Arthur, walking right by him. He couldn’t help but notice — the fur was much darker. Rather than the normal light brown, it was more like a burnt umber, stained with blood in several areas.

The sight was nearly sinister.

Finally he was able to move again, and he turned around sharply to follow wherever the creature was headed —

Only to see the dark opening of the cave again, appearing out of thin air directly in front of him, and the buck was nowhere to be seen.

… Two brown eyes now stared at him from the cave’s black abyss.

His heart began to beat fast, and a long howl echoed around him from every direction, getting louder and louder. Several scratches began to appear over the right side of the creature’s face as a crackling sound began to ring out, blood trailing down from the fresh wounds as the shadowed beast began to growl. The brown eyes narrowed at him, and sharp teeth bared as it lunged forward —

Arthur jerked awake, his eyes snapping open. He was breathing rapidly, his heart beating fast in his chest as he tried to catch up with his mind and reality.

Finally, he was able to calm himself enough to take in his surroundings. He looked around. The room was empty, the air chilly. From where he sat in the bed, he could make out the soft light in the sky through one of the windows. The sun hadn’t risen yet, so it was just before dawn. Y/N must have slept in her brother’s bed last night —

Something suddenly sounded out from outside, and he jerked his head towards the window again. The abrupt movement had him flinching and raising a hand to rub around the bandages of his neck and shoulder.

Damn, he’d completely forgotten that he was injured.

Another soft bang. Was that coming from the stables?

He grunted as he tried to sit up. Y/N must have given him another dose while he’d been out, every part of him felt like it was being weighed down by an anvil. He groaned as he rubbed at his neck, trying to avoid the urge to touch the actual wound to keep from irritating it. Not to mention it would hurt like a son of a bitch.

Finally, he managed to sit up straight in the bed, using one of his arms for support as he propped himself up on the cot. He squeezed his eyes shut, blinking rapidly to clear his vision. It was a bit hazy, but he was able to manage it.

A loud whinny sounded from the stables.

He groaned from the sound as it pierced his head. Y/N must have been taking care of Lily, he thought. Giving the horse some breakfast or whatever the hell she was doing.

He lifted the blanket away from his legs to see that he was still wearing his pants, but the lower part on one side had been cut away to patch up his lower leg. He frowned, a bit disappointed that his favorite pair of jeans had been ruined. No doubt more of Y/N’s work. But what the hell, if it meant doing what she needed to do, he’d forgive her for it.

Arthur grunted as he slowly moved his legs over the side of the bed, his bare feet touching the cool wooden floor beneath him. The sensation was a shock to his senses, and he came to even quicker. He realized that he felt like shit, and he desperately wanted to get out of this bed so he could step outside for some fresh air. It didn’t matter what her ladyship demanded of him, he only knew he needed to get out of the cabin.

“It ain’t like I’m goin’ anywhere,” he muttered to himself as he looked down at all the patchwork on his body, letting out a groan, “Damn.”

Tightening up the muscles in his legs, he lifted himself from the bed and stood to his feet. “Shit,” he groaned as he nearly lost his balance, but he was able to catch himself on the dresser. It rattled from his sudden weight, and he took a few deep breaths, trying to focus on regaining his stability. At the rate of all the bedrest he’d been getting, it was only a matter of time before he lost more muscle than he’d previously gained back over the last few weeks.

He looked at himself in the large mirror hanging above the dresser, taking in his disheveled appearance and all the damn bandages.

Wolves.

John would have a damn field day if he were here right now. His brother would never let him live it down.

His skin was rough, patchy. His beard was starting to grow back in again, and his hair was absolutely everywhere. His brows drew down as he glared at his reflection. He let out a dark chuckle, shaking his head, “You ugly bastard.”

Another whinny, and Arthur turned his head towards the window. From this angle, he couldn’t see what was going on, but whatever it was, maybe he could help the princess out.

He pulled open one of the drawers and found his old shirt neatly folded on top of some folded bed sheets. He pulled it out and saw that there had been some stitch work done where the wolves had torn right through it. His blood had even been washed out. He narrowed his eyes, almost laughing at the thought of Y/N going through the trouble of doing all of that when he probably would’ve just thrown the thing away.

Looking down again, he saw that his black neckerchief had been placed beneath it, and decided to wear that as well. It would probably be best to cover up the bandages on his neck to help put her mind at ease once she saw him walking around against her request.

Another loud whinny sounded out from the stables.

Dammit, what the hell was that woman doing?

Arthur pulled the shirt around his shoulders, grunting from the effort as he tried to be careful with his wounds. Finally he was able to slip it on and button the fabric over his stomach and chest. He tucked the ends into his jeans, then threw the black neckerchief gently around his throat, tying it up in the usual loose knot he was so used to.

He looked up at the mirror and paused, taking in his appearance once more. He lifted a hand to run his fingers through his hair, trying to make it look presentable. Then leaned in as he inspected his teeth, rubbing at them with the tip of his finger.

Arthur froze suddenly. What the hell was he doing?

He shook his head with a sharp huff and pulled back from the mirror. Turning away, he hissed as pain shot through his lower left leg, but he pushed through it, limping slightly over to the doorway. His boots had been left generously by the bedroom door, and he pushed his feet into them, being careful with his injured left leg.

Opening the door, he slipped out into the hallway and made his way to the sitting room. He couldn’t smell any food, so nothing had been cooked yet.

Strange. He knew Y/N usually had a bite to eat before she went to work on whatever chores she had planned for the day. He made his way over to the front door and stepped outside. The early dawn’s cool breeze woke his nerves up even further, and he paused to take a deep breath, taking in the glorious feeling he’d been so used to from all those years of living outdoors.

Truly, he was not an indoor kind of man.

The soft sound of hooves reached his ears, and he looked over to see Y/N trying to pull Lily out of the stables … with a saddle secured on the horse’s back.

He narrowed his eyes at the sight. Why the hell would she need a saddle unless —

His blood immediately turned cold, and he started heading towards her, barely noticing the pain in his leg as he marched over in her direction.

••••••••••

“C’mon, Lily!” You snapped as the horse threw its head back in protest. You grasped the reins firmly and pulled, “Why are you givin’ me such a hard time, girl?” Letting out a sharp snit, you continued to pull, but the stupid horse refused to budge after you’d pulled her out of the stables. Lily had never behaved this way in the past. So why on earth was she doing it now of all times? You began to grow irritated.

“Y/N!!”

That voice had you freeze in your tracks, your blood turning ice-cold. There was no way — you turned your head hesitantly to look behind you.

Arthur was stomping towards you.

And he looked absolutely terrifying.

You felt the sudden strong urge to hide behind your horse. Instead, you turned around to face him as he approached you, hiding the reins behind your back. As if that did anything for you? You're such a moron, Y/N, you thought to yourself.

“What the hell do you think you’re doin’, woman?” Arthur snapped as he stopped in front of you, his blue-green stare all but shooting fire as he glowered down at you.

You bit your lip, unable to meet his gaze directly. You knew you’d been caught completely red-handed, so what else could you possibly do? His towering form alone intimidated you, itwas almost overwhelming. You could barely find any train of thought being so close to him when he was this angry.

Then you quickly realized: he was out of bed. You ran your eyes over his body, taking in the strange way he held himself, his hand holding his shoulder, leaning most of his weight on his right leg … You narrowed your eyes as you shot your own glare back up at him, “I could say the same about you,” you snapped back, all wit completely leaving you mind as you stepped up to this large foreboding man standing in front of you. “What the hell do you think you’re doin’ out of bed?”

Right after you said the words, you wished you hadn’t said anything at all. You didn’t think it was possible, but those eyes of his suddenly grew even darker, almost pained.

“Excuse me?” He asked roughly. “You dare to turn this on me,” his drawl was deep as he spoke through gritted teeth, gravel rattling his dark tone, “when you goddamn promised me you wasn’t gonna do this?”

Your new shields immediately shattered at his words, and you flinched at his disappointed expression.

Letting out a shaky sigh, you lowered your head, looking down at the ground. “I’m sorry, Arthur … I just — I just didn’t want you risking your life again. You’re already hurt, because of me. None of this would’ve happened if I hadn’t let you leave the cabin in the first place.” You closed your eyes, “Just please let me do this, alright?”

Silence.

You couldn’t look up at him. You didn’t want to see any of his disapproval directed towards you.

You could feel his intense stare, but you still refused to look up as several seconds passed.

“Get on the horse,” he said roughly, his dark voice suddenly interrupting the still air.

You jerked your head up to look at him, confused. “What?”

“Get on the goddamn horse!” He shouted, then held up a hand to his mouth as he let out a hard cough. He hunched over, his shoulders shaking as the coughs suddenly took over his entire body.

His violent fit had you reaching a hand out to him, but he immediately pushed it away. His harsh rejection felt like a stab to your chest, and you felt helpless as you watched him wheeze through the fit alone.

Finally he slapped at his chest, clearing his throat as he straightened. His brows drew down tight as he narrowed his eyes down at you, “Get up on the damn horse.” He said hoarsely.

Without a word, you did as he said, assuming that he was going to send you on your way. But after the look he’d given you, no doubt with the pain he was going through right now, you didn’t want to leave him here alone. The hat could wait, you thought. You needed to stay here with him.

Arthur turned away … and grabbed the reins. To your shock, with a click of his tongue and a low “C’mon,” Lily lurched forward, and he began leading her toward the last path he and Austin had taken.

His unexpected action surprised you, “What’re you doin’?”

“You ain’t goin’ alone, and it’s clear I can’t trust you.” He let out another cough and cleared his throat again, “I’m takin’ you there myself before you do anythin’ stupid.”

Your eyes widened, stunned at his actions combined with what he was saying, “Are you insane? You’re hurt, there’s no way I’m gonna let you — ”

You tripped over your own tongue as he looked over his shoulder and leered at you. You clamped your mouth shut at his piercing stare, and watched helplessly as he turned back and limped toward the trail, Lily following him steadily.

After a while, it was more than obvious that he wasn’t going to let up on this, and you let out a hard sigh. “At least get up on the horse with me?”

He stopped in his tracks and looked back at you again, his gaze scrutinizing, but you kept your face stoic, showing him how serious you were.

With a huff, he released the reins and came over to the horse’s side. You reached a hand out as an offering, and he surprisingly took it, grasping it with a firm hold as he heaved himself over the back of the horse with his good leg.

Lily chortled, her hooves beating at the ground as she shook her head up and down in a bit of surprise.

“It’s alright, girl,” Arthur whispered to the horse, his soothing voice right next to your ear.

You shivered inwardly, almost feeling as though he were talking to you instead of Lily. Arthur adjusted himself behind you, scooting himself forward until his chest was right up against your back, his legs on either side of you as the front of his pants rubbed against your bottom.

Without another word, he reached around your waist to grab the reins and snapped them, clicking his tongue once more. Lily let out a soft putter and began to trot down the beaten path.

You were surprised at how well he handled Lily, watching his hands as he steered the horse effortlessly through the trees. He sped the horse up again with another kick and click, and Lily whinnied as she lurched forward at a higher speed.

At first, the feeling of this man sitting so closely behind you on horseback felt almost strange, giving you a mixed feeling of discomfort at first, but then it slowly turned into something else — arousal? He inhaled deeply through your nose, taking in his musky scent.

You closed your eyes, absorbing the feeling of his warm body pressed up to yours like this. You couldn’t help but notice how warm his skin felt even through the fabric of both of your clothes, the heat of him against you feeling so incredibly intimate. You almost wanted to rest your hands on his thighs, but you didn’t dare.

There was no doubt in your mind that he was incredibly furious with you right now, that now was definitely not the time to be entertaining any kind of sexual fantasies — but that still didn’t change the physical reaction you were having to him …

At first you tried to distract yourself with the rising sun, with the sound of the wind as it whipped through your hair, the early morning birds tittering high up in the treetops.

… Nothing was working.

You let out a soft breath, deciding it would be best to try and make conversation with him, “Thank you, Arthur.”

Silence behind you.

“I’m sorry for breaking my promise.”

More silence.

You turned your head to look up at him, but he didn’t look down, his eyes focused on the trail ahead as he gradually sped the horse up to a canter with another soft kick.

The movement of the horse caused his body to thrust up against yours in such a way that dark thoughts immediately began to make their way back into your mind.

You quickly shook them off, however. You weren’t going to allow yourself to think that way, especially not right at this moment, no matter how much you wanted to.

The ride up toward the mountain was quiet, Lily’s heavy hoofbeats the only sound that joined in with nature’s as the three of you travelled up the narrow trail.

••••••••••

Arthur was absolutely livid with this woman.

The sight of her leaving the stables with her horse, clearly planning on leaving by herself, it was all he could do not to start pulling his own hair out. She was a goddamn fool for trying to leave on her own. A part of him had wanted to shout at her until his damn black lungs had given out, another part of him had wanted to drag her over to the river and toss her into the cold water to help clear her foolish head.

But dammit, he’d given in.

What the hell was wrong with him?

“Thank you, Arthur.”

Her unexpected words had him closing his eyes briefly. He couldn’t allow himself to speak, he was afraid he was going to say something he would later regret.

“I’m sorry for breaking my promise.” She looked up at him, but he did his best to not show any emotion until she looked away again.

He almost chuckled, but he bit his own tongue to keep from doing so. He wasn’t sure if she was actually sincere in her words, but it amused him that she was trying so hard to break him.

What she didn’t realize, however, is that she had already done so.

He had no idea why he was doing this, instead of just going back to the cabin and locking her in one of the rooms until her brother got back.

But of course he knew.

Even though he hated it, this damn woman had him by the reins, whether he wanted to admit it or not.

He kept himself from speaking the rest of the way, driving the horse into a gallop despite the protests his body was starting to give off, little bolts of pain shooting out from his injuries from the momentum. He pushed through, ignoring the pain as best he could. At least it ain’t near as bad compared to that damn gunshot wound you’d gotten all them months back, he thought to himself.

Arthur let out a gasp as the wound in his neck stung sharply, sending a large bolt of pain into his head and shoulders. He hunched over, causing the horse to slow as his grip on the reins loosened. The sudden tensing of his chest irritated his lungs, and he began to cough again.

“Arthur?”

Y/N’s voice sounded through his ears, and he shook his head, “I’m fine,” he said with a hard huff through the fit. He lifted his hand to his mouth coughing even harder.

After a couple minutes, his lungs settled, and he finally straightened back up — only to see Y/N’s eyes looking back up at him, a look of worry in her gaze as she studied him.

He lifted a thick brow at her in question, almost as if to challenge her. He so wasn’t in the mood for pity right now. He was never a man to accept or tolerate sympathy from anyone, honestly.

She seemed to read him loud and clear, however, and turned her gaze away as he pushed the horse back into a gallop.

He could be proud of her respect for his dignity, at least.

At last, after what felt like an eternity, they reached the location. As Arthur slowed the horse down, he scanned their surroundings, examining everything he possibly could. The familiar location where he and Austin had been attacked brought back a strange feeling in his gut, but it wasn’t the near-death experience he’d had with a wolves that brought it around.

No.

It was the cave opening on the side of the mountain as his eyes landed on it once more … the same one from his dreams.

His chest instantly began to ache, and he squeezed his eyes shut tightly, letting out a grunt as he turned away from the sight. He climbed off the horse before Y/N could say anything.

“Wait, let me — ”

“No,” he snapped. He already knew what she was going to say. She wanted him to stay on the horse as she searched for the hat, but there was no way in hell that he was going to allow her to walk around in the tall grass alone as he sat back like some kind of coward. He began making his way through the grass, “Just get off and help me look.”

He could feel her disapproving glare shooting a hole through the back of his head, but he ignored it.

She let out a very unladylike curse, and he could hear rustling behind him as she climbed off the horse and ran over to catch up with him.

They searched for the hat for a while, for what felt like a little over half an hour. He found small traces of blood in several areas. No doubt the wolves’ and his own. He was just glad that Y/N was searching on the other side of the meadow so that she didn’t have to see it. It must’ve rained a bit while he’d been knocked out, since most of it had washed away, but enough was still there that he could easily reimagine the entire thing in his head.

Eventually she shouted out to him. He looked over to her, and saw that she was standing by the cave opening, holding up her grandfather’s hat for him to see, the owl feather clear as day.

A large part of him felt a sudden wave relief that she’d found it, but at the same time the vision of that cave caused a piercing ache to shoot through his head as he saw it again. He groaned at the unexpected pain, but he pushed it away, making his way over to her until he reached her side.

Before he could say a word, she reached up on her tiptoes and placed the hat firmly back on his head. He couldn’t help a small grin stretch his lips as she smiled up at him the way she did in that moment.

Everything seemed to disappear around him, including the cave, as he looked into those beautiful eyes of hers. His anger forgotten, his pain melting away as he stared down at her. He took a step toward her, and then another, until their bodies were nearly touching.

Her expression softened when she realized what he was about to do, “Arthur — ”

A tiny whine suddenly echoed from the darkness of the cave, causing them both to jump.

Arthur immediately came to his senses, examining the black void of nothingness. He stepped back, taking Y/N’s hand and pulling her behind him as he slowly began backing away.

“Arthur, what — ”

“Hush,” he snapped under his breath, his eyes narrowed at the opening of the cave as he carefully and quietly began backing them toward the horse. They had no weapons with them, if a beast was lurking in the shadows of the cave and noticed they were out here, they would — He shook his head, refusing to complete the thought.

Another whine, weaker this time, permeated out from the cave.

“Arthur, wait!”

Damn him, but her sharp voice caused him to lose focus slightly, and she broke free of his hold, running toward the cave.

What the hell!!

He cursed as he went after her, “Dammit, woman, get back here!”

She didn’t listen to him, however, and she disappeared into the inky blackness.

Arthur’s heart began racing, his blood pumping hot and fast through his veins. His chest tightened, and he immediately began to cough as he approached the cave’s entrance. He cursed again and pushed through the fit, running inside to see where she’d gone. As he entered, he called out to her, coughing between shouting her name and every insult he could think of for being such a damn idiot. He pounded at his chest, trying to force the fit down.

“Arthur!” Her voice rang out from the darkness, and he followed the sound until he finally found her in the back, several feet from the cave’s opening. She was on her knees, looking down at something.

“What the hell … did you think … you were doin’?” He shouted at her through coughs.

She turned to look over her shoulder, “I recognized the sounds.”

He looked at her questioningly, then walked over to her side to look over her shoulder.

In her arms, was a tiny wolf pup …

… with scars running down the right side of its face.

•••••

— To Be Continued

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope this was worth the long wait! Please share this if you enjoyed, leave behind a like and a comment if you can, your feedback is greatly appreciated and truly fuels the story along! 🐺❤️🦌


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